Homebirth with 2 year old in the house?

[maria2611]

Hi. I would like a homebirth after a horrible hospital birth experience with my son. My living arrangements then were unsuitable for a homebirth. We now live about 30-40 minutes from a hospital and I had a very quick labour with my son so possibly wouldn't make it in time if going down the hospital route again!

Only problem is we also live a fair distance from family/friends who I would have to look after him this time. Has anyone had a homebirth with their toddler present? Or would I be better off going to the hospital again *shudders*. He'll be 2 and a half when baby is due

 

[BunnyN]

I'm afraid I'm not much help to answer your question. I have thought about this subject myself. I think I'd rather not have a toddler in the house because I'd find it distracting and i'd be worried about the noise i was making etc but I'd do it if it was the only way of having a home birth. Plenty of people have done it and it worked for them.

If you went to hospital who would look after your toddler, and how would you get them there? That could be an issue if you had a quick birth last time.

If your toddler is in the house will your partener be there to look after him if needs be and would that be okay with you if he can't give you full attention all the time.

 

[maria2611]

Thanks for replying.

The only people I have really that my son knows well enough to stay with are my parents 30 mins away. Would involve oh leaving me to drop him off with them in the car and coming back. I would be happier with my lo at home, as hes never really been away from us, but I'm worried it will scare him. So unsure what to do

 

[MrsWatson]

I'm considering this as well atm.

I had a home birth for my first dd, and now expecting no 2!

My best friend had 2 home births while her 1st, and then 1st and 2nd were at home. She went into labour in the evening, kids went to bed, she gave birth, and the kids didn't wake up!

I'm hoping for the same!

 

[ttc bubby no2]

We had DS1 around when DS2 was born although he was slightly older as he just turned 3. He was pretty good at occupying himself and wasn't really all that interested in the birth. He actually went outside to play when DS2 was actually born. It would help if you could get someone to be there to help look after him during the birth but if it isn't an option then you could probably manage.

We read the book "hello baby" to him lots while I was pregnant so he had an idea of what to expect when I actually went into labour.

 

[BunnyN]

I saw a birth video when I was pregnant of a HB with quite a young child there. I was impressed by how relaxed the kid was, he just wandered in and out and sat on the bed eating mellon and offering it to his mum. He obviously wasn't at all worried by his mums noises etc. and the mum seemed fine with him being around.

 

[maria2611]

Thanks for all your replies

I would love him to stay in the house really. Just hope baby comes at night! I was talking to my mum today (she was there with my oh at Ieuan's birth), and she said she would come stay with him and if baby comes at night, be an extra support for me. Feeling a bit more confident about it now

 

[BunnyN]

If your mum can be there and you want her to be that sounds perfect. I'm sure that he will be fine with someone else there just to look after him.

 

[Pearls18]

It's tricky, I don't want DS in the room I think it'll be distracting for me and scary for him, I live 150 miles away from family and as it is Christmas I don't feel like I can ask our friends. My mum will be here some of the time over Christmas so if it happens then that would be great but tbh I am hoping it happens in the night when he's sleeping, worse case scenario DH will have to keep him distracted but it's not enough of a concern for me to consider a hospital birth, it'll work out.

 

[Wolfie]

I'm having to think of this too. My mum is travelling from Australia (24 hr flight) so if baby comes early she won't be there to look after my 2 year old. I have asked a friend who lives 20 mins away to look after him. I'm not sure if she'd be in the house or take him to hers. I just hope my mum is here before I go into labour. Could you pay for a taxi for your mum to come and be with you?

 

[Mark&Annie]

I'm planning to have bubs at home, my boys will be 2 1/2 and 4. My husband, midwife and mother will be there so between us I'm sure it will be fine!
If its during the day, I guess they will be playing about, would love them to meet their baby sister fresh from the tub! Joshua, my eldest, loves watching birth programmes with me! He's really excited and knows how babies come out lol!
It was pretty chilled last time, I'm not too noisy or dramatic so, all being well, fingers crossed, it's hound be lovely to have them there!

Can you not call your mum when you go into labour, and she could come to you rather than hubbie going to take son to her?