Feeling guilty

[Armywife]

Hi ladies,

I have 2 beautiful, perfect, clever, funny little girls who I wouldn't change for the world. When I was pregnant with my eldest I prayed for a girl, when I was pregnant with my second I again hoped for a girl. Our original plans were to have 4 or 5 children but due to my medical issues this will be our last baby.

I am now DESPERATE for a boy, I want to cry every time I see friends who have boys. I really feel like I need to be a mummy to a boy. On top of that I've got people left, right and centre asking me if I'm hoping for a boy and just adding to the pressure. If I were to have another girl I will be happy and of course I will love her with my whole heart, I'm just so desperate for a boy.

I feel beyond guilty for feeling this way - surely as a mum I should just be hoping for a healthy baby (which of course I am), gender shouldn't matter?

 

[jamhs]

This is my situation in reverse. I really want a girl. I love my boys, I just want a little girl to add to the mix. I'm still team yellow, as I figured it would be easier to accept if I have another boy when he is here in my arms. If I have a girl though it will be the icing on the cake. Don't feel guilty because I think it is a natural feeling.

 

[ILoveYouZandT]

Agreed with above! Try not to feel guilty. I know that's easier said than done as I'm in the same situation (reverse as well). I want a little girl so ridiculously bad, but I will still love this baby if it's a boy. I feel bad at the idea of having an hard feelings towards the baby possibly being a boy. It's an internal battle you know?!

And a lot of people who have never experienced GD before really have no idea. And when they say things like "As long as it's healthy, that's all the matters!" they really have no idea how much that can hurt and sting someone who is experiencing GD. My husband said it to me a few weeks ago (even though he wants a girl soo badly as well) and I just looked at him and said "That's a given, but it doesn't make my feelings go away and it doesn't help me when you say that". Which is the truth. Obviously we want the babies to be healthy regardless, but it's hard as hell when you see people around you who have no preference of gender getting one of each, or all the genders they saw themselves with.

I've been there more than enough times! Don't feel bad. =)

 

[tiggertiger]

I felt bad after I was told I was having another son which was fine for me as I now have two of each But my new partner really wanted a girl as there is none In his family

I felt really bad when we told his family it was like the baby didnt matter anymore cause they already have so many boys


Now that LO is a year old I would love to try for another girl but I now I'd be crushed if it another boy

 

[mrsholmes]

Army wife are you going to find out? Maybe help with bonding if it is a girl? X

 

[Armywife]

Yes, I will find out. I know I'll love her if it's a girl but I'll be very sad never to experience the whole mummy/son thing xxx

 

[jenniferttc1]

It's okay to feel that way and honestly I think most women do have a preference. I hope you get your little man!

 

[Jo.t]

I would love a boy - even though I have 3 of each allready !

Of course as long as he/she is healthy is what we should hope for - but we cant help feeling this way ! Xx