Hospital vs home birth?

[Linzi]

I agree, Linzy, that it's hard to find unbiased facts. And perhaps that's because, though the facts don't change from one side to the other, how important those facts are are different to both sides... so it's hard to find the info all in one place. The best I've been able to do is simply get both sides from different sources, and then consider all the information I've gathered.
For your colleague at work to make that "Russian roulette" comment is just ridiculous... it's as if people think you haven't carefully considered your decision, and they think that once they say that you'll go, "What? It could be risky? Ohhhhh... I'd better think again!"

I had a woman the other day, when I was at the gas station buying a Diet Coke, and she started to ring me up without the drink. I said, "Oh and this too." and she paused, and then said, "Oh... for your husband?" and I said, "Nope.. for me..." and she leaned closer to me and almost whispered, "But... aren't you... pregnant?"

I wanted to fake a really shocked face, let my hands fly to my belly and say, "Oh!! So I am!! Well, no Coke for me. Whew! That was a close one..."

I realize my caffeine story is a totally different level than your decision to have a homebirth, but it just makes me think : People have got to stop and realize that women aren't stupid...and that you didn't just wake up one day and say, "Well, I don't really feel like going alllll the way to the hospital... I mean packing a bag is such a drag.... I think I'll just deliver here. Whew. Glad that's settled."

Hope you told your colleague where to stick it.... as nicely as you could manage.

I think it all comes down to the media again. They very rarely show women who are clued up about their pregnancies, the only stuff you get in the media (that people watch) are shows like OBEM where woman is on their back, screaming in horrific pain when it's not always like that. The the other side of the coin (I know we get them in UK so assume there is shows in the US too) like "pissed and pregnant", "smoking and pregnant" etc which shows people as stereotypes who actually probably don't know a lot or care either, but the majority of pregnant women aren't like that anyway.

I never actually told her where to stick it I just avoided talking about it to her coz I knew I would never change her mind and there was just no point even trying. She obviously went through something that was quite traumatic to her and affected her whole view of the situation.

 

[Blah11]

pushing is the oddest sensation ever. People compare it to having a poo but its NOTHING like that, its so weird.

Could you try and describe it please

its like your body takes over whether you like it or not. You get these urges and can feel your entire abdomen contract really hard and you push down. Its really very difficult to explain LOL

I defo got the urge to push with EJ lol and if i could have just breathed through with a little pushing it not pushed all guns blazing i could have possibly avoided the tear i got lol, so my Aim has changed to allow my body to do the "pushing" and to just give in and let it rather than put my own force into it as well. i dont recall the urge with Nate defo not in the pool or during the Ventouse delivery it was simply a case of following instructions but it was my first and I didnt know differently , its quite probable that my body was to exausted so nature disrupted that "push" message getting to my brain since i was in no state to be able to pick up and care for a newborn.

excuse the hippy-esk theme but for me my body defo tells me when its safe for me to have the baby or not hence why i didnt even start labor natrually with ds2 but was induced lol and why i cant labor sucessfully when im stressed at all which led to stop start ( nightly ) labor for 10 days before labor started with ds1

which i guess is why im set in my head now more than ever ( thanks to this debate in part ) about having the birth that I know will have me in the best frame of mind to safely bring this baby into the world. lol now the job is convicing my consultant to let me birth a 10lb+ baby at home

Hm, I found I did need to push myself too and work alongside my body. I think the main thing I did to not tear was really listen to the MW. When she said don't push, I didn't and panted etc when she told me too.

 

[Linzi]

pushing is the oddest sensation ever. People compare it to having a poo but its NOTHING like that, its so weird.

Could you try and describe it please

its like your body takes over whether you like it or not. You get these urges and can feel your entire abdomen contract really hard and you push down. Its really very difficult to explain LOL

I defo got the urge to push with EJ lol and if i could have just breathed through with a little pushing it not pushed all guns blazing i could have possibly avoided the tear i got lol, so my Aim has changed to allow my body to do the "pushing" and to just give in and let it rather than put my own force into it as well. i dont recall the urge with Nate defo not in the pool or during the Ventouse delivery it was simply a case of following instructions but it was my first and I didnt know differently , its quite probable that my body was to exausted so nature disrupted that "push" message getting to my brain since i was in no state to be able to pick up and care for a newborn.

excuse the hippy-esk theme but for me my body defo tells me when its safe for me to have the baby or not hence why i didnt even start labor natrually with ds2 but was induced lol and why i cant labor sucessfully when im stressed at all which led to stop start ( nightly ) labor for 10 days before labor started with ds1

which i guess is why im set in my head now more than ever ( thanks to this debate in part ) about having the birth that I know will have me in the best frame of mind to safely bring this baby into the world. lol now the job is convicing my consultant to let me birth a 10lb+ baby at home

Hm, I found I did need to push myself too and work alongside my body. I think the main thing I did to not tear was really listen to the MW. When she said don't push, I didn't and panted etc when she told me too.

I needed to push as well, I got a horrible 'feeling' but it didn't feel like my body pushing iykwim? That feeling is the worst though, where you need to push and they tell you not to I tried and ended up pushing anyway just to get him out, not sure if maybe that's why I tore :/

Reminds me I need to buy a torch today

xxx

 

[indy and lara]

The theatre is literally at the door of the labour ward of my hospital. It would take 60 secs or less to transfer.

 

[Blah11]

^ Would you go to the new birthing centre? Apparently its lovely

p.s. i do believe the simpsons is one of the best neonatal and maternity units in the UK so i think its a bit more prepared for emergencies as its bigger and the layout is new.

 

[tallybee]

I haven't read through all the posts here, so apologies if I am merely repeating things already said.

I believe that each woman should arm themselves with as much info as possible in order to do what is best for them. Many simply do not realise that there is any other option than going into hospital.

Personally I would have hated to go into hospital to have my babies; of course if I'd had complications I would probably have been told it was safer but I wasn't, there were no increased risk factors. In that situation, for me, there was no need to medicalise birth. I was relaxed which made the labour easier IMO.

At one stage at an antenatal appointment the MW tried to steer me towards going for hospital - because of staffing. Sorry but that's a shit reason. For me, going into hospital would be more risky because you never know what'll happen. I know my bedroom isn't going to be fully booked for instance, and that I won't end up giving birth in a car on the way there or in some corridor or something! (Both my labours were short). I know where everything is, and can get nice food afterwards without having to ask.

If we ever manage to get pregnant I will do the same again, no question about it.

 

[Blah11]

^ True about the room issue. I laboured in triage until I was about 7cm and whilst there I did hear MWs shouting 'don't push, don't push yet' and seconds later a baby crying and a 'congratulations' next door lol.

 

[moomin_troll]

they took my bed out of my room half was during my labour because someone else needed it

 

[indy and lara]

Under different circumstances yes. I think it will be great- I contributed to the consultation period;-) However, if we ever find the courage to try again I would be high risk again so not likely be a suitable candidate.

I think that NHS Lothian have an outstanding obs department.

 

[Blah11]

Good old baby boom!

 

[KatieB]

I had fantastic care in hospital and would always want a hospital birth after I had to go into theatre for delivery. Louis was back to back and after 2 hours of full on pushing on top of an 18 hour labour I had to have an assisted delivery. This all happened very quickly and was scary, they gave me a spinal block for possible c-section but fortunately I only needed forceps. So after that experience it will always be hospital for me but I can see why women want home births, I think it is lovely, but most definitely not for me xx

 

[lynnikins]

I guess being in london and my nearest hospital being rated "best in london" by mothers last year and 15-16 babies being born there each day on average last year then the demand is quite high for the hospital and staffing requirements but it unfortunatly means the MW's there are quite overworked and busy and have little time for any 1-1 care, i was in hospital 9 hours before EJ was born and saw no less than 6 different staff members as my "primary MW" during that time which to me didnt make things nice and relaxing by any means. They tried to make me wait 2 more days for my induction caus " they were gonna be too busy" well what if me and 4 other women had just gone into labor naturally and needed the services? they didnt have the beds avalible hence why i birthed on the MW unit after being induced which is a BIG no no and i was told it would never be allowed when i was begging to be allowed to use the MW unit if only given one lot of gel for induction.

I would rather be at home, knowing the very good facilitys are there IF i need them but that im not taking up a bed that could be used by a mother who does Need it that time.
Ive had friends had to be transfered to another hospital thats a good 25 min + drive away cause there wernt beds avalible when needed.

its not the hospitals fault or the MW's fault that the funding isnt there to make the service high quality for everyone and I dont blame them they work hard I just dont want to go there lol,

 

[Mummy2onexx]

i had a traumatic but very positive hospital birth and i would never have a home birth, my LO got stuck and her heartbeat dropped to an alarming rate if i didn't have the emergency c-section that i had my little girl would have died and possibly me to as from the amount of blood i lost so i'm thankful i was at the hospital because i had this experience now i'd never have a home birth i just think hospitals are there for a reason and i wouldn't want to risk my baby because i couldn't get to a hospital quick enough x

 

[MandaAnda]

I'd started involuntarily pushing during labour. There's no way in the world I could've stopped if they'd told me. I remember saying to the midwife, "Look, I just wanted to let you know that I'm pushing at the peak of contractions. Well, my body is anyway." It felt good to push as well. I ended up having directed pushing at the end, which I soooo did NOT want (and probably didn't need, but their stupid machines said "he was getting tired" and there's no way in hell they were coming near me with forceps or ventouse). There's no need, on the whole. In the vast majority of labours, your body will push when ready without your brain thinking, "Hmm, I think I'll push now." It's called the fetal ejection reflex, and it's amazing.

^ As you can see, I resent my unplanned stay in hospital. Despite their concerns, they did nothing there that couldn't have been handled at home. And if I were at home, my labour would've likely gone quicker (due to me being able to move around more and being less stressed) and been more pleasant all around. I won't hesitate to plan a homebirth when I'm next lucky enough to get pregnant.

 

[TennisGal]

I dont give two hoots-both hospital and home have their pros and cons. The reason I don't give two hoots, is because the decisions have been taken away from me. I am considered high risk, and will be birthing in hospital. I am completely happy with this decision-I have one of the top consultants in the country looking after me, and am at a top hospital.

If I wasn't high risk, I'd consider home birthing,..but the distance from home to hospital would probably concern me.

I had a hard, hard first birth-and so anxiety will always play a major part.

I've never really gone into my birth on the board before, but words such as uterine rupture were floating around...with a team of many by my side,

Ive also never had any bad feelings about it, such was my relief to see my red faced darling daughter, until today when I read about my 'selfishness' for having an epidural. I wanted to get through on paracetemol. I was adamant I wouldn't have pain relief, I'd researched it. I know pain from previous medical situations, and when your contractions are no longer registering, as they are off the scale for 18 hours...you listen to some of the top people in the country advising you what to do. I am horrified by that comment, horrified.

By the same token, I could call anyone who eats at-risk food selfish, anyone who sips a drink, who uses a chemical cleaner...I wouldn't, because I know it's ridiculous to do so.

Why can't we learn to respect that the vast majority of people do what is best for their
child? That we are mature adults?

I would never, ever, ever put my comfort before my child. But I took medical advice. From a top person, and my research afterwards showed that he was right.

I wish happy, healthy births for all home and hospital birthers...may we and our babies all be healthy and happy in our choices and experiences.

Eta: by two hoots, I mean the decision was easy for me. Not thst it's not important. I think home birth would be a beautiful experience...all births are.

 

[Ashley8806]

I just wanted to add, that my hospital I will be delivering at is almost an hour away (45 min maybe?).... there are none that are closer in the case of an emergency, so that is why I prefer to be in a hospital as well

 

[Tasha]

I have given birth in four different hospitals in London (Ealing, Queen Charlotte's and Chelsea, West Middlesex University Hospital, Chelsea and Westminster Hospital and back to Queen Charlotte's and Chelsea) and each of them theatre was very close. Ealing on labour ward, QC&C on labour ward, West Middlesex is in the middle of Labour and antenatal wards, C&W again on labour ward, so each of them it would take 1-2 minutes to get into theatre, max. So it really does depend on your hospital.

As for involuntary pushing, with my oldest I didnt feel much due to epidural, my second I pushed myself, one massive push and she shot out and ruptured her cord on the way out, third baby I really didnt feel ready to deliver her (labour was 45 mins from first contraction to her being plus I knew she was going to born sleeping, so was scared) and my body did it completly itself I was even fighting it say I dont want to push over and over, but my body pushed her out regardless and similar with my fifth. I find that quite amazing.

 

[charlotte-xo]

To be honest i dont think id ever consider a home birth after my experience with alfie. To cut along story short he got stuck up the birth canal and i had to have alot of intervention from drs ect and alfie needed alot of help after. I was so glad i was at a hospital with lots of drs who knew what they were doing iykwim. No disrespect at all meant to women who want or have had homebirths its just not something id feel comfortable with. Even though id be able to get in an ambulance if something went wrong i just always think what if i didnt get to the hospital quick enough ect..