Getting married before living together .

[Georgie90]

…has anyone done that?!

Me and my friend was having a discussion about it at the weekend, and I wanted other people’s opinions on it. I don’t know. I don’t think you really know someone until you live together…

 

[porkypig]

we got married before living together and although you might not know their little habits as such, i dont believe that you don't know them or know them considerably more if you live together, especially if youve been with them a long time before moving in, like we did, got together in 2002 and got married and moved in 2007 xxx

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

I think you need to live with someone .... its the domestic arguments that are the worst lol regardless of wether you love someone or not .. finding out they are a slob is still testing..
i think its just important and personally i don't think you REALLY know someone till you live with them

 

[MissyMojo]

i kind of did this - i had my own place and my oh stayed with me every weekend and leave he got from the army - until we were married we didnt live together full time - it was a steep learning curve for us both once we were married and assigned quarters

 

[~KACI~]

I think you need to live with someone .... its the domestic arguments that are the worst lol regardless of wether you love someone or not .. finding out they are a slob is still testing..
i think its just important and personally i don't think you REALLY know someone till you live with them

Agree with this

 

[Pyrrhic]

Personally it's not for me. The domestic side of life often causes the most friction and I do think it is important to live together first.

Tbh though after my experience I wouldn't marry someone unless I'd been with them probably 5 years or more. The longer you're with someone the better you get to know them.

 

[Strawberries]

It's not for me. I think you need to live with someone and know what they're really like before you commit your life to them. Plus it would feel weird to me going to a different house than my hubby most nights

 

[Laura2919]

I think I would of had to have lived with them in order to be married. You dont know how someone behaves or what they are like until you live with them.

 

[Sophiiie]

i'm fairly sure that if i'd married my OH before we lived together, then we'd have been divorced within the month some of his habbits have taken years to get used to, and I didn't know about any of them during the 2 years we were together before we lived together x

 

[MrsBandEgglet]

I personally think it was essential for OH and I to live together before getting married but I respect that some people feel differently, I just know for us it wouldn't have been a wise decision. My aunt got married before she lived with her ex husband and he turned out to be a brute of a man who broke her nose and destroyed her self-esteem. Obviously not all people are gonna turn out like that but she unfortunately did end up regretting her decision. Saying that, he may very well have been fine with her even whilst they were just living together xx

 

[Kelz22]

No I havnt and wouldnt lol.I would reather get to know the person and live with them for a while to see what they are like to live with before marrying them.You dont really know what a person is like untill you live with them.xxx

 

[jackiea85]

I'm very glad I lived with my OH before I married him! I knew what I was in for! x

 

[porkypig]

I think you need to live with someone .... its the domestic arguments that are the worst lol regardless of wether you love someone or not .. finding out they are a slob is still testing..
i think its just important and personally i don't think you REALLY know someone till you live with them

its testing, but like dogs, they can be trained!!!! ha ha!! im sure my little habits and ways test/annoy my dh too, but as long as theyre not hurting me or serious then i think you can work with it, if you want to that is xx


i suppose for me, it was a little different a i didnt have that option of living together, as it would have been frowned upon in my family (Italian and catholic) but i can definitlry do see the pluses of living togther first. the good thing was that after we got married, we had all that to look forward to, moving in, making our own home etc, instead of just having an amazing wedding day, and going back to normal again the next day. It was difficult to begin with, but i do believe that if you love someone, you can overcome these 'annoying' habits they might have xx

 

[rubywoo77]

my husband and I never lived together before marriage for religious and cultural reasons, so I really don't know any different - I agree with all the other ladies that you never really know someone until you live with them.

 

[lousielou]

I didn't live with my first husband before we got married. Big mistake. As soon as we were under the same roof, I realised he was an arse. We split up two years later.

 

[TattiesMum]

As an oldie I had to LOL at this thread .... back in my day (and at 45 I'm hardly in my dotage ) the debate was entirely the other way around I don't think, long term, that whichever way you choose to do it makes any difference to whether a marriage survives or not It's just down to personal preference

I was a bit of a rebel and did live with my 1st Husband before we got married ... we still got divorced. My younger sister also lived with her future husband before marrying though and they are still together.

Likewise my elder brother and sister both got married to their spouses without living together first .... one celebrated their 26th anniversary last week and the other got divorced the same year as me.

 

[leeanne]

I agree...you don't truly know someone until you live with them.

 

[moomin_troll]

Hell no lol
u need to no what ur living with before u marry them hahaha, altho saying that after he got a ring on me he got lazy lol

 

[nicholatmn]

I'm both ways on this. Traditional because of religion... but you should know who you're going to marry. lol

 

[ShanandBoc]

I think you can get to know someone before you live with them, by observing what they are like at home, towards their mother etc.

But i do agree you find out alot more once you actually do live together. Like how smelly / messy / lazy they can REALLY be haha