First day back at work tomorrow

[Gray001]

Hi ladies,

Just after a bit if reassurance that it gets easier?
It's my first day back at work tomorrow after 10 months off and I do not feel ready for it at all!! I've spent 10 months having so much fun with my ds and I can't stand the thought that I'm not going to see him for 11 hours a day! I have managed to cut my hours down to 3 10 hour days so I will get 4 days a week with him but it's so hard going from knowing exactly what he's doing all day everyday to him being at a childminders and I'm not going to know when he cries, laughs, naps ect. I'm probably being a bit stupid and over protective but it's really panicking me.

Have any of you recently gone back to work feeling like this and does it get any easier? X

 

[Julesillini8]

Well I went back to work part time when my first little one was 3 months old. It was only a couple days of the week but it was still extremely difficult- emotional. It does get better. The baby gets settled and you adjust eventually to leaving her, and in the end it's just the new routine of how it is. It does get better, Just not overnight, it does take some time because yes it's sad to be away. Hugs and best wishes!

 

[Julesillini8]

Ah I see you have a boy, so I guess I meant leaving HiM ( my first was a girl and that's just how I was writing!)

 

[Gray001]

Thanks for tour reply I'm sure ones we get settled in our new routine I will be fine I will just miss spending all my time with him x

 

[george83]

I had to go back full time after having my lo and it was so tough. I found that I constantly felt sad and guilty about leaving him so had to almost compartmentalise my feelings - I hated leaving him but accepted that I had too and put all my guilt and sadness into a box and then actually I was quite excited to get back to work. In the end I only did 18 months before going on maternity leave again and managed to get part time after that which I found much more bearable.

 

[k4th]

It's hard but it does get easier

And the time you do spend with your ds ends up being extra precious to you. Good luck for tomorrow

 

[SoupDragon]

I could have written your post myself.

I had 11.5 months off but nearly 6 weeks of that was before my DD arrived, so I went back full time a couple of weeks ago, just after she turned 10 months.

I hated the thought of not knowing what she's doing all day, and I still struggle with it now - I've found it really hard relying on someone else to tell me what the most important person in my life is doing and how she's been that day. I had a bit of an emotional meltdown at the childminder's last week when I went to collect DD, and the childminder has been texting me photos and updates a few times each day since. I don't think this will continue long-term, but I'm finding it very helpful just now. That's my one gripe about the childminder we use; that they don't have a diary for the little ones. Older kids I wouldn't necessarily expect it, but for a baby, it's useful to know how many dirty/wet nappies, when food/milk/water was given, how long each nap was and when it was etc. They do a verbal handover but things invariably get missed - e.g. I have no idea why DD didn't have any milk today, so I'll have to ask tomorrow. They keep a learning journal for them, with photos and details of things they've done, but it's not an every day thing and it only gets sent home every so often.

My advice would just be to be completely honest with the childminder and say you're finding the transition hard and you need some extra help.

Once I'd seen DD obviously having a whale of a time and happily interacting with the childminder and the other kids, I relaxed a bit...I still wish I was with her all day, and I'm desperately hoping we win the lottery sometime soon so that can happen, but knowing she's happy and well looked after is half the battle, and seeing her reaching her arms out to me and yelling with excitement and snuggling into me when I come to collect her reassures me that the childminder hasn't replaced me.

I will say also that the thought of going back to work was so much worse than actually doing it, by miles. As much as I'd really rather be with DD all day, I do enjoy my job, and it's kinda nice to be able to concentrate on just one thing at a time sometimes

 

[Gray001]

Thanks ladies for all your responses they have helped.

Soupdragon that's exactly how I'm feeling and your right I will have a chat with the childminder about keeping me updated when she can through the day.

Up and starting to get ready for work and I've forgotten what I used to do!! Oh I can see people really having to have patience with me today while I get my bearings!

 

[Julesillini8]

Best wishes!

 

[SoupDragon]

I hope your day has gone well, and little man's too!

 

[Gray001]

Well it sounds like my ds had a while of a time I got a text off our childminder saying what lucky parents we are to have such a happy baby which made me feel really good!
My day on the other hand was awful I just wanted to leave all day to go and give him a cuddle, I'm sure it will get better though, fingers crossed x