Hep please mummies of more than 1 ~(long -sorry)

[mrsdcooper]

what should i do????? (long sorry)


hi all, hope everyone is fine

i need to get this out and ask for some advice from you lovely ladies please.

Hubby and i decided early after having our first little baby that this was really amazing and another was closer in our future than we initially expected. we talked alot and i posted on here trying to decide when next one would be good and we diecided to not activley try, but not actively not if you get me (thats what we did last time and i was lucky enough to have bump within 2 months) around the middle of this year. making Hermione around 18months when baby number 2 arrived.

Well i am falling more in love with my baby girl as the days pass she is interatcting and laughing and i love every day she is turning into a little person and its amazing. SO now i am worried about trying so soon? i dont want to miss any minute of her life, but at the same time haivn two close togheter means i wont miss out when she is a little bigger and off to little classes as both could go together and i wont be stuck feeding a baby? so really i need help i really dont know what to do. i wnat another and i think having them close together will be good for them and us as a family, but will i miss out on her and her little things, or will by the time baby 2 comes she start to be less changing.

So sorry its long - as you can gather really n two minds
HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

 

[alio]

i know what you mean. i feel exactly the same. my personal situation is that we have decided to wait a couple of years. like you say, now fin is becoming a little person i really want to get to know him before i bring another terror into the equation! hope you come to your decision soon honey. xx

 

[UKMummy]

I had my three 18 months apart, so the first and the second were 9 months old when I fell with the next one. I have to say that I am pleased I did because the older two play so well together, they really are little friends and the third is only 3 years younger than the eldest so they will be able to play together too in a few years. Have I missed out on the other two growing up? No, because I am with them every hour of every day at home and they have leant to compromise and share a lot more than some of their peers who were only children for a lot longer before any siblings turned up.

Also, do be aware that just because number one turned up quickly, it may not be the case for number two. These things can't always be planned.

Sorry if this sounded one sided but this is my personal opinion! There are pros and cons to a small and a large age gap!

 

[kalouk]

Hi,can't speak from personal experience but a friend of mine had her two children very close together, not on purpose, and I know she always said that she always felt that her eldest child was somehow rushed through her toddler years, and that in an ideal world she would have had more time with her eldest before her other came along because with two everything seemed like a whirlwind, but now things have reversed because her first is a very bright child and they are both in school and she feels that her youngest is losing out a bit because everything he achieves his sister has just done before him! Sorry just realised I am starting to ramble, hope you get the gist of what I am trying to say!

 

[emma_27]

I waited until Benn was 2 before we started trying. Benn was 3 when Ellie came along. I couldnt have coped with two really young uns. I loved the time me and Benn got together as well.

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

3 years between my first two and I found that a nice gap. It was nice to have potty training and stuff done with at least.

 

[princess_bump]

i don't have any personal experience honey, all i no is we're waiting till maddi is around 4 to start ttc again. i too am just enjoying this time, just us! for us, i didn't want them that close in age. i like the idea of a few years gap. but with everything, its completely personal to you! i think when ever you decide to have another it will be amazing and the perfect time because you adore your babies. lots of luck what ever you decide x

 

[babystar]

I have 2 already. My oldest is comin up 7 and my youngest has just turned 1. My nxt one is due Oct. Theres a small gapin age between my 2 youngest and I worry about how we will cope but at the end of the day I believe it will all be ok ! good luck

 

[poppy]

I think there are pros and cons to both ways - I think it comes down to how you and your hubbie feel. There is no doubt that Hermione would adjust to a little brother or sister and I think that even though you would not get the one to one time with her as much as you are getting now, with a new baby, you would get the benefit of seeing the two grow up close together. You would still see her little changes as well.

I think the difference is mostly in the one to one time you get with a baby when you have a toddler as well. My friend is due her second baby in June and her little girl is two - she said how much she enjoyed breastfeeding quietly with her little girl when she was a baby and how she enjoyed the one to one time. However, she is worried that she won't have that as much with baby number two as she will have to give her little girl attention as well.