Frightened my memorial wont do justice

[Rainstar]

Hey everyone,

Everything feels so unreal right now the past 3 weeks feel like they have lasted forever and my mmc feels like it happened much longer ago. Feel qutie racked with despair and guilt and finding it difficult to move on.

Holding a memorial tomorrow with a few friends but not my partner as he will not come. I'm trying to understand where he is coming from but i'm upset that he wont come, if not for himself for me. I dont want to sound selfish but it has ripped us apart in so many ways, although also brought us closer over some things. I just wish he was coming to pay tribute.

I'm scared my memorial wont do justice to my little one but i cant leave it any longer, it even feels like it cant ever do justice when daddy isnt there. I'm sure in the future he will come with me to the place i have chosen (beautiful outdoors location) and it will be special but it just hurts right now.

I just want it to be perfect but that feels so far away

 

[Sovereign]

Hope it goes well hun. I'm thinking about you

 

[Chilli]

I'm glad you're doing this. I just had OH and parents and was saddened that others didn't feel the need to acknowledge the end of my child's little life. It really helped me and I hope it will make you feel much better. Cannot imagine why your OH isn't coming, but then never do understand men!!?? I'm sure he means no harm, but hope he never lives to regret it. I really hope things go ok tomorrow. Big hugs