Hitting/spanking your kids..

[Sarah88]

I agree with you hon.

And funny, you learn as they get older. I've implemented a new reward system this week and I have to say, I wish I had done it sooner. I've noticed a big difference in them the past few days.

Could you share this reward system? Just for personal interest.

 

[leeanne]

https://www.babyandbump.com/general-chatter/42463-rofl-my-new-system-kids.html

Right here hon!

 

[Sarah88]

Thanks!

 

[acv_17]

I didn't read every post, but I'd have to say I wouldn't be able to physically discipline my future kids. As a previous poster said, maybe if they're in a dangerous situation I would but that would only be because I wouldn't be able to think about it at the time(if that makes sense).

I'm not saying it's bad to do it, It's just not my choice. In my opinion, it's consistency that is the problem. I remember one time, a couple years ago, I was at my aunts. My cousin, who was about 4 at the time, was misbehaving. I swear she threatened him to go onto the naughty chair about 10 times and he never went. If you're(people in general) not consistent with the type of discipline you choose, the child will just keep doing whatever he's doing.

I wish I could smack some of the customers I get. I work in the electronics department at Wal-mart, and we get some pretty disrespectful people in there!

 

[Blah11]

I didn't know that they've actually made a rule about smacking in public. The stupid government think they can control everything!

Well they can LOL If there wasn't laws there would be rapists and murderers and theives running around our streets. The world would not be a very happy place.

 

[Blah11]

Oh and I want to do positive reinforcement with my child when the time comes. I think rewarding good behaviour says as much as punishing bad behaviour. Children crave attention and too many parents ignore good behaviour when they should make a big deal about it so the child knows we are happy with them.



++ If ANYONE other than myself or my babys father lays a hand on them I will sh*t bricks.

 

[mBLACK]

++ If ANYONE other than myself or my babys father lays a hand on them I will sh*t bricks.

I second that, regardless if it's my mother, father, auntie uncle anybody.. nobody is touching my baby.

 

[mizzi]

smacking the hand is fine, as long as its done by the parent, and noone else, id go mad if my mum slapped my child.

slap on the leg didnt do me no harm when i was little... lol

 

[Sarahkka]

I meant to post this ages ago. We Canadians not only have laws controlling spanking, but we have recently had a very disturbing precedent set in family court.
This spring we had an unbelievable family court case in Canada in which a judge overturned a father's grounding of his 12-year old daughter for...get this...posting her profile on a dating site!!!! At age 12!!!! The father (quite rightfully, in my opinion) told her to take down the profile and she refused, so he grounded her and said that she was no longer allowed to go on her 6th-grade graduation field trip.
This child went to her mother (parents were divorced) and they sued her father to overturn his authority on the matter and the judge agreed with them!!! So we have a responsible parent trying to protect his child from potentially exposing herself to danger on an online dating site (like we don't have enough horrible stories of internet predators), and the judge reinforces the child's bad behaviour and erodes the authority of the parent.
This caused quite an outrage in Canada, as you may well imagine!
How is a parent supposed to be a consistent disciplinarian or set reasonable boundaries for a child when the child can simply challenge any punishment in court?!
The article explains that some of it was due to family law stipulations in Quebec, but I still think it was shocking that a court would overturn that father's punishment as "too harsh". Grounding harsh? He didn't beat her! He grounded her for a pretty major infraction. Holy moses, if that were my kid, she'd be lucky if I didn't ground her until her high school graduation for posting herself on a dating site!
Here's the link, if you want to read the story:
https://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2008/06/19/father-court.html

 

[brownhairedmom]

Oh my Lord!!!!!!!

 

[mommytashaX2]

I don't think that spanking/hitting is the proper way to go about disciplining your children. I was physically disciplined as a child and I don't have any resentment towards my mother and I am not at all a violent person however, I do feel that when you hit a child, it sends the message of fear instead of love and your child will be more proned to get into trouble behind your back because they are afraid of how you'll respond if they tell you the truth. I have tried spanking in the past and I realized that it was not the type of message I wanted to send my child, plus, she was repeating the same behavior over and over. I have decided that this time around, I am not going to spank my son at all, but use different measures to discipline.

 

[Shri]

I meant to post this ages ago. We Canadians not only have laws controlling spanking, but we have recently had a very disturbing precedent set in family court.
This spring we had an unbelievable family court case in Canada in which a judge overturned a father's grounding of his 12-year old daughter for...get this...posting her profile on a dating site!!!! At age 12!!!! The father (quite rightfully, in my opinion) told her to take down the profile and she refused, so he grounded her and said that she was no longer allowed to go on her 6th-grade graduation field trip.
This child went to her mother (parents were divorced) and they sued her father to overturn his authority on the matter and the judge agreed with them!!! So we have a responsible parent trying to protect his child from potentially exposing herself to danger on an online dating site (like we don't have enough horrible stories of internet predators), and the judge reinforces the child's bad behaviour and erodes the authority of the parent.
This caused quite an outrage in Canada, as you may well imagine!
How is a parent supposed to be a consistent disciplinarian or set reasonable boundaries for a child when the child can simply challenge any punishment in court?!
The article explains that some of it was due to family law stipulations in Quebec, but I still think it was shocking that a court would overturn that father's punishment as "too harsh". Grounding harsh? He didn't beat her! He grounded her for a pretty major infraction. Holy moses, if that were my kid, she'd be lucky if I didn't ground her until her high school graduation for posting herself on a dating site!
Here's the link, if you want to read the story:
https://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2008/06/19/father-court.html

Something has gone terribly wrong in a childs upbringing if they have so little respect for the adults that are trying to protect them. I think her mother has a lot to answer for in this particular case.

Aren't there parental controls you can put on your computer anyway? How did she end up accessing a dating site and why does this 12 year old girl not understand what age group is appropriate for her to be dating?

 

[Sarahkka]

Shri-
Pretty nuts, eh?
There may well be other family dynamics going on that complicated everything, but the story is still shocking. I agree with you - that mother needs to take a long hard look at her actions.
I would guess that even if the father had controls on his computer, he can't be sure that the daughter isn't accessing that site from somewhere else - a friend's or her mother's, for instance. His best way of protecting her is to get her to take her profile down.
I'm just shocked that the family court judge didn't turn around and question the parenting suitability of the mother. It's not like the girl was just acting up - what she was doing was disturbing and potentially dangerous. How could that be overlooked?

 

[mBLACK]

Worlds crazy sometimes!

 

[Sarah88]

The judge needs his license or whatever he has to be a judge revoked.