I don't know what to do with the father of my child. Help please?

[Jessy Caye]

I am 19 years old and a freshman in college. I left my university when I found out that I was pregnant. I'm about two months along. My boyfriend (Who is now my ex) and I were together for almost four years and this is his child. He has been supportive and offered to go with me to the doctors appointments and hold my hand. He claims he still loves me and would want nothing more than to be with me but that our relationship is bad for him. That is because he thinks that I won't change for him, he wants me to not act like I am better than him and to think before I say something hurtful. I do normally think and I never want him to think he's worthless or unimportant to me. But apparently I come off that way. He has changed some things for me though I only wanted him to change because I thought he would benefit, which he has by gaining more close friends and job opportunities. But he has left the relationship claiming he wants to still be in it but he has another girl, one of my best friends, who he has been going out with. He says that he's just going with the flow and not planning anything and that he doesn't want to hurt me, but I can't help but feel like I'm being played second fiddle as he explores his new relationship. I'm confused as to whether I should hold his hand, and play with his hair like he always loves me to do, and basically go out on dates with him or if I should tell him he can come to the doctors appointments and be with me through things but we shouldn't see one another if he's going out with this other girl??

 

[xCherylx]

IMO, I wouldn't let him have both. Let him be as involved as he wants with the pregnancy (only fair), let him go to appointments but no holding hands or couple stuff. If he has another girl no matter how serious he needs to respect u and her and not just use you when he wants

 

[Tam]

No way would I be contemplating how tactile I should be, unless it is a boot up the arse!!!!! He is seeing your mate and finished with you and you are wanting to do 'couple' stuff?!?

Lucky him going with the flow not planning anything, and there you are pregnant with his child having to grow up very quickly and make plans! Hardly a man is he?

Leave him to get on with whatever he thinks he is doing, he has a lot of growing up to do. Let him go to appointments with you, for support, but get some self respect and make him respect you too, even if it is just as the mother of his child!!!!

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but honestly he is a pig and you need to see him for what he is, and realise how your actions will make you look to him and what they will be saying to him!

Good Luck hun! x

 

[Vickie]

I agree wholeheartedly with what Tam said. He's not good enough for you!

 

[xarlenex]

Yea I agree with Tam too. Hes messing with your feelings at one of, if not thee most sensitive time of your life. He needs to get his act together.

 

[Always&4ever]

I agree with Tam, let him be involved with the pregnancy and the LO but nothing else

 

[leeanne]

I agree, don't open the door to him. First it's wrong of him to be seeing your friend....wrong of her too to do this to you.

He can't have his cake and eat it too. You are better off without him.