getting second hand baby stuff

[Shri]

We can't afford to kit out bubs with all new things so we are grateful for stuff that people pass on to us...but while some of the stuff is great, some of it, I'm surprised people even want to pass it on, because it is either too grubby and old to really be useful, or it is totally useless things that are still in the box (plug in wipe warmer!)

Where it won't cause offense, anything we don't need or want, and which is in good enough condition we can take to the charity shops, but some of the stuff I really don't know what to do with. Seems awful to just chuck it out and I don't want to sound mean, but I'd rather not be given stuff that will take me 10 hours to scrub up just to see if it is usable!

I hope I don't sound ungrateful - I'm just stressing a bit, because there are things we need that we can barely afford that we still haven't got and yet we have piles of stuff that is non-essential but either useless or needs so much cleaning that I feel a bit daunted.

Any one got any advice?
The worst bit for me is it makes me cry because I want the best for baby.

 

[babezone]

ive herd freecycle is good site and all of it is free all u need is a yahoo email address and then join ur local area and u can advertise for certian stuff or people offer and u reply theres usually loads of baby stuff on there hun x x

 

[Bunnipowder]

I know how you feel people were offering me things that I just didnt want because i knew i wouldn't need it. I would tell them thanks but iv already got one, there's no sense in you having 2 things and they'll still feel like they have tryed to help you out!Or simply tell them you dont think you will use it and would they like it back to pass onto someone else! I wouldnt worry because there not going to know if you dont use the things they have gave you!x

 

[nessajane]

Why dont you try some local charity shops they are bound to have some cheap baby clothes in them which are in better condition?

 

[Tootsie]

hunnie i have been too offered lots of 2nd hand bits and like you i accept all greatfully with a smile, take it home check it out and then take anything i'm not going to use thats decent to a charity shop and i dispose of the rest. I also agree though what some people think is decent to them is not fit by someone elses standards.

I can only suggest continuing what you are doing but don't feel bad about throwing stuff away.

 

[Sarahkka]

The things which are new might be able to make you some money at a baby consignment shop. You could apply that cash to what you do need.
Giving you secondhand items that are filthy is rather disrespectful, although I'm sure it was probably more just thoughtlessness. I would not take those things to a charity shop without cleaning them, but I don't think you should have to do that for someone else. I would advertise the items on freecycle or craigslist and just say that they are free but need some TLC. There's bound to be someone who is looking for such a bargain.

 

[brownhairedmom]

I keep getting offers on things too. Like a playpin that's ripped up and sagging because the kids that had it before have been using it as a fort and hanging off the sides of it. And a stained up high chair. I just say no, I'm going to invest in my own.

 

[Shri]

Lol! you've made me feel a bit better about it all. Yes craigslist and freecycle are good options. We are doing pretty good for clothes although since bubs is arriving in winter I have to try to think past all the summery new-born stuff...

The hardest things are car seat, stroller and something for baby to sleep in until big enough for a crib/cot. Those things are harder to feel ok about getting second hand, especially the car seat of course, and harder to clean. I feel like we have to invest in new for those, especially car seat and mattresses.

I'm getting the urge to nest!

 

[Tootsie]

Matresses and first car seats are a deffinate new buy, and you can get both quite cheap if you look around. As for the other stuff if anyone offers you a really decent conditioned one then i'd take it, maybe recover a baby bouncer or pram if you can with new blankets and material.

But my baby will be sleeping in the cot from the get go as i really don't have room for moses basket or swinging crib aswell as cot, pram, car seat, travelcot etc...

 

[Sarahkka]

I know what you mean about the expense of some of these things. I am also quite keen to save the planet by cutting down on buying things brand new, so I have those ethics to contend with, as well.
For me, the car seat is the priority as they won't let baby leave the hospital without an officially approved one. The safety standards are apparently rigorous and update frequently, so a secondhand carseat probably won't work.
I'm budgeting for that new.
I am not doing a sleeper/bucket style seat. It would almost double my car seat cost and if baby is tall like my husband and I, we'll get maybe 3-4 months use out of it.
As for the stroller, I am not going to worry about that until spring. Baby will be born in winter and there is no way I'd try to haul a stroller over ice and snow and slush.
I have decided to opt for an Ergo baby carrier (cheaper than the baby bjorn and I liked the design features better). It will run me about $100 and will let me keep baby close and warm while out and about. Have you considered one of those? It could be a cheaper alternative to a stroller.
I am stuck about the mattress - I have read all these awful stories about nasty chemicals in mattresses off-gassing on poor baby, but the eco-mattresses are NOT cheap. As in about $400 compared to $60. And the off-gassing stuff is controversial information.
It's all a bit maddening. And expensive!

 

[Shri]

I'm with you Sarahkka, the environmental issue is important to us too, which is also a factor and why I get a bit fed up with all the crazy plastic trim that seems to be on everything these days.
As for the mattress, I really want to get an organic one if I can and they are expensive.

but that is a good point about the stroller - we won't need one for a while since bubs is due in december - we have a couple of sling/carrier options too so hopefully that will work. I will have to persuade OH about eh car seat though - we have been given 2 second hand and I feel uncomfortable about both of them, because they are so old basically.

 

[Tootsie]

saftey laws in the UK state that you should never use a 2nd hand car seat, i'm not sure on the laws in th USA though but as you cannot tell if they have never been knocked or worse been in a accident they really say you should always buy first car seats brand new, I think it's different for booster seats for older children.

research it yourself than see if you can convince your OH with the information you find out

 

[Shri]

saftey laws in the UK state that you should never use a 2nd hand car seat, i'm not sure on the laws in th USA though but as you cannot tell if they have never been knocked or worse been in a accident they really say you should always buy first car seats brand new, I think it's different for booster seats for older children.

research it yourself than see if you can convince your OH with the information you find out

We are aware of that factor, the car seats we have been given come from family members who also know that the car seat has to be safe and would tell us if they had been in an accident or even bumped. So it's not so much a case of convincing OH on that front, but more the fact that, if it is perfectly good car seat, only used for a few months and most infant car seats are, it seems so expensive and such an environmental issue to buy new. I don't think he will take much persuading as he is pretty keen on what will be best for bubs of course, but I wish they weren't so darn expensive. The cheaper ones just do seem cheaper too.

 

[Tootsie]

I stand corrected

Still ultimatley it's up to you and your OH. I'm looking at getting a car seat in with the pram i buy (travel system style) killing 2 birds with one stone (as the saying goes) and hopefully getting a good enough deal. As i'm in the UK too i'll deffo be using the pram from the get go as the chance of us getting snow is about a million to one

 

[Beltane]

Toss the yucky stuff and don't feel guilty- Im sure it got plenty of use when it was fresh and new. As for the things you may need, I highly recommend garage sales and yard sales. We get brand new baby stuff- still sealed! I also have found super deals on eBay and in department stores.

 

[brownhairedmom]

I'm getting a car seat from my cousin, but their baby is just a year and a half so it should still fit the safety regulations and I know they would tell me if something was wrong or had happened.

I too want an organic mattress, but I'm extremely, extremely limited on funds right now so the same people as above have one, so I'm taking theirs.

It pisses me off that I can't get everything new. I'm putting my foot down at used clothes though. There is no way I'm putting something on my baby that could have had a diaper leak or spit/thrown up on by someone else. Its one thing when they get older and they're potty trained, but I'm not putting used newborn clothes on her.

 

[armychicmkm]

Don't worry about tossing yucky clothes. If some stuff is really bad it's possible that the person who gave the stuff to you also received the items secondhand. Thing can only be passed around so long before they just have to get tossed. Everything was probably just packed in a box after baby grew out of it waiting to be passed on to the next person...

As for car seat - I'd personally want to buy new. There have been so many new safety regs since the people I know have had kids that they probably wouldn't fit the new laws anyway.

 

[Sarahkka]

Although this is pulling the thread a bit off-topic, I am going to follow the path of one of my best friends who just had a baby and request that any baby gifts not be plastic. Almost all plastic toys contain PVC and I'm trying not to have that in the house. I feel that it will be up for some serious scrutiny soon regarding its safety and babies, just like BPA has recently been.
Another way we are trying to save cash is by buying a crib that converts to a toddler bed. We hope to get about 4 years use out of it, so that helps justify the cost of the more expensive eco-mattress.
Otherwise, I'm all about secondhand everything! Babies outgrow stuff so fast. I don't mind a few new outfits, as they are fun and you want a few special things, but I'm going hand-me-down clothes all the way. I think a proper wash (with a few drops of bleach, if you are really worried) would take care of germ concerns, Rae, but we all have our own feelings about stuff, so respect for your decision even if it's not my own.
I am a self-described cheapo on this topic, but I don't really get spending $40+ per outfit on an entire brand-new wardrobe for baby when they might get a few weeks out of it. It's the Baby Gap-like prices that blow my mind. A few special items, I understand, but the entire wardrobe? It just seems like such a waste of money. I have a definite budget for baby and that budget includes putting money away for school, etc, so I guess my priorities are just different.
To each their own, I guess.

 

[PeanutBean]

Although this is pulling the thread a bit off-topic, I am going to follow the path of one of my best friends who just had a baby and request that any baby gifts not be plastic. Almost all plastic toys contain PVC and I'm trying not to have that in the house. I feel that it will be up for some serious scrutiny soon regarding its safety and babies, just like BPA has recently been.
Another way we are trying to save cash is by buying a crib that converts to a toddler bed. We hope to get about 4 years use out of it, so that helps justify the cost of the more expensive eco-mattress.
Otherwise, I'm all about secondhand everything! Babies outgrow stuff so fast. I don't mind a few new outfits, as they are fun and you want a few special things, but I'm going hand-me-down clothes all the way. I think a proper wash (with a few drops of bleach, if you are really worried) would take care of germ concerns, Rae, but we all have our own feelings about stuff, so respect for your decision even if it's not my own.
I am a self-described cheapo on this topic, but I don't really get spending $40+ per outfit on an entire brand-new wardrobe for baby when they might get a few weeks out of it. It's the Baby Gap-like prices that blow my mind. A few special items, I understand, but the entire wardrobe? It just seems like such a waste of money. I have a definite budget for baby and that budget includes putting money away for school, etc, so I guess my priorities are just different.
To each their own, I guess.

I want to avoid plastic as much as I can too. We've got nothing to buy really except real nappies. Just little bits bedding and bibs really. The travel system we are getting new but luckily MIL is buying it for us. Everything else is coming second hand from my siblings. We don't need any clothes at all. It's good on the wallet but I do feel a little disappointed at not being able to make my mark. We will go all out on the little things we buy and decorating the room instead.

As to the skanky stuff, I can imagine that would be very annoying! Why people think you will use stuff they didn't I don't know and they ought to know if things are worn out. If it's really awful then no-one will want to use it so you should just dispose of it anyway. Are their any fabric recycling places you can take the clothes too?

 

[jnall1965]

We can't afford to kit out bubs with all new things so we are grateful for stuff that people pass on to us...but while some of the stuff is great, some of it, I'm surprised people even want to pass it on, because it is either too grubby and old to really be useful, or it is totally useless things that are still in the box (plug in wipe warmer!)

Where it won't cause offense, anything we don't need or want, and which is in good enough condition we can take to the charity shops, but some of the stuff I really don't know what to do with. Seems awful to just chuck it out and I don't want to sound mean, but I'd rather not be given stuff that will take me 10 hours to scrub up just to see if it is usable!

I hope I don't sound ungrateful - I'm just stressing a bit, because there are things we need that we can barely afford that we still haven't got and yet we have piles of stuff that is non-essential but either useless or needs so much cleaning that I feel a bit daunted.

Any one got any advice?
The worst bit for me is it makes me cry because I want the best for baby.

Freecycle is the way to go, i have been getting loads of stuff for my daughter. All you need is a yahoo email address and the emails will start flooding in.