Giving a toddler an Ipad to play with is lazy parenting?

[Dezireey]

I think there is a valid argument saying 'unless you experience toddlerhood yourself, don't be too quick to make decisions on what you will and wont do e.g wont give chocolate, wont let them stay up past a certain time etc etc'*

But I do feel that giving a small child something that they can get addicted to on a regular basis actually increases this problem anyway with tantrums/ bad behaviour/ rudeness.

There is a world of difference giving a 5 year old a new toy to play with with push buttons on it. They play with it, they enjoy it, they may even carry it around but visually you will see that usually you can catch their attention more, probably hold a conversation whilst they play with it or their listening skills will be there to some degree. Now give a 5 year old four hours of using an Ipad and you can guarantee that they will find a game or something that requires 100% of their concentration and attention and its got 60 levels that they HAVE to get through, their friends also play it, they NEED to win at super mario level 3 and before you know it this kid is a) refusing to even speak to you even when you are asking some damn well important questions b) concentrating solely on one thing which =lack of awareness of surroundings, which can be dangerous e.g my nephew playing on his tablet whilst also crossing a road and c) they learn bad habits such as ignoring people and that any other toy/ activity pales into comparison now.

I really, truly dont think for one second that I would allow my little boy to use that product to that extent and just because he is a toddler and i cant cope with the tantrum, I would probably give in. I feel so strongly about it, Id rather drop all my shopping in tesco and leave whilst hes writhing about on the floor asking for it, than just give in to that slippery slope of addiction.*

Seriously, I dont want a teenager sitting at my dinner *table staring down, fixated at a gadget whilst his family is around him talking to him and asking him how his day was. Technology may be more advanced, kids may very well need to keep up with things, no harm in progress. But forming good and healthy human relationships are an important part of a childs development. How can a child develop socially *if 80% of their time is spent staring at a screen and not out there with their friends talking, laughing and playing face to face.

 

[Dk1234]

Who would let a toddler sit and do anything for hours?

 

[overcomer79]

Who would let a toddler sit and do anything for hours?

I was going to ask WHAT toddler will sit around and do anything for hours ...hasn't been my experience.

 

[Duejan2012]

havnt read through the whole thread but i dont think there is anything wrong with it as long as its not being used as a babysitter. I let my daughter use mine but we listen to simple songs like twinkle twinkle little start etc some that she learns to sing. I also play songs about the alphabet and numbers. Sometimes i let her watch something she want to watch like dora the explorer or something but even that is kinda educational. I admit sometimes i use that time to get dinner started or something but usually i am there with her singing and dancing right next to her....

 

[readytotry]

I hate the phrase "lazy parenting". It is the judgiest phrase in the judges lexicon. Why not just be blunter and say you think it is bad parenting.

My Lo is only 10months old, so not a toddler yet. But given the time I have spent with toddlers I expect it is very hard to be a "lazy" parent to a toddler without being neglectful.

 

[babybrums]

I'm guilty. I bought my nephew a Nabi for Christmas/2nd birthday. In my defense his parents asked me to (although I did suggest it). He plays on their iPhone and iPod all the time. Maybe too much. He knows how to unlock it, navigate to his favorite movies and play them, etc. While I think they could spend a little more time playing one on one with them, I won't judge. They're raising their child how they see fit. They see technology as an important part of his upbringing. Who knows, maybe one day he'll create something like Facebook only better and be worth millions, all because he played with an iPhone when he was a toddler. Or maybe he'll be a social outcast. No one really knows because these things weren't available when we were kids.

 

[highhopes19]

Not lazy parenting at all!

As a parent I find it really hard to believe that a child has 100% of a parents undivided attention day in day out that would be physically and mentally exhausting tbh.

Isabelle is VERY clingy at the moment and the only chance I get to get anything done i.e cleaning, going to the loo etc is by either sitting her in playpen with a fisherprice app or flash card app on my iPad or wait till she's asleep for 1 hour in the afternoons.

it's just a case of moving with the times... Technology changes and advances

 

[Larkspur]

That's mine, they can have their own when they're old enough. Like 10.

My 10 year old won't be going around with a cell phone. We will provide them with prepaids when they learn to drive. If they want a full dataplan etc THEY can pay for it!

Ha ha, yeah, it will be a pretty standard prepaid phone I should think! I just figure if they're old enough to be going off to stuff by themselves, then I would like them to have a phone so they can call me if they need to. Not so they can spend hours messaging their friends or surfing the internet.

 

[Dezireey]

Who would let a toddler sit and do anything for hours?

Sorry was referring to a five year old, as mentioned in parts of my post.

 

[hel_5]

Who would let a toddler sit and do anything for hours?

Sorry was referring to a five year old, as mentioned in parts of my post.

my 5 year old wouldn't sit still for hours, she likes to get moving and do 'stuff' and when she is engrossed in ANYTHING she doesn't listen to you, a book, arts and craft, the iPad, playmobil, there is no difference and yes both my girls use the iPad, we use it out as last resort and we do use it in restaurants when we have been waiting ages for food and they want to run round, or go somewhere or do anything other than sit and wait!

It is very very easy to sit here and say what you would do when your child is not that age and you are not in that situation xx

 

[ukgirl23]

Little bits here are there are a good thing. You cant play with your child all day realistically. I allow my kids on my phone or laptop for about an hour while I tidy up or take a break I dont feel bad for it. I downloaded learning games for them. My kids can say a few words in manderin thanks to the cberbies website and my son who is currently learning to read finds alphablocks a huge help. I also let them play a few just for fun games. I let them watch tv and take them out to movies too. Im not supermum but I like to think that kids need downtime just as much as we do as adults. Kids are amazing at working technology and it is good for their development to be allowed to explore a bit with it. Im not saying plonk your kid on it all day and go sit on facebook. Im just saying its okay to relax a bit and let them play a bit of angry birds. It wont harm anyone x

 

[ukgirl23]

Also I want to add to the poster who said that playing games causes addiction and bad behaviour... my kids are almost 7 and 5 years old and they have an xbox and ps3 they are allowed to play it daily but not for long and they are very polite. As soon as I ask them to turn it off it's game saved and off wihout an issue. My son is a bit upset if we say no to lego batman after dinner but he's 4 and he loves it so he is right to be upset as soon as I explain why he calms down and finds a toy to play with.

 

[XJessicaX]

I give my toddler an ipad to play with. She asks for it. Her speech at 19 months is exceptional and the games she plays on the ipad are educational. She is already understanding numbers, counting and recognising them when written down. I see no problems with anything educational!

 

[Dragonfly]

I think some especially daily fail need to catch up with the century we are in. We cant just halt forever and never progress. Whilst I dont agree with kids with heads in them all the time as thats what I normally see from children these days, they are given them to shut them up and keep them busy I know parents that do use it for educational purposes. I cant afford one of them but the kids grandparents got the leap frogs for christmas and Alex is liking learning his alphabet. I also go to home ed sits online with William to teach him stuff to. I take part in the learning also. I dont just leave them to it.

 

[aliss]

Like I have nothing else to do and sit and play with my 2 kids ALL day. They need to eat food, they need to not choke on dust floating around their room, and I need to take a shower once in a while. It's 7am and they are all asleep still but I can't vacuum his room when he's asleep in there. Not everything can be done when kids are sleeping.

If, like the olden days, my extended family was available to watch them for a few hours while I got these essential things done, then I would absolutely not use any sort of toy/device to entertain the 2.5 year old but so far, that is no bueno, they will not help.

No, I don't use an ipad, I don't have one. But yes, you are darn right that the Disney channel is on Special Agent Oso when I need to vacuum the house without a toddler jumping up and down on it, breaking it, or when I need to cook dinner!

It is hard to neglect a toddler, when they are yanking on your shirt and yelling for food, I suppose you could ignore them!?!?? LOL....

 

[ktod]

I think people are just scared of new things. The world is constantly evolving, my old school is all computerised - they have no blackboards anymore!! Imagine if our parents had never let us play with contemporary things. Or our parents' parents..we still be chasing a hoop with a stick!!

 

[chell5544]

I think there is a valid argument saying 'unless you experience toddlerhood yourself, don't be too quick to make decisions on what you will and wont do e.g wont give chocolate, wont let them stay up past a certain time etc etc'*

But I do feel that giving a small child something that they can get addicted to on a regular basis actually increases this problem anyway with tantrums/ bad behaviour/ rudeness.

There is a world of difference giving a 5 year old a new toy to play with with push buttons on it. They play with it, they enjoy it, they may even carry it around but visually you will see that usually you can catch their attention more, probably hold a conversation whilst they play with it or their listening skills will be there to some degree. Now give a 5 year old four hours of using an Ipad and you can guarantee that they will find a game or something that requires 100% of their concentration and attention and its got 60 levels that they HAVE to get through, their friends also play it, they NEED to win at super mario level 3 and before you know it this kid is a) refusing to even speak to you even when you are asking some damn well important questions b) concentrating solely on one thing which =lack of awareness of surroundings, which can be dangerous e.g my nephew playing on his tablet whilst also crossing a road and c) they learn bad habits such as ignoring people and that any other toy/ activity pales into comparison now.

I really, truly dont think for one second that I would allow my little boy to use that product to that extent and just because he is a toddler and i cant cope with the tantrum, I would probably give in. I feel so strongly about it, Id rather drop all my shopping in tesco and leave whilst hes writhing about on the floor asking for it, than just give in to that slippery slope of addiction.*

Seriously, I dont want a teenager sitting at my dinner *table staring down, fixated at a gadget whilst his family is around him talking to him and asking him how his day was. Technology may be more advanced, kids may very well need to keep up with things, no harm in progress. But forming good and healthy human relationships are an important part of a childs development. How can a child develop socially *if 80% of their time is spent staring at a screen and not out there with their friends talking, laughing and playing face to face.

Then don't let them sit there with it there is a time and place like all things, when I was a teenager it was the start of MP3 players and I would be quite happy sitting there downloading songs and listening to them all day long given the chance.
But there were certain times when I wasn't allowed to sit there with my headphones dinner table, family events, going out for etc.
When I was about 7 or 8 the first Nintendo 64 came out and we had it and our time was limited to how long/when we were allowed I apply the same rules to my children.

 

[mummylove]

My daughter watches stuff on my iphone at night when she wants to lie in my bed. I dont think its lazy parenting giving a 3 year old a ipad the lo could actually learn stuff.

 

[MrsKyliePaton]

I hate to say it but if you don't start introducing your children to technology at a young age they're gonna end up behind in today's world. Obviously nothing should be used as a babysitter but as an educational toy, it's good. I mean don't you let your LO pay with other toys?

WSS

We got a report home from school a few months back DD1 was 5 at the time and at the bottom of the page it said that she had to work on her mouse control skills as they were poor?! We have an iPad but don't have a computer so don't know how we can improve that 'skill' lol, most things are done by interactive boards and computers in school nowadays.

But in moderation I say it's fine.

 

[robinator]

We were at Target on Wednesday and there was a shopping cart (one of the bigger ones), with two little girls in it, probably around 5/6 years. Each had an iPhone and was watching a movie on her own. I have to admit I raised my eyebrows. When I was that age I loved going shopping with my mom!

Someone will probably say, "maybe they are high needs/excitable/need distraction/what do I know about their situation/whatever" and get on me for this, but what if they weren't? Chances are they weren't, as not everyone is (even though it is popular bnb reasoning - no offense but it is true). I remember when DVD players in cars were coming into fashion and people were like, "what happened to good old family time in the car?". I can understand long car rides - but this was just a trip to Target. It was sad to see two little girls being allowed to tune out the rest of the world for the sake of a couple of electronic gadgets.

From MY POINT OF VIEW.