KarenBaby - My solicitor said my FOB wouldn't get access until at least the age of 3 so I am really confused as to why you have been told by 2 different solicitors. Have you actually been to court and had this overnight visitation granted because I strongly believe FOB wouldn't get this.
OP, if you feel FOB is not looking after LO properly unsupervised then you have every right to reject further unsupervised visitation. If I were you I would make a note in a notebook about all the things you've described. If FOB takes you to court this journal will go more in your favour than just saying he what he did. ALWAYS keep notes I say.
Men are thick, lets be honest, so you could write down everything he needs to do and when when he has LO or simply make him do it all at yours now until you feel happy.
IMO I think you will finder it harder to let him have unsupervised again if you stop if now after letting him. You could give me another chance but sit him down and say to him your pissed off and it stops now and you have written down what he's to do when and is to stick to it.
MY FOB only gets supervised, but he can care for my daughter in the sense of changing nappy, feeding, dirty clothes etc. He lacks common sense and the ability to not listen to his stupid mates and be influenced/distracted while looking after our LO.
But you are well within your right to stop him taking LO off x
