Freaking Out!

[BigFoot1980]

Hi,
I am going crazy since yesterday. My period was a week late this month and its never late. I got my hopes up and even when my second neighbour announced that she is pregnant I was fine. In my mind I was thinking what if we are both pregnant at the same time, that would be nice. Then yesterday spotting started and today AF in full force.

I am having a complete break down. I have no solid plan to work on. I don't know what I am going to do. I suddenly feel completely lost and helpless.

I don't have anyone to talk to. My husband is not ready to go through IUI or IVF. He thinks we should just try naturally.


I am sorry for the long rant. I just need some suggestions on what to do. Any advice would be welcome. If only I had a plan of some sort.

Our details are:
I have a tilted uterus no other known problems, tubes fine and ovulate regularly. Never seen a BFP apart from my dreams

DH has had 3 SA done. First two were normal but not great and the last one was a bit on the lower side. Low motility.

Haven't had any fertility drugs apart from one clomid cycle. FS won't prescribe Clomid for me because I ovulate on my own.


Thanks in advance for any suggestions and also for reading the long rambling post

 

[MrsR32]

Hi,

I'm sorry you're feeling so lost, I understand completely about wanting a plan to give you something to concentrate on.

Would your DH be willing to put a deadline on trying naturally? Maybe you can agree between you that you'll start enquiries into IUI/IVF if you've not fallen naturally by a certain date? At least that then gives you a plan of sorts.

Alternatively, and this depends where you are, if there's a waiting list for funding, maybe you could get DH to agree to get yourselves on the waiting list but keep trying naturally in the meantime - then by the time he feels ready to think about treatments, you'll be near the top of the waiting list.

I think you need to get DH to understand that 3 years is a long time already and not much will change without intervention. He also needs to know how this is affecting you, don't suffer in silence.

I hope you get somewhere soon, good luck x

 

[MillieMoo]

I'm really sorry your feeling so low. I know how it feels when AF shows he ugly face when you think she's gone away and then boom!! She arrives and its just sh*t!

I agree with MrsR32, you should set a deadline to trying naturally and then at least you know what you're working towards. I really hope you can talk your OH around.

 

[RebaRezzelba]

Hi - i would get on the IVF waiting list - i am currently on one and its a year wait - I dont want IVF so the FS said when it comes around I can defer it for a year or two even - after another 2 years of trying I might decide IVF is the only option - but at least Ill be on the list and wont have another yr to wait.

Get some vitamins for your hubbies sperm too - that will help, its usually 3 months for sperm to improve.

Have you been trying for long?

 

[RebaRezzelba]

Sorry I see on your signature that you've been TTC for 3 years - Im 2 years myself and its hard - def get on an IVF waiting list.

 

[Dancingkaty1]

hi know how you are feeling....my husband too has low sperm count & motility...do you mind me asking what all the results were??? he has been taking fertile aid 4 men & has lost 2 & a half stone in a few mths & his sperm result which we got back today went from 17 to 21 million...also the motility went up too def try & get him to take some kinda vitamins & no more baths lol.....my DH loves baths but realises my dream of having another baby so badly so he is very good & has showers now
You say you had 1 round of clomid...why are you not able to have more cycles using it then?? i too am ov fine apparently altho i only have the one ovary & it has polycysts on...i hope my specialist next week gives me clomid....have heard sooo many woman can take it even if they ovulate to increase the number of eggs that are produced ... as long as you are given the warnings of multiple births i dont see why it is a prob...

I really do think that you need to explain to your DH that 3 years off ttc with no BFP's is not a good thing & yes it may still happen ( & hopefully!!!) but I would advise to go on the waiting list for IUI & give that a go first, im going to ask my specialist next week about clomid & IUI....we have been ttc for 13/14 mths now & seeing as DH has low sperm count I think IUI could work 4 us (& you!) as it helps the spermies get to where they need to be...takes alot of the hard work away from them....

good luck & let us know how u get on & what your DH says.....xxx

 

[BigFoot1980]

hi know how you are feeling....my husband too has low sperm count & motility...do you mind me asking what all the results were??? he has been taking fertile aid 4 men & has lost 2 & a half stone in a few mths & his sperm result which we got back today went from 17 to 21 million...also the motility went up too def try & get him to take some kinda vitamins & no more baths lol.....my DH loves baths but realises my dream of having another baby so badly so he is very good & has showers now
You say you had 1 round of clomid...why are you not able to have more cycles using it then?? i too am ov fine apparently altho i only have the one ovary & it has polycysts on...i hope my specialist next week gives me clomid....have heard sooo many woman can take it even if they ovulate to increase the number of eggs that are produced ... as long as you are given the warnings of multiple births i dont see why it is a prob...

I really do think that you need to explain to your DH that 3 years off ttc with no BFP's is not a good thing & yes it may still happen ( & hopefully!!!) but I would advise to go on the waiting list for IUI & give that a go first, im going to ask my specialist next week about clomid & IUI....we have been ttc for 13/14 mths now & seeing as DH has low sperm count I think IUI could work 4 us (& you!) as it helps the spermies get to where they need to be...takes alot of the hard work away from them....

good luck & let us know how u get on & what your DH says.....xxx

Thank you all for taking the time to read my post and share your advice. My DH had a count of 20 million but motility was 10 percent. He has been taking Maca and Wellman tablets. He doesn't take baths ever and I have him wearing boxers now

One cycle on Clomid was prescribed by my previous FS. After that we moved and my new FS told me that after Lap& Dye she would prescribe me Clomid if my tubes are open. However when I went back she had changed her mind. She basically said that since I ovulate on my own I don't need it and that we should look into IUI or IVF. Also in my area we don't zero tries for IUI or IVF and have to go private. I am tempted to take Clomid on my own. (Any thoughts?)

As for my DH, well what he says is that if we are meant to have children we will and he doesn't want to make it his life purpose. Don't get me wrong he does want kids but he doesn't want to get hung up on it. If I push him he will probably go for IUI. When ever I want to discuss IUI he gets all evasive. I will try to talk to him again when he is in a more talkative mood. So lets see what happens.


Thanks for your replies. I am feeling much better now.

Also I am going to make a plan tomorrow. I am going to make some dietary changes and other things I can do. If I come up with one, I will share it with you guys

 

[woowoo]

Making a plan sounds like a good plan (I hope that makes sense?!)

I hope everything goes well for you x

 

[BigFoot1980]

Making a plan sounds like a good plan (I hope that makes sense?!)

I hope everything goes well for you x

Does make sense
I hope I do come up with a plan and don't go into depression again.
Thanks

 

[kairzh7]

My sister-in-law conceived her first with IUI and after the procedure they sent her home and told them to do the BD again that way they could have conceived naturally they don't know, but since she obviously had to be ovulating at that time it could have happened either way. In her case the problem was her not him. Anyways if it is a mental thing for DH, maybe that would be something you could suggest.

A website that I have gotten a lot of info off of and has a "fertility diet" on it that you might want to look at is https://www.naturalfertilityinfo.com/ That might help you come up with a plan.

I have 2 more months of trying on Clomid (if this cycle ever ends) then I plan to do the fertility cleanse and take a month off. I'm also going to look into accupuncture. My mom's brother-in-law practices it and has apparently had some success with treating infertility. I am going to talk to him and try to find someone local that knows what they are doing. Anyways that is my plan, hope it gives you some ideas.

 

[BigFoot1980]

My sister-in-law conceived her first with IUI and after the procedure they sent her home and told them to do the BD again that way they could have conceived naturally they don't know, but since she obviously had to be ovulating at that time it could have happened either way. In her case the problem was her not him. Anyways if it is a mental thing for DH, maybe that would be something you could suggest.

A website that I have gotten a lot of info off of and has a "fertility diet" on it that you might want to look at is https://www.naturalfertilityinfo.com/ That might help you come up with a plan.

I have 2 more months of trying on Clomid (if this cycle ever ends) then I plan to do the fertility cleanse and take a month off. I'm also going to look into accupuncture. My mom's brother-in-law practices it and has apparently had some success with treating infertility. I am going to talk to him and try to find someone local that knows what they are doing. Anyways that is my plan, hope it gives you some ideas.

Thanks, I have looked at the site and it looks useful. Your plans sounds excellent. I am interested in acupuncture and may look into that but needles scare me a little. Also if you don't mind me asking what do u mean by fertility cleanse?

 

[BigFoot1980]

Sorry! just found the fertility cleanse on the web site you mentioned. Thanks will look into that.

 

[bek74]

Hi,

Our details are:
I have a tilted uterus no other known problems, tubes fine and ovulate regularly.

My friend has a tilted uterus and was told to raise her bottom half up during sex. She would have pillows under her to tilt her body to help the sperm swim in the right direction.
She has conceived 3 children, not sure it is because of this reason or just good fortune, but it couldn't hurt by giving it a go, with hubby's slow swimmers they may need all the help to guide them in the right direction.

Good luck