Help me

[Pyrrhic]

There is no way for you to have a crystal ball and see the future, so ask yourself these questions:

1. Do you really want to be with a man, who rather than supports you tries to jump ship the first time there's a bit of change?

2. If you split up in a year's time anyway, would you be happy or upset that you'd had an abortion?

3. You say you're family are happy about the pregnancy. Will they ever forgive him, or even like him for pushing you into something like this?


You're boyfriend is effectively blackmailing you. Does that sound like love to you?

 

[ryder]

First thing, I think you should dump this loosers ass. That type of behaviour is emotional abuse and he is making it sound like him and his family are too good for you or something...

Life is more then that and you will learn this soon.

Second, the baby is your choice. You have to weigh your options carefully and think about what you want and how you will be able to adapt your life. Lots of girls your age manage fine...

My sister had her first child at 18, and believe me it was hard, and still is. She is now 31 and JUST was able to finish college. She has lived in financial strain and emotional strain for over 10 years.

However, that was her choice and she is happy and loves her children anyways.

If it were me? Personally at 19 I would have not kept the baby. Thinking back to when I was 19, I was in no place financially, emotionally, or maturity wise to adapt my life for a baby. Now that Im done school, have a good job, and a man who loves me for the right reasons, im happy to change my life... Though it is still hard!

Good luck though! Definately cut this looser out though.

 

[brownhairedmom]

You just wrote my story.

I'm 20, my ex is almost 24. Tried to force me into an abortion and I left him.

Here's the thing...if he isn't responsible enough at 24 years old to take care of a child, he needs a reality check. I know 16 year old boys who get girls pregnant who do a standup job and take care of their kids. He cannot use his age as an excuse!

If you don't want this abortion, don't get it. Your child is worth more than that idiot. Get rid of him - you and your precious baby will thank you in a years time.

 

[Carley]

If he is making you pick, then I think the choice should be easy.

How would you feel if you aborted then you both broke up?

If he loves you, like he says so...he would not put you in that position...

I honestly think you are better off with out him.

 

[Hevz]

Personally, if any man gave me the option to either keep him and have an abortion or lose him and keep the baby im afraid he would soon be single again. Anyone who can give you this ultimatum is not worth it. Hell it took 2 to create this baby and he should be responsible enough to deal with the consequences, i would rather get rid of HIM not the BABY. You must do what is right for you, not him.

I have to agree babe...he knows how it happens just the same as you and needs to take responsibility for his own actions

Best of luck babe....

 

[VicLl]

You've had some great advice. Having an abortion in any pregnancy is a very difficult thing to do and should not be done for someone else.

I wish you loads of luck.

 

[thelilbump]

Don't do anything u don't want to or aren't 100% sure about. Abortion isn't something u can turn round and undo. Don't be scared about doing it on your own, there are plenty of single parents out there that do just fine. either way in this i think you have to put yourself first.

 

[Irishmum]

Simple way of looking at it....

If any of our Fathers gave any of our mothers the same ultimatum you've been given and our Mothers did what they asked..... we wouldn't be here. Our lives would be non existant what ifs to our Parents. All of the people we have met, lives we have influenced (for good or bad) would never have had experiences with us.

Now if YOU (that word is soooo important) don't feel that you are in a position to have a baby and raise a child, if this child is an option that YOU personally dont want well then you have your other options. BUT if this baby IS what YOU want well then I gotta tell ya hun you can do it! And again I just want to say that I do really get that this is such a difficult position to find yourself in but that is why its so important you do what is right for you.

 

[aurora32]

Hey hunn,

If in doubt dont abort!!!, once you have you cant go back, no matter what happens with you and this seemingly waste of space u are with (sorry) this is the 2nd time he has done this to you so he really has no respect for you, plus it seems to me he is a little jealous that there will be something else in your life other than him getting your attention, you have crossed one of the major hurdles, your family are with you on this and thats worth a lot..... Only you can decide babe but think long and hard what you really want cos once done its with you for the rest of your life.

Either way best of luck its a toughie, although i know which i'd choose......