How old is too old?

[londonangel]

I think it really depends with the breastfeeding. I saw something where a mum was breastfeeding her twins (they were about two) and while I didn't have a problem with the fact she was still breastfeeding, they were clamouring for it all day and obviously using it for comfort and being put to sleep by being on the breast, which personally I do not think is a good idea once they are as old as two as I feel we owe it to our little ones to teach them to self settle. Still, each to their own I suppose

 

[Lauki]

BF past the age of 2 seems a bit odd to me. The child is old enough to get perfect nutrition from other sources so I would personally wean from that point onwards. I do think there should be a cut off point. In the same way you can say a child is too old to be in nappies there is an age where a child is too old to be bf. for me, that age is 2.

The thing is though, breastfeeding is so much more than nutrition! That's what's so wonderful about it!

So when would you consider the cut-off date? Certainly breast milk is very nutritious, but I'm certain there's an age where the benefits are no longer as "beneficial" - if you know what I mean. Otherwise we'd all be still sucking on our mama's tatas!

I think the 'cut-off' date is different for every child. Some are ready to stop when they're like 14 months, some continue until they are 5. Same that some babies walk when they're 8 months, some walk when they're 18 months.
Some kids are happily potty trained by 18 months, with some you're best off waiting until they're 2.5 before they're ready.

There will always be antibodies and good things in breastmilk and there will always be comfort to find when nursing.

Obviously it's each to their own. No one should be forced to do things they do not want in any situation in their lives. I'm perfectly fine with people switching to formula, but I would've hoped that other people would be perfectly fine for mums and babies to continue breastfeeding if they are happy doing it.

After all, I've never seen or heard of a child that was harmed by extended breastfeeding.

 

[freckleonear]

The natural age of weaning is up to about 7 or 8 years when the child loses their milk teeth. All the benefits of breastfeeding continue to increase as the duration of breastfeeding increases, so there are lots of nutritional and emotional benefits of continuing to breastfeed for as long as the child wants.

The mattress on the floor is a good idea if you need to join two mattresses together. I don't cosleep anymore but my 4 year old occasionally spends the night in our bed, so I can absolutely see how it would be beneficial to cosleep full-time.

And I agree that babies don't need baby toiletries or lots of expensive toys (she didn't say absolutely no toys).

 

[mummy2be...]

I think three and a half is to old and after that age I'm wondering If it's more for the mother than the child? I have a friend who still bf her 4 year old because SHE can't bear to stop although her lb is being picked on at school for it..... To me that's selfish..

 

[RaspberryK]

Oh believe me you can't force a child to nurse! If the child wants to wean it will.
X

 

[mummy2lola]

Completely agree with mummy2b...

Xx

 

[Blah11]

I think it really depends with the breastfeeding. I saw something where a mum was breastfeeding her twins (they were about two) and while I didn't have a problem with the fact she was still breastfeeding, they were clamouring for it all day and obviously using it for comfort and being put to sleep by being on the breast, which personally I do not think is a good idea once they are as old as two as I feel we owe it to our little ones to teach them to self settle. Still, each to their own I suppose

sorry but i think they self settle in their own time too! im very much child/baby led. I think we (as a soceity) force our children to grow up waaaay too quickly.

 

[Blah11]

I think three and a half is to old and after that age I'm wondering If it's more for the mother than the child? I have a friend who still bf her 4 year old because SHE can't bear to stop although her lb is being picked on at school for it..... To me that's selfish..

Like I said, the problem lies with people who are totally clueless as to what its like to feed a toddler/pre schooler. As if you can continue when the child doesnt want to

 

[Lauki]

It's not like you can force a child to latch on and lay still if they don't want to?

 

[Ozzieshunni]

I slightly amazed at how little the majority know about the benefits of extended breastfeeding. This is why education is so important.

I don't want this topic to turn poor but in a healthy bfing relationship the mother follows the lead of the child. There is no forcing involved and a mother wouldn't continue for her sake.

 

[mummy2be...]

But the child doesn't know any difference???? Of course they arnt going to want to stop something that they have been having since day dot, and my friends mf doesn't understand why the cruel children in his playground are ripping him apart for
It, it's normal to him. I think the damage from the bullying is doing alot more damage than stopping would. My friend has admitted she hasn't weaned him off because she loves doing it and that IS selfish.

 

[Blah11]

Then its the mothers of the bullies who have to be ashamed, not the mother who is still feeding her child.

If what you say about your friend is true then I assure you, thats very much the tiny minority and NOT the norm.

You say of course the child isnt going to stop but, they do? My LO self weaned. SHE decided she was finished and stopped asking for it

 

[mummy2be...]

Then its the mothers of the bullies who have to be ashamed, not the mother who is still feeding her child.

If what you say about your friend is true then I assure you, thats very much the tiny minority and NOT the norm.

You say of course the child isnt going to stop but, they do? My LO self weaned. SHE decided she was finished and stopped asking for it

If what I say is true?

..... Can you please be more specific about which part Of what I've said your questioning? I don't need to have a discussion where I'm basically accused of lying- I've got better things to do with my time!

 

[Ozzieshunni]

Ok, breathe all.

There are cases where a mother does not want to stop and will subtly encourage it whether she knows it or not. She doesn't want her baby to grow up.

HOWEVER! The MAJORITY will naturally let their children cut back and let the child indicate when they want to be breastfed. Alex has clear signs when he wants boob and I respond to them.

 

[MrsHedgehog]

But the child doesn't know any difference???? Of course they arnt going to want to stop something that they have been having since day dot, and my friends mf doesn't understand why the cruel children in his playground are ripping him apart for
It, it's normal to him. I think the damage from the bullying is doing alot more damage than stopping would. My friend has admitted she hasn't weaned him off because she loves doing it and that IS selfish.

Maybe she loves it so much because she knows it's best for her child. I enjoy BF because I can see the good it's doing my baby. I'm happy because she's happy. I don't think we should stop doing things for fear of our children being bullied. Kids will always pick on someone who is different but we can't all just follow the mainstream just to avoid being picked on. Hopefully one day extended BF won't be seen as so unusual and kids wouldn't be bullied for it. Maybe your friend could BF in private. There's no need for his friends to know that he's still BF.

 

[stepmum]

Keep it clean please ladies

We've had a really nice discussion and I for one have learned some things I didn't know. It would be a shame to see it go downhill.

 

[mummy2be...]

But the child doesn't know any difference???? Of course they arnt going to want to stop something that they have been having since day dot, and my friends mf doesn't understand why the cruel children in his playground are ripping him apart for
It, it's normal to him. I think the damage from the bullying is doing alot more damage than stopping would. My friend has admitted she hasn't weaned him off because she loves doing it and that IS selfish.

Maybe she loves it so much because she knows it's best for her child. I enjoy BF because I can see the good it's doing my baby. I'm happy because she's happy. I don't think we should stop doing things for fear of our children being bullied. Kids will always pick on someone who is different but we can't all just follow the mainstream just to avoid being picked on. Hopefully one day extended BF won't be seen as so unusual and kids wouldn't be bullied for it. Maybe your friend could BF in private. There's no need for his friends to know that he's still BF.

She does do it privately I believe BUT as I said, to her lb this is the norm, so he goes into school and talks about it to his classmates with no shame... And obviously gets jumped on. If my friend were to tell him to keep it a secret surely then it's behaving as of there's something to be ashamed of?

Idk, in my opinion I think she's doing more damage continuing to bf than stopping..... But that's just my opinion, we all have them

 

[Blah11]

Then its the mothers of the bullies who have to be ashamed, not the mother who is still feeding her child.

If what you say about your friend is true then I assure you, thats very much the tiny minority and NOT the norm.

You say of course the child isnt going to stop but, they do? My LO self weaned. SHE decided she was finished and stopped asking for it

If what I say is true?

..... Can you please be more specific about which part Of what I've said your questioning? I don't need to have a discussion where I'm basically accused of lying- I've got better things to do with my time!

I never called you a liar wtf

 

[Blah11]

But the child doesn't know any difference???? Of course they arnt going to want to stop something that they have been having since day dot, and my friends mf doesn't understand why the cruel children in his playground are ripping him apart for
It, it's normal to him. I think the damage from the bullying is doing alot more damage than stopping would. My friend has admitted she hasn't weaned him off because she loves doing it and that IS selfish.

Maybe she loves it so much because she knows it's best for her child. I enjoy BF because I can see the good it's doing my baby. I'm happy because she's happy. I don't think we should stop doing things for fear of our children being bullied. Kids will always pick on someone who is different but we can't all just follow the mainstream just to avoid being picked on. Hopefully one day extended BF won't be seen as so unusual and kids wouldn't be bullied for it. Maybe your friend could BF in private. There's no need for his friends to know that he's still BF.

She does do it privately I believe BUT as I said, to her lb this is the norm, so he goes into school and talks about it to his classmates with no shame... And obviously gets jumped on. If my friend were to tell him to keep it a secret surely then it's behaving as of there's something to be ashamed of?

Idk, in my opinion I think she's doing more damage continuing to bf than stopping..... But that's just my opinion, we all have them

Why should he be shamed? hes 4 fgs! hardly a teenager. Good on her, and good on him. If breastfeeding was not considered as dirty and done openly in public, not in toilets then children wouldnt be bullied over it as it would be normal and quite rightly so.

 

[XJessicaX]

I havent read all the answers yet.

I think BF at that point is a little unnecessary but each to their own. Not having toys in the house is a bit sad, not all toys are expensive and they are great for development.
I find the co-sleeping just a bit strange though. Like she is desperately clinging to having a 'baby' when her 'babies' are in fact children and probably wouldn't mind their own space! I wonder whether this attachment parenting style is detrimental to a child in any way? Would a child adequately learn independence? I find it slightly smothering and more for the mother than for the child.