help what to do

[popp]

Im 19 weeks today and my ex started texting last night saying he didnt want to be a dad who was told where when and what time he can see his daughter, im more than happy to let him see her but as i will be breatfeeding it will be very hard for first month for him to just take her out as i stuggled to express with my little boy.
I dont want him to just turn up at my house all the time unexpected and think he can she her when ever he wants, as this will also upset my little boy who is four.
What would you do how oftern does your babys father see there baby we spilt up a few weeks after i found out i was pregnant.
I

 

[sweetlullaby]

Hun the best advice I can give is ignore him. A newborn baby will not be expected to leave you for a good while once its born. You will be your daughters main carer so he will have to work with what time and days suit you and your LO and you cannot possibly work all that out when your pregnant hun. If breastfeeding goes ok in the early days you will probably be feeding every two hours and you cant set in stone if it will be earlier or longer etc. He cannot tell you what to do and when he wants to see LO its up to you to decide. Also he can take your daughter out when YOU feel ready and can trust him enough not when he wants to etc.

Its a long while off hun but if he were to keep showing up at your house demanding to see LO then phone the police. You will have a little baby and your four year old and he would be harrassing you. The police would take it very seriously and you could even take out a non molestation order or injuntion order etc out against him which would mean he wouldnt be allowed near your house etc (not sure on the ins and outs of it)

In my situation FOB has seen LO once when he was 6 days old and that has been it so far. Its when it suits you and what your happy with hun i bolded that bit to stress the importance of it. I worried myself sick when I was pregnant and it was horrible. Do not let him get to you hun and stay strong!

 

[popp]

thanks hun i know il end up worrying myself sick over it. Im scared he trys to take her away from me.
Thing is we work in same job i dont see him all time they have been fab and changed my shift so i dont have to see him all the time but i just want to leave now but cant aford it.
I had postnatal depression with alfie dont want it again and alot of that was caused by his father who has never seen him his choice..

 

[suzanne108]

Very good advice there from sweetlullaby

It is not up to him to tell you when he is going to see your baby...he will have to fit around whatever suits you. DO NOT let him stress you out while you are pregnant...just ignore him and see what happens when baby arrives.

My FOB was really upset towards the end of my pregnancy because he didn't want to be a weekend dad (even though he'd begged and begged me to get an abortion!) But now that she is here he is already starting to get bored of seeing her. So whatever he says now may not apply when baby is here. Oh and he can't just turn up at your house and expect to see her or take her out if it isnt planned. Like SL said...just ring the police.

So yeah look after yourself and don't let him ruin your pregnancy xxx

 

[popp]

thanks girls for your great advise

 

[expecting09]

He doesn't want to be a dad unless it goes his own way? What a cock. Your the one thats going to be bringing up your daughter, what you say goes