Guidelines ON BFP Announcements Within Trying To Conceive Over 35

Discussion in 'Trying To Conceive Over 35' started by Wobbles, Apr 5, 2011.

  1. Wobbles

    Wobbles BnB Co-Founder ~ Retired

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    Hi girls [​IMG]

    Trying to conceive can be a frustrating journey for various reasons and so we ask you to please use the forum sections correctly and consider all of the members.

    Whist members are always happy for their forum friends certain circumstances & lower days can be hard when faced with BFPs without the choice to see them.

    You may use The BFP Sticky at the top of this section only to post new BFPs announcements. If you wish to create an announcement thread of your own you may do so HERE and use the sticky to post your link.

    We understand that their are many threads of doubt, uncertainty and discussions on evap lines which are perfectly fine to post ...though please be aware if posting a picture of a pregnancy test/results that are causing uncertainty we do have a pregnancy tests gallery.


    Wobbles x

    [​IMG]

    Ignoring the guidelines within different sections after you have read them may result in your account being made inactive or an infraction/warning being issued to your account.
     
  2. sarahincanada

    sarahincanada Love my lil miracle

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    Hi there, I just wanted to say that I like to see BFP announcements in this section as being the age that we are I find it gives me a hope it will happen to me. Thats just my opinion. If I got pregnant I would want to tell the people in this section so they dont give up hope, but I guess I cant. When its in the main announcement section it gets lost in the crowd as people dont put their age, and honestly I dont go in there as I dont want to read them when Im struggling. Obviously this decision has been made as people get upset when they are having a hard time, I just wanted to have my say :thumbup:
     
  3. mrsdh

    mrsdh Well-Known Member

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    I second that. It gives us a lift when another bfp is announced on this section . I don't ever hardly venture into the other forums such as bfp announcements as I feel more at home in this section with like minded ladies. I think most of us get a little bit more optimistic when we hear of another success story. X
     
  4. Cui

    Cui Trying for #1

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    Maybe if there was one main post in this section where people could put a BFP announcement?
    I can see where it would bother some people, but I like to see people here finally get a BFP and I like to read how they did it.
    I never read the BFP's other than in here so I would miss posts from the over 35's or I would have to see a bunch of posts from 20 somethings which would make me feel extra old and dried up.:dohh:
     
  5. Shelley71

    Shelley71 Well-Known Member

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    I agree that it is important to know when our TTC buddies finally receive their BFPs. Especially for those of us in our 40s.

    I would definitely like a special post in the TTC Over 35 for BFPs. We all count on each other, and if I were to miss someone's BFP because they can't post here, I would be really upset at not being able to congratulate them because I might not see it.

    JMO.
     
  6. FuzzyCaz

    FuzzyCaz TTC#1 35+

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    Totally agree!

    Why not have a sticky BFP post in here, as a compromise.
    No one is forced to click & read!
     
  7. Indigo77

    Indigo77 Guest

    Yes! Please?
     
  8. velo

    velo Well-Known Member

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    Is this guideline for starting a new thread to announce a BFP, or is it possible to mention getting a BFP as a follow up in another thread? For instance when we are discussing various techniques we are trying it is good to know which ones actually worked for other women.

    Also to be perfectly honest as someone trying to conceive #1, I find it harder to see people's profile pictures with babies than I do seeing someone's BFP announcement.
     
  9. sarahincanada

    sarahincanada Love my lil miracle

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    this is a great idea FuzzyTB, lets have a BFP sticky thread in this section, and then those who choose not to read them dont have to. But many of us want to read them, as we have the odds stacked up against us in general so many of us want the inspiration.

    please admin :kiss:
     
  10. Cui

    Cui Trying for #1

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    Me too..on both. :nope:
     
  11. LLbean

    LLbean Well-Known Member

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    Honestly I get so happy when I see someone with a BFP I do not see the problem... if we can't be happy for others its not a good sign. I personally prefer positive threads and uplifting, those that fill you with hope, and what more uplifting than to see a BFP?

    I respect that some people get upset but it's just life, we can't hide inside our homes and not see the rest of the world. I hate the news for instance, yet I can not avoid it. I love to see it on people's signature too. I do think it gives us hope
     
  12. Spoomie

    Spoomie Mummy of 1 & TTCAL

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    Hi velo, I also thought this was the case, but looking at the moderator's initial post here, it seems I am/we are wrong?!

    I also think it would be good to have a dedicated over 35s announcements thread on our board. I hate to sound like an old hag but while sharing the good news of our contemporaries makes me feel uplifted and that there is hope for us yet, reading that a plethora of twenty-somethings (for whom I'm obviously happy!) have good news to share would just make me feel older than I already feel. And believe me, I feel old!!! Personally have never visited the announcements board and TBH I think most people on the site as a whole would rather have the opportunity to post on the board which they frequent rather than on a general Announcements board? I use Over 35s and TTC after loss and these are the people I'd want to share my news with
     
  13. annie32

    annie32 Member

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    I totally agree
     
  14. Cui

    Cui Trying for #1

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    I feel the same way.
    I tried to look through the BFP announcements in the main section today, and the first 4 or 5 got a BFP in under 6 months of trying(and a lot younger than most of us) . Many of us are not only older but have been trying for a lot longer than 6 months.

    If someone thinks reading about an over 35'er getting a BFP gets them down, then just go and wade through a bunch of BFP's in under 6 months of trying while looking for the ones who are 35 and over.
    I'm thrilled for anyone to get a BFP, but making us go through a list like that to find the over 35 BFP's is just cruel.:growlmad:
     
  15. velo

    velo Well-Known Member

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    If people do end up posting any BFP announcements here - it would be nice as some days when I'm down I want to get inspired by others success, particularly ones that have had a longer struggle and are older - it would be good to follow some guidelines:
    - have sensitivity towards the fact others may have been trying a long time. Saying you FINALLY got pregnant after 3 months when your other children were conceived on the first try, is not sensitive.
    - try not to be patronizing - I find titles like "there's hope after all!" annoying unless its a really extraordinary circumstance. Just because you got pregnant effortlessly does not mean I will. (these titles are obviously better used when it is far from effortless) People can draw their own conclusions. Your announcement may give them hope. It may not.
     
  16. sarahincanada

    sarahincanada Love my lil miracle

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    so how do we start a BFP thread in this section and have it as a 'sticky' thread that goes to the top....do we need to message a moderator?

    this clearly is the best scenerio, then people who do not want to see the BFPs dont need to open that thread. but many of us do, and will participate.

    Im going to message the modertator now :thumbup:
     
  17. sarahincanada

    sarahincanada Love my lil miracle

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    so a moderator received my message and said they will have a chat about it, but it might not be a quick decision. so we will wait and see :kiss:
     
  18. Spoomie

    Spoomie Mummy of 1 & TTCAL

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    Well done Sarah. Hopefully they will check out the thread here and understand our reasoning x
     
  19. mumof2and1dog

    mumof2and1dog Well-Known Member

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    Well done sarahincanada lets hope they action your request!

    I haven't been on for a few days and a couple of ladies I've been chatting to on a couple of threads got their bfp's I only noticed as I was checking my unread posts and noticed it on their tickers! So then I had to trawl through the pg forum to find out how/when they found out.

    So my point is that it would be better for us 35+ ttc to have a thread within our own forum as I never go on the other ttc's forum or pg forums. Let's hope so eh moderators xxx
     
  20. Indigo77

    Indigo77 Guest

    We want a sticky thread! :wohoo:
    We want a sticky thread! :wohoo:
    We want a sticky thread! :wohoo:
     

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