For ladies who hope to breastfeed-I wish somebody told me!

[ashley2pink]

And newborns like to suck when they arent hungry. You aren't supposed to give a pacifier until at 4 weeks. My 3.5 weeks old loves to nurse even when she doesnt want milk. She has just barely eaten, then gets really fussy acting like she is hungry(sucking on her hands etc) so I will nurse her and she is happy until my milk lets down, then she gets upset and spits the milk out and cries. Then wants to go back on then will suck and get mad when she starts getting milk again. Its very tiring because she will cry if she isnt sucking, but also when she has to drink! Happens a few times a day, mainly at night. Also, happened with my last baby. The first 2-3 months are pretty erratic and there is no schedule with most nursing babies.

 

[sequeena]

Not everyone will have a baby who naturally latches on. On the early days Thomas would be on and off the boob and would scream and scream which was mentally and physically exhausting and actually quite traumatising as I did not expect it to be so hard and hearing him cry like that was awful. In the end I had to give up as I was not producing enough but in those precious moments where he latched on and fed properly wow how amazing did I feel

 

[Aquarius24]

Another tip is too express in the early days on top on the feeding - this will increase your milk supply for the growth spurts xx

 

[MommyMoore503]

Thanks to ALLLLL of you who have shared your stories and advice. I wasn't able to breastfeed #1 due to a prolactinoma, and with #2 I got very emotionally tired trying at the hospital. Once I saw how content she was being fed from the bottle I quickly gave up, afraid that I was being cruel by letting her go hungry while I tried to figure things out. This time around I really want to do things differently. My tumor has since been treated and I can tell my breasts are preparing much differently than before. I can't express how much I appreciate you all sharing your experiences in a caring way for those of us who struggle with BFing. I hope I can continue to find support like this throughout the time my next daughter is born. I've been doing a lot mroe research on BFing and hopefully go into this with all the correct knowledge so I won't panic and give into formula. Thank you all for not judging those of us who don't quite get it right the first (or second) time. Society can be so cruel and pushy sometimes and what all of us mothers need is support, not judgement. Good luck to you all!!!!!
XOXO
Suzy

 

[Pretty Please]

One thing to point out though if your baby wont take the breast after everyone in the hospital has tried to help you and your baby. Its better than the baby does get formula and dont feel like your a failure or guilty for being unable to BF.

All the years of caring until the baby is an adult certainly takes over than a year or so of BF.

Dont let anyone force you one way or the other it should be the choice of you at the end of the day !!!!

It's very important women don't feel like failures, i agree, and when women don't manage to crack BFing first time, that they don't walk away feeling negatively and associate BFing with misery. Second time around, mums often do manage it and find the whole baby thing easier generally.

I have to disagree though - if you get home and are still struggling, i'd advise having the number of 24 hour support by phone and have an expert come over and demonstrate the latch, advice about upping your supply, or just reassure you. "Failure" (yuk horrible word) to BF is down to insufficient or poor support, so have numbers ready immediately. Don't assume your MW is an expert in BFing as they have only done the initial basic training, and that isn't anywhere near enough for a lot of them - they aren't all passionate and as knowledgeable as they should be.

I completely disagree with you. I must of had at least literally 30 people try to help me when my LO was in a special care baby unit as he was premature . He also had other health issues and was tired and ill to BF. When I came home I was still trying as I was pumping went to walk in centres, MW health checks, also spoke to 6 people on the phone and finally resorted to my mum who is a MW and health visitor for 40 years and everyone said literally my baby wouldnt BF and he needs formula to put on weight otherwise he is in danger which was stated at the hospital and out came milk and a bottle by a MW (which I completely agreed with the MW otherwise I could of been in hospital longer than the 2 weeks after birth which drives you crazy due to lack of sleep). There is some babies in the world that do not want to BF and some mothers who have health issues and cant BF due to milk.

I think its really important that first time mums know that it is sometimes impossible to BF (even if you want to) and dont feel the guilt of other health care professionals / mothers given you "oh you dont BF". My life now has been so much easier not BF as my husband can help out with night feeds and sometimes my sister helps out in the day.

Just do whats best for you and your baby and dont feel the pressure of anyone else xxxxx

 

[allaboard]

One thing to point out though if your baby wont take the breast after everyone in the hospital has tried to help you and your baby. Its better than the baby does get formula and dont feel like your a failure or guilty for being unable to BF.

All the years of caring until the baby is an adult certainly takes over than a year or so of BF.

Dont let anyone force you one way or the other it should be the choice of you at the end of the day !!!!

It's very important women don't feel like failures, i agree, and when women don't manage to crack BFing first time, that they don't walk away feeling negatively and associate BFing with misery. Second time around, mums often do manage it and find the whole baby thing easier generally.

I have to disagree though - if you get home and are still struggling, i'd advise having the number of 24 hour support by phone and have an expert come over and demonstrate the latch, advice about upping your supply, or just reassure you. "Failure" (yuk horrible word) to BF is down to insufficient or poor support, so have numbers ready immediately. Don't assume your MW is an expert in BFing as they have only done the initial basic training, and that isn't anywhere near enough for a lot of them - they aren't all passionate and as knowledgeable as they should be.

I completely disagree with you. I must of had at least literally 30 people try to help me when my LO was in a special care baby unit as he was premature . He also had other health issues and was tired and ill to BF. When I came home I was still trying as I was pumping went to walk in centres, MW health checks, also spoke to 6 people on the phone and finally resorted to my mum who is a MW and health visitor for 40 years and everyone said literally my baby wouldnt BF and he needs formula to put on weight otherwise he is in danger which was stated at the hospital and out came milk and a bottle by a MW (which I completely agreed with the MW otherwise I could of been in hospital longer than the 2 weeks after birth which drives you crazy due to lack of sleep). There is some babies in the world that do not want to BF and some mothers who have health issues and cant BF due to milk.

I think its really important that first time mums know that it is sometimes impossible to BF (even if you want to) and dont feel the guilt of other health care professionals / mothers given you "oh you dont BF". My life now has been so much easier not BF as my husband can help out with night feeds and sometimes my sister helps out in the day.

Just do whats best for you and your baby and dont feel the pressure of anyone else xxxxx

Sounds like you had a rough time and you know what, i might have done the same in your position. Although, i may well have mix fed by expressing, but again, not a judgement, just a different way around what must have been a distressing time. I have to disagree that some babies don't want to BF however, all babies are born wanting feeding, it's just knowing how to work around the complications that can seem impossible. I did say in my first post that as long as the pregnancy and birth are straight forward that formula isn't needed, and it does sound like your situation wasn't straight forward. I hope your next experience is nothing like your last one

 

[veebot]

with my little one he didnt gain alot of weight but he was gainning weight. at one point i thought he just wasnt eating enough but i didnt panic, i decided to give him one bottle of formula a day. that became his daddy's special time to feed him. worked like a charm. So just cos they arent fat and chunky doesnt mean something is wrong. Just adding the one bottle could do the trick.

It also meant that eventually i had to express cos i was making more than enough milk. He is a strong muscley and healthy 3 year old boy now even though he always weighed in the lower percentile. he never got sick, had a cold or diaper rash.

so unless your baby is literally starving no need to do away with breastfeeding cos they say he is not a certain weight. since when does everyone weigh exactly the same?