floored by a 5 year old

Discussion in 'Miscarriage Support' started by franky, Apr 21, 2009.

  1. franky

    franky second cycle after mc

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    i phoned my sister and my 5 year old nephew answered and we were talking about ben 10 and what he did at school and he suddenly said "have you lost your baby?" i didnt know what to say, i was totally speechless, my sister shouted at him and grabbed the phone and I know it wasnt his fault but I didnt know what to say.

    It has been 8 weeks since the mc and I know at the time he had heard my sister talking about it and asked my sister "has auntie fran found her baby yet" coz he heard people saying i had lost the baby. My sister sat down with him and explained things and he hasnt said anything since so this was out the blue.

    I felt like I was pulling myself together coz we have started trying again but this has really upset me :cry:
     
  2. AppleBlossom

    AppleBlossom Guest

    :hugs: hun. Kids obviously find these kinds of things hard to understand. It must be very hard x
     
  3. Jo

    Jo I'm an old bag!

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    Oh love :hugs:
    Kids have a knack of saying things just so to knock the wind out of you
    at 5 they still have a limited understanding

    Emily was 5 when i miscarried and evry so often she would ask if the baby was back in my tummy and that would just knock me right back down again.

    It will always upset you to some degree darling whether it is 8 weeks, 8 months or 8 years, it is just that the upset gets less frequent

    :hugs:
     
  4. AP

    AP Well-Known Member
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    I'm so sorry hun! You must be feeling utter rubbish now :hug:

    i know how you feel. When i had my first miscarriage, my mum insisted on coming up to the hospital to make sure i was ok. She had to bring my sister though. my sister, at the time, was nearly 5.(age 5, going on 19)

    She heard everything that was mentioned, but never spoke until a few days later when i called my Gran, who was looking after her one afternoon.

    She came on the phone and asked me if me "and OH were going to have another baby now that the other baby died"

    She is my beautiful little sister, but like you, tears streamed from my eyes and i had no idea what to say.

    Little children dont really understand 100% to be honest, but your sister should have been a little more careful about what was said in front of your nephew. Many a times my mother speaks about things that she shouldnt, only for my little sister to soon spill the beans.

    More :hug: xxxxxxxxxxxx
     
  5. todteach

    todteach Dreams can come true

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    Right from the mouth of babes. So sorry you had to hear this, and were caught off guard by your wee nephew. Sending you :hugs: I would be absolutely floored and left speachless too. Children are just so innocent, aren't they. Take care hun. xox
     
  6. superp123

    superp123 Super Auntie to 3 + 1

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    kids do say some of the most inappropriate things sometimes. But it's a lot of the time because they simply do not understand. You shouldn't worry too much about what to say in instances like this... his mum should have explained it to him in a way that he can understand. I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you hun and I hope you're okay. Big :hugs:
    P
     
  7. Las78

    Las78 Mum to 3 beautiful girls

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    Hun, so sorry, that must have hurt. Kids just don't understand. My 7y old asked me when we were going to the scan (I promised to take her) after I lost our baby! A few weeks on and she told someone " My mums baby is dead", so harsh, that hurt but I just put it down to kids being so brutally open and honest.

    Sending you huge hugs x
     
  8. Nikkinoonoo

    Nikkinoonoo Mummy to a gorgeous girl

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    I'm so sorry for your loss :hugs::hug::hugs:
     
  9. bklove

    bklove We got married 4/07

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    :hugs: I think the 5year old just hit a sore spot, but I do hope your road to healing is going well.
     
  10. gnomette

    gnomette mummy of 2 an 2 angels x

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    i am sorry your nephew caught you thing is 5year olds just want to ask why what an how all the time! when my son was 3 my oh's brother died and he asked oh when he was comin back to play superman with him once we explained what had happened (that he had gone to heaven) he asked how why what for and when was he coming back when was he going to see him again and if he couldnt see us when can we go and see him? and my oh just snapped and cryed but kids just dont understand unfortunatly they dont get the whole tact thing at that age and it just makes things harder cause you know its not intentional but doesnt mean it hurts any less sending you bigs hugs and lots of love
    :hug::hug::hug:
     
  11. franky

    franky second cycle after mc

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    thanks for all your kind words ladies
    xx
     

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