GCSE in Sex?

[Aidan's Mummy]

With regards to teenage pregnancy. I think a lot of niave young girls see it as the easy way out. A small minority will do it to get a house etc. Which I find sad tbh. When I took Aidan into a gcse childcare group to show them how to bath a baby. All I got was aww I want one. These girls were 14 and it shocked me they could be so niave but then again they are young and have no real concept of what it is like to be a mum. Let alone a young mum. Juggling being a mum with your education etc is harder than most girls would ever imagine.

ETA: Before anyone thinks I am slating teen mums. I am one myself I fell pregnant at 16. I just find it sad because I know how hard it is. I just want to shake them and tell them to wait. I would beg a girl to wait if it made a differance. I have got to where I want to be so far Uni and everything but god it has been the hardest time in my life.
And I have no idea how to have sex with a woman either
x

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I don't think there should be a GCSE in it, but sex education is the majority of schools is absolutely pants. It needs to cover more subjects in more detail. The focus is always on hetero relationships. Do teachers and parents not realise that 1 in 10 teenagers has feelings towards a member of their own sex? Should they not be taught that its ok to feel that way? There was NO information at all whilst I was at school about how to have safe sex with another woman - Luckily I only had one partner before my OH, but a few of my friends caught a few things because they didn't KNOW they could catch something. We were totally clueless, and that, imo, is wrong.
At the minute though, teenage pregnancy is a whole different ballgame because its 'normal' for a teenage girl to have a baby now I have nothing against young mums and I know a few who are fantastic mums but I do think the world has turned upside down

That is such a good point, i wouldn't have a clue on how to have safe sex with a woman

I am very surprised that nothing is covered when it comes to same sex relationships, especially since civil partnerships.

 

[Tegans Mama]

That is such a good point, i wouldn't have a clue on how to have safe sex with a woman

I am very surprised that nothing is covered when it comes to same sex relationships, especially since civil partnerships.

Exactly, I only now how to have safe sex with a woman now because I googled it. I had no idea what a dental dam was (as I'm sure a few of the women on here don!) and didn't BELIEVE you could catch STD's through oral sex.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Ok I don't have any idea what a dental dam is

x

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I didn't know what a dental dam was, do now thanks to google. I am shocked at how much is taught about condoms (including how to put one on a cucumber) yet there is nothing about dental dams.

 

[Tegans Mama]

See?
Not the best of descriptions, but a dental dam is a piece of latex about 10 inches long by 6 inches wide. Its made of the same material as a condom, and is placed over the vagina during oral sex so no bodily fluids are swapped.
I don't think I know a single teenage gay girl who knows this - in fact I'd bet 50% of the gay women I know don't! And then they wonder why STD's are rife on the gay scene.

 

[Tegans Mama]

I didn't know what a dental dam was, do now thanks to google. I am shocked at how much is taught about condoms (including how to put one on a cucumber) yet there is nothing about dental dams.

Me too, and the same goes for gay (male) sex. No one says you need to use a condom, for penetrative AND oral sex, and the same applies for any other sexual contact. IMO its ridiculous.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

Wow I never knew that. That should defianlty be part of sex ed. Gay couples need as much info on safe sex as straight couples. It's shocking they wouldn't educate both sexualities properly.
xx

 

[Dopeyjopey]

It's not like only gay women should use one - straight men.should too! I know a lot of girls who have been in gay relationships and have actually heard them talking about not needint to worry about catching anything. Quite concerning that sex education can be putting peoples' health at risk by being so inadequate!

 

[Tegans Mama]

It is hugely concerning. I would like my children to grow up in a generation that provides adequate information for everyone, not just your average straight boy/girl. I was told I didn't need a smear because I'm gay!!! WTF?!?!?!?! I am just as likely to develop cervical cancer as any other woman!! Its disgusting.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

i hope that wasn't a health professional!

It's no wonder there is so much prejudice in our society when it is essentially encouraged through the absence of certain topics in our education system. I will be proud to teach albert about the diversity of the human race and know it will make him a better person!

 

[Tegans Mama]

Yeah it was a doctor after I had Tegan.

Exactly my point. Teaching people from a young age that being gay or lesbian is normal will help stop homophobia in schools - people thought myself and my closest friend (who was also gay) were 'freaks' and we got a lot of crap in school for it. It would be nice for people to just accept someone as they are and move on!

 

[Dopeyjopey]

Did you complain? He or she needs to be struck off.

Asexuality should also be covered as there are so many teenagers who believe they are 'freaks' because they just aren't attracted to anyone, male or female. Especially due to our society being so sex orientated.

 

[Tegans Mama]

Yep. Everyone is different. You shouldn't have to put yourself into a category anyway, sexuality is fluid. It changes all the time.

There is so much more the schools could be doing to give our kids a good start in life.

 

[Dopeyjopey]

That's a really good way to put it. I class myself as straight but as it is someone's personality i'm attracted to i could never rule out being with a woman.

In general i think schools need to be more liberal and parents need to stop thinking that knowledge is bad for our children. Unfortunately i doubt it will ever happen.

 

[PeanutBean]

I guess the sex ed thing is that it mostly covers pregnancy with isn't relevant to gay couples. That's not a good thing though! It certainly should cover sexual health for all kinds of relationships and I think should cover relationship health too - respect, abuse, resources for support etc.

Heather on your point on teen mums I want to add an additional perspective. I think it's ok for 14 year old girls to want to have babies. It's hard and they may not realise how much, it's hard at any age. It's super hard to do it while pursuing education. You know I'm a high achiever and want all girls/women (boys too) to go far in education and have all the opportunities to have exciting and/or well paid careers. But it's still ok to want kids at a young age. Some women want to be mums for their career, iykwim. The social and indeed biological pressure on women is vast and I think it's as ok to feel that at 14 as 34 or 54. That girls have sufficient education about motherhood and the diversity of challenges it brings is key. But if they still want kids early they should be allowed (not to break the law, 16+). They are fertile and in the past very young girls would be brides and mothers (right or wrong in those social circumstances). I don't know if I'm making sense, on my phone so hard to read back, but as a society we should do all we can to educate and support and then be flexible about people's decisions.

 

[Miss Wright]

Totally agree that sex Ed should cover gay/lesbian sex too. I think it's far too biological and focuses on reproduction and periods rather than relationships. I may be wrong but aren't schools bound by some sort of government legislation which prohibits them from 'promoting homosexuality' I'm sure this used to be the case bur I'm not sure if this has been amended. I think it's absurd.

 

[PeanutBean]

That was section 28 which was repealed a few years ago. As an aside, our current equality minister voted against the repeal. No much hope for equality undercthis government.

 

[Aidan's Mummy]

I agree PB they need to be supported and educated. I don't mind they have a desire to have children. The thing that worries me is they think it's so easy. And when I tell then what it's like to be a mum they seemed shocked at how had it sounds and it puts them off. Years ago 14 year old like you said were married and had children. But now I think they should wait a little at least until 18. Get most of their education out of the way and then if they still want a baby. Go for it. I only want that because I know how hard it is iynkiwm?
xx

 

[PeanutBean]

I totally understand Heather, you know I do. I was 29 when I had my first because of education. But I think sometimes in the teen debate people (in general, not you) can be rather unsympathetic and cynical.