R
Roma3
Guest
Ever since I can remember I have always wanted boys. 4 boys was my dream family.
That's all I ever saw myelf having, but since falling pregnant I have realised that that choice isn't actually up to you! Me and my OH wanted a boy so much and even admitted to each other we would be gutted if it was a girl, we had all the boys names we liked, looked at clothes for the boy and spoke about how he would be.
I went for a gender scan and I kinda knew I was expecting a girl to be honest, it may sound silly but I just "felt" it. This is our first baby and wasn't planned but we are happy now and looking forward to becoming parents... but anyway, we went for the scan and the lady asked me if I had a preference and I said boy.... She says she was 80% sure it was a girl and saw I was ready to burst into tears and said but there is still a 20% chance it could be a boy as didnt get an amazing view. Now I saw inbetween that babies legs, we all did and there was nothing there so I think she wants me to come back for a rescan to be kind to me just to see.
I am mixed emotions. I am pissed at the sonographer - if she wasn't 100% then I would rather she shut her mouth and say she wasn't sure. I cried and was gutted as have not got the son I longed for as my OH did, I feel like he wont love her as much as he would a son. I feel like I have let him down and I said to him I was so sorry I couldnt give him a son, I feel a failure. He is being totally cool about it and says yeah he wanted a boy but is warming to the idea and is happy as long as baby is healthy and this morning he asked how his "girls" were doing. He is taking this better than me.
I dont know why I am writing this post really, nothing can be changed now I just have to get used to the idea and maybe if I ever have another child that could be the son I always wanted.
That's all I ever saw myelf having, but since falling pregnant I have realised that that choice isn't actually up to you! Me and my OH wanted a boy so much and even admitted to each other we would be gutted if it was a girl, we had all the boys names we liked, looked at clothes for the boy and spoke about how he would be.
I went for a gender scan and I kinda knew I was expecting a girl to be honest, it may sound silly but I just "felt" it. This is our first baby and wasn't planned but we are happy now and looking forward to becoming parents... but anyway, we went for the scan and the lady asked me if I had a preference and I said boy.... She says she was 80% sure it was a girl and saw I was ready to burst into tears and said but there is still a 20% chance it could be a boy as didnt get an amazing view. Now I saw inbetween that babies legs, we all did and there was nothing there so I think she wants me to come back for a rescan to be kind to me just to see.
I am mixed emotions. I am pissed at the sonographer - if she wasn't 100% then I would rather she shut her mouth and say she wasn't sure. I cried and was gutted as have not got the son I longed for as my OH did, I feel like he wont love her as much as he would a son. I feel like I have let him down and I said to him I was so sorry I couldnt give him a son, I feel a failure. He is being totally cool about it and says yeah he wanted a boy but is warming to the idea and is happy as long as baby is healthy and this morning he asked how his "girls" were doing. He is taking this better than me.
I dont know why I am writing this post really, nothing can be changed now I just have to get used to the idea and maybe if I ever have another child that could be the son I always wanted.