(for laughs) have you ever said or done anything stupid and then regretted it.

[RainbowDrop_x]

I just want to add...Their not my hen & chicken..Their googles..

 

[NickyT75]

For those who are interested

Oh my eyes!!Chicken porn!

LMAO!!! I almost peed myself when I saw that pic & this response! x

 

[~RedLily~]

I just want to add...Their not my hen & chicken..Their googles..

what did you google 'chicken sex'?

 

[CRWx]

i nearly spat my drink out, CHICKEN PORN

do you think those chickens are bernard matthews

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

I just want to add...Their not my hen & chicken..Their googles..

what did you google 'chicken sex'?

No...

The exact google term was "Chickens having sex" ...There's youtube videos and everything!!! I couldn't bring myself to watch them yet..That's a little bit too hardcore and intimate..Even for me

 

[CRWx]

 

[doctordeesmrs]

@chicken porn

 

[Floralaura]

Not mine but my DS1 whos 8..
At the pub quiz a week or so back (that wasnt especially for kids lol ) I was letting him and my friends DD help with answers. The question, Name 5 sexually transmitted diseases..the answer that my genuis Child screamed out much to the amusement of everyone? Swine flu! Hahah
He will not be let to forget it lol

 

[CRWx]

laughed so much ^

 

[mrscookie]

my admissions to be blonde
1. yes i did crash my moped looking in the co-op window at myself singing salon selective song, crashed into back of a car. cutting my leg, i was going for a perm although i have curly hair.

2. while in hospital after the crash i was looking out the window and saw a herd of cows out the window, i shouted the nurses and the cows disapeared they thought i was hallucinating and put me in a side room, they later found out they'd escaped from the farm next door.

3. i died my hair black and it went green when i was 16, ruined my mums best towels

4. i got suspended from school for playing truant.

5. i wore a knitted mohair jumper for the end of school disco (prom) cos a few certain people told me it was trendy.

6. i sold something of my cheating ex and ran off with the money shared it with some friends and went off on a drinking bender. to get him back haha.

7. i met someone got engaged and divorced in 1 yr when i was 21, there is more to that but cant write it on here.

8. i stole a tree from selston golf course and used it as a xmas tree.

9. i set fire to a mans chest with a lighter in a night club on his stag do, (it stank).

10. i tipped ice down someones top from a wine cooler in blackpool but the ice was melted lol (sorry nic) x

11. i flashed my boobs out of a blackpool hotel window (nic did too),

12. i've been burgled 3 times but only once had something pinched.

13. i had a dog food fight when drunk with one certain person, and it was in someone elses house.

14. i climbed up a stage at a nightclub performance act to get a light from the fire breather and nearly got thrown out the club.

15. i got so drunk on vodka by accident i stood on my front doorstep to get fresh air fell face forward into the grass and had to be helped into the house and put into bed by my next door neighbour,(hence i dont drink vodka anymore only to get trolleyed.)

16. i went to a job interview last yr but got petrol all over me 10 mins before the interview and didnt have time to go and change and to top it off i forgot my purse and had to give my address etc to the kiosk woman and if things werent bad enough when i pulled out the junction and had petrol on my shoes and my foot slipped off the clutch and flew into the middle of the road stalled the car nearly causing a crash. i apologised to the interviewer about stinking of petrol and found it funny and gave me the job.

17. in june 2007 to april 2008 i had about 10 job as i didnt like them for one reason or another.

18 . i thought roe caviar was fish sperm

19. i thought euro tunnel went to ireland

20. went for the wknd in dublin on the flight just before we took off i glued my false nail back on and stunk the whole plane out with super glue.

21. i thought cardiff was in scotland and carlisle in wales

22. when i went on hol a few yrs ago i got a trip mixed up and instead of going on the catalan senation choclate tsting trip i ticked the wrong box catermaran sensation trip and ended up on a bloody sailing boat with a net a foot above the sea (i've never been so scared in my whole life i tell ya) it sailed into the middle of nowhere in the ocean with a load of german weirdo's, trying to keep myself to myself with rosie intow they had a bbq on this boat, rosie had a plate of rice and alot of ketchup and as we sat at the front of the boat a gust of wind blew the plate out of her hand covering a load of germans at the back of the boat with the contents of her plate.

23. i went for a walk on the same holiday only to get caught in a rainstorm as we walked up this long road it started flooding, rosie said "why can i smell poo" yes it was the drains over flowing we only had flip flops on. nice....

24. same holiday rosie went to the shop bought a lilo everyone was pointing at her laughing so told her to come out the pool and gave a lecture to her to behave as swimming pools can be dangerous etc etc. anyway caught glance at her lilo and it haddevils all over it in very rude positions hence she spent the next week playing on the water on a giant mobile phone.

25. think my worst stupid thing was breaking my ankle and toes on my 1st lesson of tae kwondo oops. don't ask me how i have no idea lol

oh and rosie had a halloween party but the kids went a bit mental with my e numbered green coloured fairy cakes and ended up in the back garden playing football i sent them home all covered in mud as they stared rolling around int he grass, they just ignored me when i said stoppit lol. we dont do at home parties anymore.

i swear disaster follows me lol

Hahahahaha I remember half of these when you told me from when we met up lol, my fave was the salon selectives one!!
xxx

 

[helen1234]

my admissions to be blonde
1. yes i did crash my moped looking in the co-op window at myself singing salon selective song, crashed into back of a car. cutting my leg, i was going for a perm although i have curly hair.

2. while in hospital after the crash i was looking out the window and saw a herd of cows out the window, i shouted the nurses and the cows disapeared they thought i was hallucinating and put me in a side room, they later found out they'd escaped from the farm next door.

3. i died my hair black and it went green when i was 16, ruined my mums best towels

4. i got suspended from school for playing truant.

5. i wore a knitted mohair jumper for the end of school disco (prom) cos a few certain people told me it was trendy.

6. i sold something of my cheating ex and ran off with the money shared it with some friends and went off on a drinking bender. to get him back haha.

7. i met someone got engaged and divorced in 1 yr when i was 21, there is more to that but cant write it on here.

8. i stole a tree from selston golf course and used it as a xmas tree.

9. i set fire to a mans chest with a lighter in a night club on his stag do, (it stank).

10. i tipped ice down someones top from a wine cooler in blackpool but the ice was melted lol (sorry nic) x

11. i flashed my boobs out of a blackpool hotel window (nic did too),

12. i've been burgled 3 times but only once had something pinched.

13. i had a dog food fight when drunk with one certain person, and it was in someone elses house.

14. i climbed up a stage at a nightclub performance act to get a light from the fire breather and nearly got thrown out the club.

15. i got so drunk on vodka by accident i stood on my front doorstep to get fresh air fell face forward into the grass and had to be helped into the house and put into bed by my next door neighbour,(hence i dont drink vodka anymore only to get trolleyed.)

16. i went to a job interview last yr but got petrol all over me 10 mins before the interview and didnt have time to go and change and to top it off i forgot my purse and had to give my address etc to the kiosk woman and if things werent bad enough when i pulled out the junction and had petrol on my shoes and my foot slipped off the clutch and flew into the middle of the road stalled the car nearly causing a crash. i apologised to the interviewer about stinking of petrol and found it funny and gave me the job.

17. in june 2007 to april 2008 i had about 10 job as i didnt like them for one reason or another.

18 . i thought roe caviar was fish sperm

19. i thought euro tunnel went to ireland

20. went for the wknd in dublin on the flight just before we took off i glued my false nail back on and stunk the whole plane out with super glue.

21. i thought cardiff was in scotland and carlisle in wales

22. when i went on hol a few yrs ago i got a trip mixed up and instead of going on the catalan senation choclate tsting trip i ticked the wrong box catermaran sensation trip and ended up on a bloody sailing boat with a net a foot above the sea (i've never been so scared in my whole life i tell ya) it sailed into the middle of nowhere in the ocean with a load of german weirdo's, trying to keep myself to myself with rosie intow they had a bbq on this boat, rosie had a plate of rice and alot of ketchup and as we sat at the front of the boat a gust of wind blew the plate out of her hand covering a load of germans at the back of the boat with the contents of her plate.

23. i went for a walk on the same holiday only to get caught in a rainstorm as we walked up this long road it started flooding, rosie said "why can i smell poo" yes it was the drains over flowing we only had flip flops on. nice....

24. same holiday rosie went to the shop bought a lilo everyone was pointing at her laughing so told her to come out the pool and gave a lecture to her to behave as swimming pools can be dangerous etc etc. anyway caught glance at her lilo and it haddevils all over it in very rude positions hence she spent the next week playing on the water on a giant mobile phone.

25. think my worst stupid thing was breaking my ankle and toes on my 1st lesson of tae kwondo oops. don't ask me how i have no idea lol

oh and rosie had a halloween party but the kids went a bit mental with my e numbered green coloured fairy cakes and ended up in the back garden playing football i sent them home all covered in mud as they stared rolling around int he grass, they just ignored me when i said stoppit lol. we dont do at home parties anymore.

i swear disaster follows me lol

Hahahahaha I remember half of these when you told me from when we met up lol, my fave was the salon selectives one!!
xxx

lol so embarrassin when i look at how may people have viewed this thread now everyone knows i'm a complete blonde

 

[Tsia]

when I was about 17 I was starting hanging around with a new group of girls & lads in a pub I worked in as a glass collector. After a shift I sat on the end of their table.
They were all talking about drug abuse and how bad 'E' was and coke.. pills etc..

I wanted to join in.. after a while of listening I didnt want to admit I hadnt done drugs yet.. so I said..

''Well I have done a pill.. but I WOULD NEVER DO an E!!''

The whole table went silent and turned then laughed hard at me..
I laughed along.. til about 5 mins later my friend summoned me to the loo and explained they were the same thing! I have never been so embarrassed in all my life since that day! I was such a dick to comment on something I knew feck all about!


and once when I was about 19.. I was wearing a white satin skirt.. went out to a club.. and my fave tune came on. I was a little tipsy and jumped up on the 5ft high speaker after I saw another girl get off it.. and after giving my bootie a good old shake to the chorus of the tune.. next thing I remember is waking up in a daze with random strangers trying to pick me up off the floor. I was covered in blood all over my legs.. turns out I had lost my footing and I had done the splits on the corner of the speaker on the way down.. my satin skirt had turned RED by the time the bouncer got me to the front doors of the club to go to A&E. I didnt go.. I just went home.
Next morning My lady bits wer cut and so badly bruised.... god knows.. I never got on a speaker EVER again!
I was in agony for about two weeks.. never told my mum either. I was scared I wouldnt ever have kids cos of it! I never even went to the docs! I WAS SO EMBARRASSED.

 

[mrscookie]

my admissions to be blonde
1. yes i did crash my moped looking in the co-op window at myself singing salon selective song, crashed into back of a car. cutting my leg, i was going for a perm although i have curly hair.

2. while in hospital after the crash i was looking out the window and saw a herd of cows out the window, i shouted the nurses and the cows disapeared they thought i was hallucinating and put me in a side room, they later found out they'd escaped from the farm next door.

3. i died my hair black and it went green when i was 16, ruined my mums best towels

4. i got suspended from school for playing truant.

5. i wore a knitted mohair jumper for the end of school disco (prom) cos a few certain people told me it was trendy.

6. i sold something of my cheating ex and ran off with the money shared it with some friends and went off on a drinking bender. to get him back haha.

7. i met someone got engaged and divorced in 1 yr when i was 21, there is more to that but cant write it on here.

8. i stole a tree from selston golf course and used it as a xmas tree.

9. i set fire to a mans chest with a lighter in a night club on his stag do, (it stank).

10. i tipped ice down someones top from a wine cooler in blackpool but the ice was melted lol (sorry nic) x

11. i flashed my boobs out of a blackpool hotel window (nic did too),

12. i've been burgled 3 times but only once had something pinched.

13. i had a dog food fight when drunk with one certain person, and it was in someone elses house.

14. i climbed up a stage at a nightclub performance act to get a light from the fire breather and nearly got thrown out the club.

15. i got so drunk on vodka by accident i stood on my front doorstep to get fresh air fell face forward into the grass and had to be helped into the house and put into bed by my next door neighbour,(hence i dont drink vodka anymore only to get trolleyed.)

16. i went to a job interview last yr but got petrol all over me 10 mins before the interview and didnt have time to go and change and to top it off i forgot my purse and had to give my address etc to the kiosk woman and if things werent bad enough when i pulled out the junction and had petrol on my shoes and my foot slipped off the clutch and flew into the middle of the road stalled the car nearly causing a crash. i apologised to the interviewer about stinking of petrol and found it funny and gave me the job.

17. in june 2007 to april 2008 i had about 10 job as i didnt like them for one reason or another.

18 . i thought roe caviar was fish sperm

19. i thought euro tunnel went to ireland

20. went for the wknd in dublin on the flight just before we took off i glued my false nail back on and stunk the whole plane out with super glue.

21. i thought cardiff was in scotland and carlisle in wales

22. when i went on hol a few yrs ago i got a trip mixed up and instead of going on the catalan senation choclate tsting trip i ticked the wrong box catermaran sensation trip and ended up on a bloody sailing boat with a net a foot above the sea (i've never been so scared in my whole life i tell ya) it sailed into the middle of nowhere in the ocean with a load of german weirdo's, trying to keep myself to myself with rosie intow they had a bbq on this boat, rosie had a plate of rice and alot of ketchup and as we sat at the front of the boat a gust of wind blew the plate out of her hand covering a load of germans at the back of the boat with the contents of her plate.

23. i went for a walk on the same holiday only to get caught in a rainstorm as we walked up this long road it started flooding, rosie said "why can i smell poo" yes it was the drains over flowing we only had flip flops on. nice....

24. same holiday rosie went to the shop bought a lilo everyone was pointing at her laughing so told her to come out the pool and gave a lecture to her to behave as swimming pools can be dangerous etc etc. anyway caught glance at her lilo and it haddevils all over it in very rude positions hence she spent the next week playing on the water on a giant mobile phone.

25. think my worst stupid thing was breaking my ankle and toes on my 1st lesson of tae kwondo oops. don't ask me how i have no idea lol

oh and rosie had a halloween party but the kids went a bit mental with my e numbered green coloured fairy cakes and ended up in the back garden playing football i sent them home all covered in mud as they stared rolling around int he grass, they just ignored me when i said stoppit lol. we dont do at home parties anymore.

i swear disaster follows me lol

Hahahahaha I remember half of these when you told me from when we met up lol, my fave was the salon selectives one!!
xxx

lol so embarrassin when i look at how may people have viewed this thread now everyone knows i'm a complete blonde

Its a good thing I think it shows you have a great sense of humour! We used to have such a laugh, ANNDDYY PEETTERRRS!! Hahaha, and of course, who could forget the gorgeous Jimmy
Whenever I see him on TV it reminds me of that day, and our hot sausage baps! lol xxx

 

[andbabymakes3]

...what a derwyn

I'm guessing from this turn of phrase that you live near Oswestry! Not heard this for years

 

[andbabymakes3]

Not long after passing my test I crashed my car - driving down the high street, checking out the hot boys with no tops on - drove straight into a row of parked cars.

I thought seahorses were mythical, and when I saw them for the first time in an aquarium (when in my 20's) I screamed 'Oh my God, I thought they were pretend' and then burst into tears. Not entirely sure why I cried...

Walking home from the pub I worked in (when I was about 19) me and the two guys I worked with decided to swap clothes...it had been a fancy dress party...and we ended up going back to theirs and drinking til we passed out...I woke up next to a 6 foot rugby player wearing my catwoman costume...and I was dressed as a can of John Smiths.

I got fined by the police in Spain - driving along on an insanely hot day, I had my skirt over the steering wheel (it was really hot and I wanted the fan to cool my legs down) - as I went round the roundabout the breeze caught my skirt and blew it over my face. The police were NOT amused.

I nearly got arrested for car surfing - again, in Spain - me and a few friends driving along the beach very early in the morning (after a looooong night out) - and the game was, my friend Kate drove and we took turns to stand on the boot of her 306cc and car surf - whilst singing Surfin USA. What a tool.