Has anyone had people trying to force them into abortion?

[orange-sox]

How do you cope with the constant pressure from people to convince you that abortion is the right thing?

As many of you know my other half is dead set on our only option being abortion.

I've tried to explain to him every single aspect of it, from what happens, to how it will emotionally destroy me. I've finally got it into his thick skull that I will have to sit in front of my doctor (who I have been seeing for depression) and convince her that my mental state will deteriorate significantly more if I go through with the pregnancy, and that an abortion will be mentally better for me... which is bullshit, there's no way my doctor will believe that.

So his answer to that is "So we would have to get a referral from your doc then? Could we not just pay for it? I guess we'll just have to see what happens then"

We are going to talk more when he gets back, maybe see if I can get him to understand a little more about everything.

I love him so much, and I love our baby so much, and I just don't know what to do.

 

[Leanne&Bump..x]

Do what is right for you and your baby..

If you feel ready for this baby, you love your baby and you want to keep your child then dont be forced into anything..you will only end up regretting it hun.

Stick to your guns, if he doesnt stick with you you will ALWAYS have your LO with you.

Hope everything works out hun. Dont do something you will later regret, for nobody!
xxx

 

[xBumpandLaura]

My mother, for a start. My father would have wanted me to have an abortion, but sadly he passed away a month ago. My ex-OH wants me to abort, and so does his family (they are highly religious). The only people who don't want me to have an abortion is myself and my closest best friend. And we're going to stick together, because i could never sleep easy at night knowing i killed an innocent child. I don't think people who haven't been pregnant know how magic it feels to be carrying a life that needs you to survive. does anyone feel that completely bewildering? it's so special But no, i would never abort. never in a million years.

 

[Leanne&Bump..x]

My mother, for a start. My father would have wanted me to have an abortion, but sadly he passed away a month ago. My ex-OH wants me to abort, and so does his family (they are highly religious). The only people who don't want me to have an abortion is myself and my closest best friend. And we're going to stick together, because i could never sleep easy at night knowing i killed an innocent child. I don't think people who haven't been pregnant know how magic it feels to be carrying a life that needs you to survive. does anyone feel that completely bewildering? it's so special But no, i would never abort. never in a million years.

Just wanted to say sorry for your loss.. I lost my Granma when i was 12 weeks, i was soo close to her(lived next door) told her everything.

Well done for sticking to your guns Your little one wil be soo worth it

 

[pinkmac85]

I'm not a Teen as I'm 23 but I was constantly having people tell me "have you considered your options" only because I was in college when falling pregnant. It used to annoy me but I just would say yes I have and I have made my decision thank you very much!
You do what's best for you hun!

 

[graceS]

I no how your feeling, i suffer from depression. I have almost beat it, just have few low days but everyone does this time of year.
My boyfriend and his family were trying to make me have an abortion....texts, phone calls, emails!
I stuck to my guns and i thought its my body, no one can make me made the biggest decsion of my life.
Now me and my boyfriend are back together and everyone is happy.
It takes time...trust me!
Go for my 12week scan next week, and i have never been happier.
xxxx

 

[Sarah-Jane]

If I'm honest hun, you sound like you don't want an abortion at all. If you go through with an abortion then you have to be 100% sure on that decision... and it has to be YOUR decision, no-one elses.
I was in the exact same position as you so I know how hard it is. I never wanted an abortion yet my boyfriend had his heart set on it because he 'wasn't ready'. When I was 9 weeks I put him in his place, I told him I was keeping this baby with or without his support. He was pretty shocked at first to see me standing up for myself and our baby because from the moment I found out, I said I'd abort our baby just to keep him happy so I wouldn't lose him.
I'm now 23 weeks pregnant tomorrow with a little boy and I couldn't be happier if I'm honest. Me n my boyfriend have had our ups and downs and I still wonder if he really wants to be a dad, but at the end of the day he's standing by me. But even if he did walk away, although it would be hard, I would still have been just as happy because I've got my son and he's all I need right now.
Boyfriends come and go, your child will be a part of your life and a part of your heart for eternity and nothing can break that bond between mother and baby.
Please consider your options and don't let anyone pressure you into anything (especially something that you will live with and probably regret for the rest of your life).
Deciding to keep my son was the best choice I ever made, seeing him on both scans, hearing his heartbeat, finding out he was a boy, watching my bump grown, feeling him kick... everything that I wouldn't change for anyone and I know I've got so much more to come when he's born and I can't wait.
Hope everything works out for you hun, and I'm always here if you wanna PM me for a chat. Good Luck xxxxxx

 

[xarlenex]

My dad tried to convince me it was the way to go. I knew better. I must admit, things got so bad at one point i though "Maybe it is right?" but I soon came around, I was jst so emotional from everything going on.

Do whats best for you. Its your life, no one else's.

 

[LongRoadAhead]

Don't let ANYONE make your decisions for you. Your the one who is going to have to live with them for the rest of your life, not them.
If your not 100% sure you want and abortion, then don't have one. You will probably really regret it.
I had so many people telling me to have an abortion, even my OH was telling me to for the first few weeks and I made it so clear that I wasnt, then he finally came around to it and realised hes going to have to grow up and be a dad. Also my Uncle drove from his house 300 miles away just to come here and tell me to get an abortion or Im going to waste my life away bla bla.
But I knew from the minute I knew I was pregnant that I was keeping MY baby and not letting ANYONE force me to do anything.
And just think in worse case scenario..What if you and your OH split up in a few months? Would you be able to live with yourself constantly blaming him for making your decision.
Have a serious think about things sweets before you make any life changing decisons
Xxx

 

[hypnorm]

Not a teen but please dont let anyone force you in to something you are not happy with. It will only make any depresssion worse i think.

How old is your OH if you dont mind me being nosey.

 

[Pyrrhic]

As much as you love your OH, it will never compare to the love you will feel for your child. Relationships come and go, your child will love you and you will love him/her unconditionally and forever.

I would tell him that you are not having one, and that is the end of it. Don't even let him bring it up again. You've heard his side of it enough now.

 

[tasha41]

My parents wanted me to get an abortion. I don't think my mum really did but she honestly has no mind of her own and just does whatever my father says. Anyways I'm really not close with my parents (well not before I was pregnant anyway) and if I was going to get an abortion, I would honestly just take care of it myself and not bother bringing them into it.

So it was painful to be harassed by my mom and dad for probably 3 weeks to get an abortion. And my mom used to go behind my back and talk to my 16 year old sister about it all the time and ask her if she thought I'd get an abortion, which was hurtful of course because my sister obviously didn't need to be involved in those discussions! And even after they realized it wasn't happening, they waited forever to tell my family and my younger brother about it, whereas my boyfriend's parents called up the whole family the day after they found out and told them all about it.

BUT they're finally coming around, my dad is giving us a car and they bought us the crib.

 

[Serene123]

I had exactly the same problem. Rich even threatened to cut her out of me.

It hurts doesn't it?

 

[Stardancer]

You know, this baby is YOUR baby. You bf might not even be around in 5 years time (sorry, but y'know.. that's life), but your baby will be. You cannot go through with an abortion to please your OH, and it is seriously massively unfair for him to be talking like this, he isn't considering YOUR feelings at all... so why are you so quick to consider his?

I was marched - literally, to the hospital to arrange an abortion when I was pregnant at 18 and MADE to convince the docs it was what I wanted. I did it, and it broke my heart, but when they scanned me my baby was already dead. I now have to live with losing my baby through no fault of my own and it kills me everyday - it's been 14 years. If I'd been the one responsible for that baby dying, I don't know how I'd get through each day.

Please please don't do anything YOU personally don't want 100%. PM me if you need to chat xxxxx

 

[fulltimemum]

hi im leanne im 22 due in jan

my dad try to make me abort all my kids i didnt fall pregnant with my son til i was 18 he thinks he nos best for me but he was never there

 

[Laura85]

Reading these threads has really upset me, I can't beleive how many people are told to get abortions!

I was actually shocked to find that my best friends response to finding out I was pregnant was "well....you have 2 options. 1st..abortion! 2nd adoption! because it might be better for the child!... There was no keeping the baby option as far as she was concerned!

I hit the roof, basically I'm a 23 year old married woman and I've been with my husband for well over 7 years now. So as far as I'm concerned the only option for us was to keep the baby.

I wouldn't even consider getting rid of a baby, it's an amazing part of you which you will love very much. As soon as i found out I was pregnant i had about a 10 min thought of OH MY GOD! as it wasn't planned, but that soon passed into a 'WE'RE HAVING A BABY!!!!'

I love my baby more than life it self, more than anything in this whole world and would NEVER let any one make me get rid of it.

I'm so glad that everyone (but my best friend) was happy for us!

But really do think about it, don't make any desicions you will regret.

Good luck to you all!

Laura. xx

 

[princess_x0]

Hey babe.
I hope your ok
I just wanted to say don't let your OH talk you into this. I let my ex talk me into abortion, like you no matter how much I tried to tell him I didn't wana do it, he wouldn't listen. It was suddenly ALL about him..HE would lose the life he had, HE wouldn't beable to do the things he can do now etc etc..So I went through with what he wanted.
And the day came, I had no support from him, he didn't even ask how I was. And then shortly we split, I just couldn't cope with what he had done.
If you do not want this. DON'T LET ANYONE AND I MEAN ANYONE TALK YOU INTO IT.
Coz you will regret it. This is YOUR baby, and YOUR body. You can do what YOU want, stand up for your right! Your OH isn't considering you in any of this! Good luck hun xxx

 

[princess_x0]

Hey babe.
I hope your ok
I just wanted to say don't let your OH talk you into this. I let my ex talk me into abortion, like you no matter how much I tried to tell him I didn't wana do it, he wouldn't listen. It was suddenly ALL about him..HE would lose the life he had, HE wouldn't beable to do the things he can do now etc etc..So I went through with what he wanted.
And the day came, I had no support from him, he didn't even ask how I was. And then shortly we split, I just couldn't cope with what he had done.
If you do not want this. DON'T LET ANYONE AND I MEAN ANYONE TALK YOU INTO IT.
Coz you will regret it. This is YOUR baby, and YOUR body. You can do what YOU want, stand up for your right! Your OH isn't considering you in any of this! Good luck hun xxx

 

[princess_x0]

Oops I didn't mean to post that twice x

 

[princess_x0]

I had exactly the same problem. Rich even threatened to cut her out of me.

It hurts doesn't it?

Oh my toria! That's awful My ex told me 'he would get rid of it for me'
xx