Fuck you, you fucking fuck. . .

[xodemixo]

Girl i would tell him not to even bother to see the baby. Im not sure if this is ur first or second. But one weekend a month! Thats a slap across the face. Babies are hard work especially new borns! You can do it on ur own girl, dont settle for something like that a real man will come along.

 

[Mummy1995]

I'm going to disagree in a way. I think he and your little girl deserve a chance to have a relationship as a father/daughter relationship is so so important and can have a huge impact on their future relationships with men. However I do think it should be one chance and one chance only. Don't let him mess you both about, imo no dad is better than a crap one so he needs to be all in or all out! It's not worth the stress and upset to let them walk in and out with countless chances, trust me I know from my own experience.

I really hope he sorts himself out though x

 

[mayb_baby]

He needs to grow up but many don't until the baby is born, my OH was 1000x better when he was here. You don't need the stress now so I wouldn't bother texting or contacting him, he should be the one chasing you.
Again huge

 

[zilla]

If you don't have him there when she is born, you might regret it in the future as you're depriving him of that one special once in a lifetime moment, just because he's pissed you off a little bit.
If he's away at university, then maybe he's trying to get qualified so that when he graduates, he can give you and LO the best that he can then...?
Is there any reason why he chose to move 4 hours away - is it the best for what he wants to study? If so then don't be too hard on him - he might just be trying to sort out a good future for the three of you.

 

[MummyMana]

I gotta agree about having him there for the birth. Being there for the birth will help him bond with the baby which will mean he's more likely to want to see her more whilst at uni. Of he's not there he might feel pushed out which will make him even less likely to want to be there for you both.

 

[AirForceWife7]

I don't know, the way I'm gathering things it seems like he doesn't even want to be there :shrugg:

If that's the case, you shouldn't have to beg him to come. I'm usually all for fatherly bonding, but this guy seems to just dip in and out. You and baby need stability. This is one of the most important moments in your life, and luckily you know what is best for you and baby.

You'll make the right choice I'm sure!

 

[Mummy1995]

I agree ^ I think you should choose what is best for you when it comes to the birth. I personally didn't give a shit about fob feelings in terms of being there. You will be in a very vulnerable position so you only want people who you know will 100% support you and you can rely on. In my opinion I think you'd regret it more of he was there and then turned out to be a dead beat. Knowing you've had to share the most amazing time of your life with an arsehole. But of course the decision is yours! I didn't tell fob anything til I'd given birth and had a cuddle and then allowed him to come the day after I was discharged from hosp. But we weren't even civil at that point. And now he's not involved at all through his own choice and I'm sooooo glad more than anything ele that I didn't allow him to ruin my memories of her birth. Selfish or not I don't care x

 

[LavaPanda]

Thanks girls. To be fair, about the birth it all depends if he can make it. If I go into labour after 11pm he'll have to wait till 6am to get a train and I doubt he'll get his arse up for that, it's then a three hour train journey and then half an hour in a taxi from train station to the hospital so chances are. . . He's not going to make it.
Either way I'm not holding my breath. I'm just doing things as they go now. There's no point in planning because I'm guessing 9/10 times it never plays out how you expect. But your support has been phenomenal and I can't thank you enough