Girl at work just announced she is pregnant. When will this torture end?

[nicb26]

A few of us all meet up for coffee every Friday, and yesterday one of the girls announced she is twelve weeks pregnant. Aaaarrrggghhh! I know it sounds silly, but all I could think is that she would have conceived her baby about the time I lost mine, and for some reason that is making it so much worse. Plus her and another one who has a baby were going on about being thirsty all the time, needing to pee more etc. I so wanted to say yep, i had that too!, but they dont know about the mc so I just had to pretend I had never been pregnant and had no idea what they were talking about. She then started complaining about having to get up in the night to pee, and that just made me so mad! I know I'm being unreasonable, she is a nice girl and i don't begrudge her her baby, it just makes it so much worse that i am now going to get a week by week account of her pregnancy, and have to watch her lovely baby bump grow and grow, all the while thinking why did it have to be my baby that died? Wish i was super fertile like the rest of my family, but sadly I am not and it could take months and months before i am pregnant again, maybe even years as I am worried there is something wrong.

Ugh sorry i seem to have written an essay! Please someone help me out with some PMA, I am in desperate need of it! Hope everyone else is doing better than me today xxx

 

[sdoon60]

Hi hunni,

Sorry for your loss. I have not suffered a loss but just been told I have PCOS and may not conceive. My close friend is trying for a baby and my other close friend in the same group has just given birth two weeks ago so my circle of friends is a bit baby mad right now!

I was wondering if you would consider telling them about your MC? Maybe then they will be a bit more sensitive when moaning about getting up to pee, etc. I really understand how you feel about this because whenever I go on FB there seems to be a new mum complaining about how many times they have to get up with their baby in the night and I think to myself... I wish I had a baby to get up to! It must be horrible for you to sit there and listen to the conversation and keeping it all in.

You have conceived once and you will again. Sending dust your way that it happens quickly and you get your bubba. Good luck babe xxxxx

 

[nicb26]

Thanku so much, I really hope u get some good news soon too xx

 

[pandaspot]

Its terrible isn't it, people in my work knew about my mc but they also didn't tell me about the THREE people who had announced their pregnancies! Was a kick in the teeth when I found out Friday. I know they must have felt they were doing it for my own good but it really hurt when I found out by accident

You should perhaps let the people you go for coffee know about your mc. They might be a bit more sensitive towards you and least you can feel like you can join in with the conversation. So sorry for your loss x

 

[SMFirst]

I think it's best if you tell them you've had a MC. My friend is pregnant and I had to tell her about my MC just so she would be a little more discreet about what she says about her pregnancy.

But overall I think everyone knows the feeling of not wanting to hear that ANOTHER person is pregnant - for me I've learned of three acquantances since my MC, and I have a suspicion about a close co-worker and it's tough to hear but I find I get over it quickly and then feel happy for them (it's their turn now but yours will come soon enough!)