how do i get in the mood for sex???

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by baileybram, Dec 23, 2009.

  1. baileybram

    baileybram Pregnant with number 3

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    Hi girls,

    I really need some advise the last time i had sex was when i concieved i just really dont feel in the mood. My oh is great but even hes beginning to get frustrated and i feel guilty as its unfair of me to keep pushing him away.He isnt putting any pressure on me or anything like that and he isnt doing anything wrong thats making me not want him its just the way i feel so how do i snap out of it?

    Think it would be nice if i could have sex over xmas without having to pretend i want it!!
     
  2. lili24

    lili24 Preggers with #2!

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    I feel the same, we only tried once while I've been pregnant and I had spotting the next day so we never did it again.. there is no way I could get in the mood right now :( It is because I am still scared to do it I think in case I bleed afterwards.

    Not much help but you aren't alone!

    Hopefully the girls will have some tips!! xxx
     
  3. broodylocket

    broodylocket Well-Known Member

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    im not much help either, im not into sex at all and dont think i will be. i dream about sex but i dont want actually :sex:
     
  4. cindi

    cindi Mom of 4 girls

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    i'm the same, but sometimes you just get the urge i didn't want it at all with my daughter lily and then all the sudden i was like a mad woman lol. try getting into things slowly. maybe cuddling while watching movies and go from there..............
     
  5. Sadie92

    Sadie92 Wife,Mummy & TTC No2

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    hmm it can be very frustrating.
    I really couldnt get in to the mood during my first tri... i also felt really bad for dh.

    I used to light candles, watch a romantic film and just have a cosy night in to try to relax myself...and get in the mood. Sometimes it worked. OH but i tell u what really worked for me... when DH came into the shower with me...
    Just seeing him all wet turned me on lol!

    I also found that if i was not relaxed i could never get in the mood.

    Now i cant get enough... lol

    Good Luck hun, hope you work something out.

    x
     
  6. baileybram

    baileybram Pregnant with number 3

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    Thanks girls,

    It makes me laugh beacuse i dream about sex aswell but when it comes to it i just dont want it. I even get annoyed when he tries to cuddle me as i just want to shout get off me its not like i can have a few drinks to relax and get in the mood. I really wish i could snap out of it. Dosent help that our little boy isnt sleeping great at the moment and of course being pregnant im tired anyway. My bf also got a new job which means he is working 6 long days a week so dont get to spend much time together when one of us isnt tired. ok moan over must snap out of this lol!!!
     
  7. Bingles

    Bingles Proud mum of one

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    I was actually chatting to one of my good mates about this very thing the other day she has a little boy and she said the best thing to get you in the mood is to give birth and wait 6 months lol :haha:
     
  8. AFC84

    AFC84 Mama to One + Bun :)

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    I feel your pain, I'm rarely interested either! Just thinking, I have sex dreams/sleep orgasms as well but sometimes if I wake up...ahem...too early and feel frustrated then that can be a good time to wake the bf! :lol: It's weird cos I've never been a fan of morning sex, but it just makes sense seeing as the dreams can kinda get you started!

    It's a bit sad but I usually find a few drinks does the trick too, and obviously that's out the window now!
     
  9. rwhite

    rwhite Mum to Lachie and Clem

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    I'm afraid I can't offer too much advice sorry hun, as OH is the one who needs to be hounded for :sex: :rofl:...I have to control myself, lest I jump him!

    A good way to get yourself in the mood could perhaps be to pamper yourself - buy yourself a new outfit, or get your hair done, or even just have a lovely soak in the bath with some nice bubblebath and exfoliate your skin until it's baby soft. It'll get you feeling really good about yourself, and you never know :winkwink: You could also ask your OH if he would mind giving you a massage, maybe add some candles in to the equation and some gentle music (not trying to sound cheesy I promise :haha:), and he could give you some nice kisses? Massage releases endorphins and that might lead you somewhere xx

    Another suggestion, try flirting with him and see if that works. It's always nice to ignite some of that spark that we sometimes forget we used to have in the early days :D

    Hope this helps x
     
  10. MiissMuffet

    MiissMuffet Well-Known Member

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    sometimes there is nothing u can do. Sorry i can't be much help but I hate sex right now. There is NOTHING that will make me wanna do it :(
     
  11. Las78

    Las78 Mum to 3 beautiful girls

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    |I know how you feel hun, not interested at all, would quite happily go without forever now lol, I'm sure it will change though.

    It's hard on your OH, I know mine gets really frustrated especially when I don't even want him to cuddle me (I seem to really need my space in this pregnancy and do NOT like to be touched - odd!!)

    Unfortunately I think when you feel like this, pretending (and praying for it to be over quick as), is the only thing to get out of it for a while.

    Good luck, it's meant to get better the further along you are x
     
  12. ginab

    ginab Mummy to Maggie Mae

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    I agree with rwhite... maybe try pampering yourself for a day have a massage, do yourself up a bit and make your hair look nice?? just make yourself feel sexy then you might feel a bit more up for it..

    what works for me is.. I know its naughty but if i watch a bit of sex on tv not nec a porno but a racey movie maybe that gets me going!!

    Also if you just say to him 'do you fancy a quickie?' then you dont have to be long as you've already told him you want it to be quick! Chances are if you've not done it in a while it wont take long anyway! heheee
     
  13. MiissMuffet

    MiissMuffet Well-Known Member

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    i tried the pamper thing but i seriously don't feel sexy at all. Any touch feels disgusting. Sex just makes me wanna hurl. Plus when bubz starts moving if we are doing it it feels so wrong! I guess some things u can't force yourself to do, your OH should understand. plenty time after bubz is born. x
     

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