Hello and need little advise please

[Janie66]

Hello all,
New here, aged 43, nearly 44, and TTC, been married for 9 years now, been TTC for 3 years, have two older daughters from a previous marriage, have none with present marriage, hubby has low sperm count and poor motility, so adds to the TTC, but I live in hope still......... Some days I feel like I am too old, every thing I read says 40+ is a hopeless case to get pregnanat , I am currently taking mother to be vitimans and agnus suppliments too, also trying to eat well . I have had a funny couple of moths with my monthlys, last month it came a week early, which i very unsual for me, and yesterday, came on my monthly I think, bang on 28 days, which is my normal timing, but the flow is so light and its dark brown, really weird tbh, has anyone else had this?

thanks for reading
take care
J

 

[FBbaby]

Hi Janie, I am in a similar situation than you, just a few years younger, will be 40 in 2 months. I too have two children from a previous relationship and would love to have a baby with my new partner. We have been ttc for 18 months, I managed to fall pregnant first month to miscarry a few weeks later and since then nothing. We've learnt during that time that my OH has lowish count and low morphology. As for me, I am ovulating each month, but my fertility is very average for my age. We've been told that we can both conceive, but together with our situation, the chances are only in the low percentage. My partner is more laidback about it, has managed to accept that we might never have a child together and is ok with it, I struggle more. I remind myself everyday how massively fortunate I am to have two children already and a wonderful partner who doesn't put pressure on me to give him a child, and I do sometimes wonder whether I am realistic about how a baby could change our next to perfect life, but somehow, ttc is still on my mind most of the time, and I can't seem to set it up to not trying, not preventing mode!

In regards to AF, I think it is nothing to worry about if it comes early or later than expected once in a while. I also do find that at times it is a different colour and the flow can be more or less than normal. I had a dark brown flow the one before this one, not sure why, but it was back to normal, if anything a bit heavier (I have light AF) last time. I too have found that Agnus Cactus really helps me with ovulation.

Good luck in your journey, hope you will get a nice surprise soon.

 

[Juice]

I am 35 and ttc nearly a year now. Something that always gives me hope..and will hopefully give you some too...is the story of my cousin. She & her DH went through years of unsuccessful IVF then she fell naturally at age 40. 6 months ago at age 44 she had her second gorgeous little boy.

NEVER GIVE UP HOPE LADIES

 

[Caterpiller]

Hi ladies, just wanted to add a little nugget, I found that if I have a light flow, I normally haven't ovulated - had an annovulatory month - the only reason I know this is because my temps tell me I didn't ovulate - it sometimes happens. I have had two so far in my 17 month TTC journey - hope this helps allay any fears

 

[mumoffive]

Well i am feeling a bit hopeless about it all. I think ttc 40 plus gets really hard but it can be done..it just takes longer. I conceived my dd when i was 38 and my ds when i was 39 both roughly in the second month. Sadly now though i have had one chemical in my second month ttc and i am currently in my fifth month trying. Everything i read is all about m/c and taking forever to fall pregnant. It all sounds very cruel that you spend months ttc, get your bfp only to have a m/c. I am 42 btw..soon to be 43 and actually, if it doesnt happen soon then i think i may give up.
Anway, everyone is different and there are still plenty of mums and success storied 40 plus. Hopefully you will get your bfp soon. xxx Goodluck xxx

 

[Janie66]

Hi Janie, I am in a similar situation than you, just a few years younger, will be 40 in 2 months. I too have two children from a previous relationship and would love to have a baby with my new partner. We have been ttc for 18 months, I managed to fall pregnant first month to miscarry a few weeks later and since then nothing. We've learnt during that time that my OH has lowish count and low morphology. As for me, I am ovulating each month, but my fertility is very average for my age. We've been told that we can both conceive, but together with our situation, the chances are only in the low percentage. My partner is more laidback about it, has managed to accept that we might never have a child together and is ok with it, I struggle more. I remind myself everyday how massively fortunate I am to have two children already and a wonderful partner who doesn't put pressure on me to give him a child, and I do sometimes wonder whether I am realistic about how a baby could change our next to perfect life, but somehow, ttc is still on my mind most of the time, and I can't seem to set it up to not trying, not preventing mode!

In regards to AF, I think it is nothing to worry about if it comes early or later than expected once in a while. I also do find that at times it is a different colour and the flow can be more or less than normal. I had a dark brown flow the one before this one, not sure why, but it was back to normal, if anything a bit heavier (I have light AF) last time. I too have found that Agnus Cactus really helps me with ovulation.

Good luck in your journey, hope you will get a nice surprise soon.

Thanks FBbaby, yes we do sound alike in our situation apart from I'm older I think it was the agnus cactus thats made my latest period light and dark brown, been googleing if anyone else had noticed their period had changed after taking it, I am normally very regular and middle to heavy-ish in flow, and found a few threads where it has changed others monthlys after taking it, so maybe this isnt the right herbal suppliment for me, I threw it away this morning, I am going to add maca, heard this is getting good results, for women, and 1 for mens sperm count and motility, maybe you should look into it? Good luck in your journey too, I hope you get a nice suprise really soon xxxx

 

[Janie66]

I am 35 and ttc nearly a year now. Something that always gives me hope..and will hopefully give you some too...is the story of my cousin. She & her DH went through years of unsuccessful IVF then she fell naturally at age 40. 6 months ago at age 44 she had her second gorgeous little boy.

NEVER GIVE UP HOPE LADIES

This is so wonderful to hear these kind of stories, about REAL people concieving natrually when older-ish, I had a friend too, who fell pregnant aged 45, she was suprised to say the least, she wasnt even trying, she thought it was just the stress of moving house that caused her monthly to stop,lol, she gave birth to a beautiful girl, very healthy preganacy throughout too, so I know it can happen, and tbh, I thinks its not as uncommon as we think, we just dont hear about it enough. Thanks for sharing this with me Juice, take care xxx

 

[Janie66]

Hi ladies, just wanted to add a little nugget, I found that if I have a light flow, I normally haven't ovulated - had an annovulatory month - the only reason I know this is because my temps tell me I didn't ovulate - it sometimes happens. I have had two so far in my 17 month TTC journey - hope this helps allay any fears

Thanks Caterpiller for that info, I did ovulate this month tho, so I know it wasnt that.... think it was me shoving down herbal tablets thats mucked it up a little, so I have decided to stop taking it, going to move onto Maca, see what this does for me and hubby too

 

[Janie66]

Well i am feeling a bit hopeless about it all. I think ttc 40 plus gets really hard but it can be done..it just takes longer. I conceived my dd when i was 38 and my ds when i was 39 both roughly in the second month. Sadly now though i have had one chemical in my second month ttc and i am currently in my fifth month trying. Everything i read is all about m/c and taking forever to fall pregnant. It all sounds very cruel that you spend months ttc, get your bfp only to have a m/c. I am 42 btw..soon to be 43 and actually, if it doesnt happen soon then i think i may give up.
Anway, everyone is different and there are still plenty of mums and success storied 40 plus. Hopefully you will get your bfp soon. xxx Goodluck xxx

Mumoffive, thanks for replying . I am sorry about the chemical, I know how hard that is on you, I had a misscarrage back in May, I was 11 weeks along, and I got the usal blah blah, i.e my age is a factor in it,it wasnt my 1st misscarriage, I have had 2 before, when i was much younger, like in my 20's...... dont give up too soon, please, they say it can take a year to concieve in younger healthy mothers to be, and for our age group longer, maybe add a few more months to that, so 5 months is not too long, just see it as a long winding road for now, and with each month, you are getting nearer to nurturing that baby that WILL be inside of you , Good luck to you, xxxxxxx

 

[mumoffive]

Thanks for your kind reply. xxxx