Help! I need to put my worries to rest!

[ginamurr]

Ok - so I am now almost 11 weeks. I have had multiple ultrasounds and baby has always looked perfect with a strong HB. Last u/s was at 9+5 and the HB was 170 and the baby was moving around and perfect.

Even with all of that - I STILL can't shake my worries. I am just so afraid that something will happen in the next couple of weeks. My whole family knows I'm pregs since my MIL was dying to tell - so I could only hold off for so long.

This is my 3rd baby, 4th preg (MC in Oct '10) and I am starting to show/bloat and having to wear my smallest maternity clothes.

Why can I not shake this worry?! The chances of m/c now are really low!

Anyone else a TOTAL worrier??? How do I stop!! It is driving me nuts - I just want to enjoy this time. I think my previous miscarried has just caused me to be more concerned. With my other pregnancies, I hardly worried at all.

 

[Waitress]

Hey Gina,

I can't tell you not to worry but I can say I feel exactly the same. I've had 2 scans and they've even described everything so far as "perfect" but that still doesn't stop me fretting about something happening.

I know how you feel and it helps to talk about it so good on you for starting this thread. I think a lot of girls feel the same.

I try to keep myself really busy thinking about positive things to do with the baby, what I need to do to the house, what we need to buy, who we will tell first etc. I have also started reading a lot of the birth announcement stories on here - babies are being born ALL the time (There's "one born every minute" in the UK!!) and there is more chance that will happen for you now than anything else.

I hope it gets better - but if it doesn't, just remember you're not alone

 

[Serendipity40]

i am same have still not embraced this pregnancy as so worried something will go wrong am 12plus 4 today...i did have twins but one has stopped growing..which i was ok with as was so panicked over something going wrong and twins there is an even bigger risk...have my nxt scan on fri & like u have had 3 scans so far...

was watching a baby programe other day on tv & burst into tears as reality hit me that i could be having another baby this year..have had 2 m/c & lots of fertility treatment, have a 5 yr old ds...

i have been so sick for last few weeks my worries have not been formost in my mind as i just felt so ill..but if i allow myself to go there i just panic...

i just wanted to say you are not alone...even though i am now getting to end of 1st trimester i am now looking at statistics of 2nd trimester losses...

hopefully soon we can both embrace our pregnancies & start to enjoy them....

 

[ginamurr]

Thanks, ladies!

I think, now that my symptoms are subsiding - no more nausea and extreme hunger - it is making me even worse this week. I know the placenta is taking over hormone production now, so that is normal - but it definitely makes me feel less pregnant (except for how fat I feel right now -lol)

Also - what is the deal with the first trimester - some places I see it is over at 12 weeks and on other sites I see it lasts until 14 weeks! I can't wait much longer - lol! I hope it is 12 weeks!

 

[girlygirl:)]

I'm feeling the same, but I haven't heard heart beat as I dont have a doppler and I wont have a scan untill im 12 weeks (bloody NHS!!) X

 

[olivetree83]

I wish I was as far along as you ladies, I was happy to make it to 8 weeks but I am still nervous as hell. It's so unfortunate that so many things can happen and what's even worse is that I'm educated on this stuff by reading too much nonsense on Google! I have been banned from Google by my parents, husband, sister, and even doctor now! It's an addiction and much worse a curse.

I haven't seen my little one yet or heard the heartbeat, my first appointment is tomorrow and I have drove myself completely mad and insane. The days/hours/minutes cannot go by fast enough. You are not alone, I am too a constant worrier...my husband keeps joking because I'll say once I hear the heartbeat I'll relax and enjoy and he just keeps saying so what's going to start stressing you out after Wednesday? Ugh, I hate to admit it but he's right.

I am so tired of worrying, this is my first pregnancy and I've yet to thoroughly enjoy it. I just can't let my guard down after having a chemical in October. I just feel so very sad.

On a lighter note after hearing the heartbeat your miscarriage rate goes down to 2%, while I know probably like me you've read things about situations where women have lost their baby after the heartbeat you need to remember that this is a huge website and even though we hear about it alot it is very very RARE. Also remember that you cannot control what will happen so stressing over it won't change the outcome. Most likely you will have a beautiful baby in a few short months and your worries will change to other things. The odds of having two miscarriages in a row are also very RARE. It is said that if you conceive within 6 months of a previous miscarriage you are more likely to have a healthier pregnancy than if it took longer.

I don't know if you're religious or not but one thing I have told myself is that I have to forget about all the statistics and technicality that comes along with pregnancy (symptoms vs. no symptoms etc), there is a higher power involved in the creation of your child and only He knows your plans and only He can take care of you.

You are going to be just fine. Congratulations!

You won't ever stop worrying, but don't forget to enjoy things right along with that worry if must be.

All my best luck and love,
Olive

 

[acetoact]

I know exactly how you feel. I had two losses last year so when I saw a postive test in January I was thrilled yet terrifed. Dr said to see him as soon as I hit six weeks. I went in thinking the worst and as soon as I saw the lil beans heartbeat I burst into tears. I have been in every two weeks since because I cannot calm down for anything. They have been really good to me and have let me see the bean everytime so far. I am now 13+2 and I still panic daily. The dr's agree that I need something to help, so they are referring me to a counselor. I don't know if it will help, but I know it sure won't hurt. I don't have any advice, but I can offer hugs and let you know that you aren't alone in your fears.

 

[WannabemomV]

I too am not as far along as you are but the worrying is causing grey hairs.. I remember one lady say she miscarried at 6+2 (which is what I am today) so today was the day I have been waiting to get to and get over with. I also remember one that was 8 +4, So after today that is my next "goal" to pass.
Here in Canada we don't get a scan until 20 (TWENTY) weeks. We hear the heartbeat around 12-14 weeks. So Imagine the horrible wait I have. I see my doctor on friday and I am going to tell him I am not sure when my last AF was so he will send me for a dating scan. I just cant wait until 20 weeks to see my baby and know everything is fine.
I am getting excited about everything- the hunger, Exhaustion, the start of MS. It just means to me that the baby is Growing and is Healthy.

 

[AngelBunny]

i felt like this and although i have no advice, all i can say is the thing that worked for me was getting a doppler, hearing the LO on a daily basis is the most calming, reassuring thing it's done wonders for me. i don't think you ever stop worrying completely. cue 20 years of worrying from the date of your bfp hehee xx