finding feeding so hard already

[MissRhead]

my LO is nearly 1 day old, im trying to breastfeed but its really getting me down, I just dont know if im doing it right, so many people keep telling me different ways to latch him on, he hardly wakes for feeds and when he does its only for a tiny amount of time, hes had poos but no wet nappies. we went back to hospital last night because he just wouldnt wake for feeds and was really cold, i feel like im starving him, is it supposed to be like this, please help its really stressing me out

 

[MoldyVoldy]

Are you sure his diapers are dry? When my DS was a day old his pees were SO SMALL that I literally had to wipe my hand over his diaper to check for pee. Maybe try using a cloth diaper? It won't absorb all the urine and there will be a definite wet spot to help you see. Or hey, no diaper at all lol!

As for the actual breastfeeding, it's hard for anyone here to really give you great advice since we aren't with you in person. I don't know what the LC told you. But I also had awful advice while still in the hospital, so I understand what you're feeling.

My advice:

Skin to skin feeding. Get comfy, take your top off and also get your LO naked. Put a blanket over LO so he doesn't get cold. Offer your breast. When offering your breast, never push yourself to your baby - bring your baby to you. So don't lean over, don't pull on your breast, none of that. Simply take the baby and pull him to your breast.

Nurse on demand. When he cries, stick your boob in his mouth. lol. You may need to wake him every 2-3 hours during the first week(s) to both ensure he's getting enough and to ensure your supply is good.

I'll be back if I think of anything else.

Good luck, mama.

 

[HBGirl]

My LO would go 4 hours in the first few days if we let her. Also, she only started getting wet nappys after the milk cme in on day 3.

 

[MissRhead]

Ok, thankyou so much, im just really not feeling confident with it, when i try ti hand express a tiny amount comes out but surely that's not enough? He had a really long feed on one side fell asleep then woke back up soon after and had another on the other side, then he stayed awake for a little while just looking around and is asleep again. Im just so scared he isnt getting anything

 

[moomin_troll]

The best latching advise I was given was if feeding from the left breast, hold babies head with ur right hand and ur breast with ur left. So much easier to guide the baby on with their mouth is at it's biggest. Corey constantly fed, so I can only imagine your frustration and worry
Hopefully feeding will improve

 

[Kelx44]

I had my baby 3 days ago and know exactly how I feel!!!!'n my first baby as well. It's hard but ppl say don't give up it will get easier and u and baby will know what too do soon. It's a learning experience for both. Make sure ur partner helps out I find it makes it so much easier. If he wasn't around I wouldn't be doing it. Keep alternating breasts every 15-20 min. I don't have much advice as this is allll new too me too.

 

[HBGirl]

Breastfeeding sucks the first few days to 2 weeks in my experience. I nearly gave up. Its so much easier now.

 

[everdreaming]

I found it so hard to spot wet nappies at first, her first 2 days she had maybe 2 a day, really tiny wees. Remember the colostrum isn't in huge amounts so baby wont be peeing much.

I can't add more to the other ladies advice but I second skin to skin. It really helped us get feeding right it also helps baby regulate their temperature so the two of you in bed with a blanket should help.

 

[c.m.c]

I felt like my lo didn't pee at all at first and I was soooooo concerned..... I kept thinking she's not peeing but I took her nappy off for half an hr and she pee all over the blanket ... Just very very little amount at start as there's not much waste


If baby is pooing then they're defo getting your milk

It's so hard at the start I'm only day 19 now bad I still am not confident yet but it has got easier.... And she has massive wet nappies from day five on

Keep at it.... You're not starving your baby... Breastfeeding is hard but it's also human nature ... I just thought to myself that hundreds of years ago when there was no formula it had to work then so it had to work for me

Trust that your body is doing it right for baby and I second everyone's advice before me. You're doing a great job so far !!!!!

 

[sept10]

I hardly produced any milk the first few days...midwife was very encouraging and said baby's are born pretty set for the first few days and don't need much, also colostrum is loaded with goodness do again they only need the smallest amount! Be prepared to feel like your not producing enough cause babies are designed to want to nurse on your breast almost constantly from day 2-3 for the next few days to basically encourage your milk to come in....my milk came in about day 7 so it was tough going but worth it in the end!!

 

[Bunnikins]

Agreed about the small wees being hard to tell. I used the pampers with the wet indicator that turns blue when nappy has a wee in it. That was the ONLY way i could tell she had weed! (I got a bit obsessed with poo/wee counting!)

I felt like i was starving baby for first 4 days until milk came in. It feels like she was getting nothing. Poos turning yellowish on day 2 and gradually getting yellower was reassuring.

Good luck with it

 

[MissRhead]

Thanks for the replys, nothing has changed really, if anything it's getting harder to latch him on I don't know if it's because I'm getting worked up about it. I'm finding the whole experience awful, I'm on my own with them and my other LO won't sleep and wants to be next to me constantly too, I just feel so down and finding bonding hard with the baby. I have his newborn checks this afternoon and I just want to tell them I don't want to do it but I daren't. I just feel like a failure

 

[leigh5tom]

You do what is best for you and your baby. We can tell you to keep at it and you're doing great but that's not helping you right now. Evaluate the situation and decide on a plan. If you move to formula you might regret it, but if you stick at it you might regret being so stressed and upset during the first few days with your newborn. This should be a happy (yet tiring) time for you.
It does get easier if you were to stick at it believe me. But if you are finding it hard to bond because of breastfeeding struggles, have a good think about what you want to do and NEVER feel you are a failure!! xxxxx

 

[Rodnabell]

Gawd... Been there, done that! Things that helped me; red brick dust nappy on day 3 which showed he'd wee 'd... Before that had no clue and after it's been relentless! Can u hear baby making a 'k' sound? Thus ya when he swallows ... He has the tiniest tummy so only needs tiny amount if milk to start with. It's so early in your journey ... I thinks most people experience what you're going through! I'd give it a week and you'll see the difference!

 

[paintrider89]

Hey, congratulations! Good to see you over here!

Sorry to hear you are having a hard time. I dont have any advice for you really. The nurses at the hospital told me baby should pee once for every day old they are, for example, 1 day=1 pee, 2days=2pees, exc. My LO also didn't want to do much in the first 24 to 48 hours or so. My LO went 6 hours with no eating and the nurse had us go skin to skin and tickled baby's feet to wake her enough so we could get her to eat. Even now if she goes to sleep on the boob I play with her feet to get her going again.

Good luck, and congrats again

 

[Popples1]

My LO was sleepy, jaundiced and mucusy for the first few days. He didn't latch on at all for the first couple and instead I had to finger feed him drops of colostrum. He didn't have anything like a proper meal until day 3, when we resorted to expressed milk and formula top ups. Even then I had to wake him for feeds for at least a week because he was so sleepy. You're right to keep an eye on things but your LO won't starve in a day, don't worry. It's sounds like you're doing a great job x

 

[pinkpolkadot]

Sorry you're having a hard time, don't feel bad, it can be tough at the beginning! Do you have anything like Homestart where you live, the ladies will come to your house to help out with BF if you can't get out to a group?

Babies tummy is so tiny right now (marble size) that they do only take tiny amounts at a time and until your milk comes in you only produce a small amount of colostrum. It will get easier when your milk comes in in a few days. A lot of ladies find they can't express much so it's not a great indicator of how much baby is getting.

I also found DD to be sleepy in the first couple of days, changing her before a feed helped wake her a bit, undressing her or tickling her!

 

[Kelx44]

BUY a nipple shield!!!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously lol. I am on day 4 with baby a nurse gave me one yesterday and omg MIRICALE!!!! He latches now!!!!

 

[dairymomma]

First of all, was your baby early? My kids were both 3 weeks early and slept literally for like 13 hours straight the first day even though we (me, DH, and several nurses) would undress them, change diapers, tap their heels, wipe them with cool cloths, etc. But then when they'd wake up to eat, they'd nurse for over an hour and each day they'd sleep less and less. (2nd day-7 hours, 3rd day-4 hours, 5th day and on-up every 2-3 hours) So the dr wasn't worried.

Secondly, in the first day or so, you aren't making actual breast milk. You are making colostrum or pre-milk. It's a really thick, dense, nutrient-rich liquid and it's so full of good stuff, your baby doesn't need very much of it to fill their tiny little tummies. Your milk should come in after a few days and then you'll notice that his/her feedings are picking up. And as the previous poster said, you can't go by how much you express as an indication of how much you are actually making. My sis can pump with anything (manual or electric pump) and even expresses by hand on occasion with no difficulty while I can't pump with anything but an electric pump (and that's only if I can pump both sides at the same time. One side at a time and I get nada. Both sides together, I can get up to 6 oz total.) while my s-i-l can't use a pump at all and hand expressing has never worked either.

 

[noon_child]

I'm not going to offer specific advice because as you already said, you are getting conflicting advice and it's getting you down. What I would say is that everything you describe sounds like very normal newborn behaviour. Please dont believe that evry newborn and new mother instinctively knew how to feed and you are the only one without a clue. Sooooooo many of us could have written your original post. It sounds exactly like my LO and we finally managed to get there and I fed her to 27months!!

Newborn babies ARE sleepy, will constantly fall asleep on boob, fail to open their mouths wide enough etc.

Poos are a good sign - don't expect much visable wee as your milk doesn't come in till 3-5 days after LO is born and the amount of cholostrum you make is tiny, so not much comes out.

La Leche League and NCT have great support available (just someone to cry at half the time) so please get in touch with them. They stay with you for more than just the first 2mins of a feed and know their stuff so you can trust what they say.