I didn't think it would be this hard.

[Bun87]

Our LO is 17 days old, I had a wonderful pregnancy and got to have my drug free home birth. We got transferred to hospital due to meconium in my waters. Feeding didn't get off to a good start - lo wouldn't latch as he was so sleepy and didn't eat for around 36 hours. I didn't really get much support in hospital and struggled at home.

LO lost 15% of his birth weight and we've been supplementing with formula. It looks like I have insufficient glandular tissue which is causing low milk supply. I'm using a supplementary nursing system until a Breast specialist can confirm this or not. Midwife has be on domperidone, fenugreek and double pumping to try and boost my supply.

The first ten days of LO's life were stressful, - We knew he was hungry but couldn't understand why he wasn't feeding properly, he just nibbles, probably because there's not enough milk there to satisfy him.

Anyway, it just doesn't seem like things are getting easier. I hate my body for not being able to feed him. I'm exhausted because he won't settle at night or after any feeds, he'll only sleep in my arms. Dh is back at work today and we have no family or close friends nearby and I just feel so alone.

The feeding system is so fiddly to use, trying to latch a baby and a small pipe gets frustrating. LO ends up getting upset because he's hungry and I get upset because I can't just bfeed him.

I knew it was going to be hard, but I had no idea it would be this hard and so emotionally draining. I just want to enjoy my little boy

 

[pinklightbulb]

If you have to supplement don't feel guilty, it's for your LO's survival. Even if you have to switch to FF, if that's what keeps him, so be it. You're doing a great job with the tools you have and if you need that extra help from a bottle then that's just how it is. It can't be helped and you are a wonderful Mummy no matter how your baby is fed.

I'm sorry you have no real support That must be really tough for you.

 

[Bun87]

I just feel so tired and fed up of using the nursing system. It's supposed to take 20-40 mins for a feed but can take up to 2 hours. By the time were done, LO hasn't had a nap and it's time for his next feed

 

[Sproglet]

Have you had LO checked for tongue tie? A lot of the difficulties you describe could be explained by TT- even the low supply as poor sucking means your supply isn't stimulated as it should be and your body thinks not much milk is needed. There's more info and a support thread on the breastfeeding forum, but you can google catherine Watson genna, she has a fab page with pics and descriptions of sneaker ties.

By the way, you're doing a fab job! I know how hard it is with pumping and feeding, and hating your body for not being able to feed your LO. But you're not a failure, in fact I'd say you're the opposite, sticking with it long after many women would have given in.

 

[socitycourty]

 

[Bun87]

Thanks ladies - I was having a meltdown morning yesterday. Dh first day back at work! Me has checked tongue tie so unfortunately it's not that. Feeling ok today, just tired! X

 

[Sproglet]

Double and triple check- Robyn was checked by 2 different midwives, HV, GP, breastfeeding support worker, all said she was normal.

She was diagnosed with tongue tie and lip tie by a specialist aged 8 weeks.

 

[pinklightbulb]

Hope you're feeling better now

 

[ninamama]

Sorry to hear you are having a hard time. We all want the best for our babies, and in your situation, it could be switching to formula. I feel a lot of pressure to BF, even from friends and family, only my grandmother (who had her kids after the war when everyone gave the bottle) has told me its ok to bottlefeed. Trying to BF was stressful for me and for baby, and now at least I know she's had enough food and is crying for something else, as I was trying to latch her on pretty much constantly because I always thought she was hungry. I ended up with blisters on both my nipples and a constantly borderline hysterical baby. Hope you find your way soon. its really a lot harder than I ever could have imagined having a new baby and no family or friends close by to support you are what I think I missed most.

 

[Scottish mum]

I know nobody tells you it's going to be this hard!!

I had a fab pregnancy and when lo was born I was over the moon but after a week was in shock it's a huge commitment and I think you only realise how your life's changed once you've had them.

The hard work is worth it x

 

[Porcelain]

I agree with everyone; it's tough.
I tried bfing for the first 2 weeks then had to go to formula. They'd never get enough and it was sooo painful! (my men have very high palettes). They only bf once or twice a day and it's a snack at most for them except for their night feed. They dream feed from the breast wonderfully now. I always offer the breast to both my boys, but one usually always refuses except at night. Once they got older it wasn't as painful.
Keep offering the breast here and there so he doesn't forget what to do with it, but put him on formula if he needs it. Don't let anyone guilt you for it; it's a matter of nutrition and sanity.
Our babies loved Nature's Path formula. They had a real hard time with non-organic formulas (for when you run into that problem!)

 

[Snoozey_Puppy]

I know exactly how you are feeling right now, I had the same issue and my lo even had to undergo phototherapy on day 5 because he lost too much weight. At that point I broke down and cried, questioning why my body isn't good enough to breastfeed my son. I was full of guilt. I struggled with breastfeeding for another 2 months and switched to ff. Now at 4 months and looking back, I knew I made the right choice by switching to ff as it is best for me and my baby. (I would have lost my sanity if I didn't!!)

I hope you will have better luck than me in breastfeeding, but don't get pressurised by it. Whatever you choose to do in the end will be the right choice for both you and your lo. Good luck hun!

 

[Snoozey_Puppy]

Just to add... I also tried using the feeding system... Going to private lactation consultant... Taking fenugreek/ domperidone/ mother's milk tea (I was desperate!!) I'm so glad that episode is over!!! And yes you will definately enjoy your lo soon!!

 

[Bun87]

This just popped up and I recognised it as a thread that I started in those early days. I'm happy to say that I still offer lo the boob, mostly at night, and he is also supplemented with formula. Things are so much better now. He goes down for naps and sleeps so well at night. This post seems like such a long time ago, it almost doesn't seem that bad anymore to anyone struggling, it does get better I promise! X