I have my 14 week scan next week.. (advice wanted)

[Louise]

Hey guys, I think you have figured out by now that im a natural born worrier, right? so this question will not come as much of a shock to you.
Ok, so I have a scan next week which will make me 14 weeks along, I dunno why my midwife waited so long to transfer me to the hospital but either way, I cant do anything about it now can I?

Anyway, when I had my first scan at 7.4 weeks, I was terrified they wouldnt find baby or heartbeat, but they did. At that time I had no symptoms at all but they all came on a few days later and lasted until around 10 weeks or so before dissapearing. I have only thrown up the once and only get nauseated when I get breathless and I find myself having to lie down for a while.
Im so scared that when I go for my scan nest week, that I have had one of those missed miscarriages or whatever they are called, now I know they cant be prevented but my DR told me at my last visit that he cant remember the last timehe had a paitent suffer from that kind of loss, but I have been reading online and have noticed more people suffering from missed miscarriages than any other, and quite frankly its really frightening me.
No miscarriage is pleasant and I hope my post doesnt upset anyone,but the way I see it, if Im going to loose a baby, I would like to know it is happening rather than to just miscarry and not know about it, does that make sense?

I dont have many symptoms now, just ligament pain, tender-ish breast, headaches and weird breathlessness that I assume is caused by the increase in blood flow which increases heart rate, and very rearly I may feel a little queezy, but o ther than that, nothing.
Im considering not going to my appointment next week because of this fright I have- Does anyone have any advice for me? I have nobody to talk to as everyone feels Im being paranoid. *sighs*
Thank you for reading guys. x

 

[Tam]

Hun, I understand that you are reading it online, but that is because there are support groups or advice that is easily obtained, if you was to ask people in general you would find that it is very rare. It is also a fact that it is very rare, so please do try not to worry! We all have these concerns, but by not going to your appointment you are not going to be able to rest, you need to do it for your own piece of mind and to check baby is OK!

There is no reason that you should be one of the unfortuante few, but please put it into perspective......it is very rare, so please try to stop worrying babe, but go to the appointment to make yourself feel better!

Good luck for next week hun, let us know how you get on.

 

[Trinity]

Good luck for next week Louise .. as Tam said it is very rare so try not to worry.

Hope everything goes well .. keep us updated.

x

 

[Louise]

Thanks so much guys!
My DR said it was rare, like 1% of pregnancy or something stupid like that, but reading certain pregnancy forums etc, and hearing how many women have suffered these losses, and knowing they are meant to be rare, it doesnt help at all.

By the way Tam, I was watching your ticker count down for around 2 weeks before you were induced, when I finally saw that Alfie was born, I was thrilled for you. How is the little fella and is he everything you had imagined? x congrats by the way!

 

[Tam]

Thanks so much guys!
My DR said it was rare, like 1% of pregnancy or something stupid like that, but reading certain pregnancy forums etc, and hearing how many women have suffered these losses, and knowing they are meant to be rare, it doesnt help at all.

Just remember that the only reason you are seeing all those stories is because like this forum it is where people will go for support (I don't mean that patronising babe, I just mean that is why it is so scary and there are so many to be found)



By the way Tam, I was watching your ticker count down for around 2 weeks before you were induced, when I finally saw that Alfie was born, I was thrilled for you. How is the little fella and is he everything you had imagined? x congrats by the way!

Awwwww Thank you babe!! It is so lovely having a baby around again it really is, I am loving every minute of it! He is everything and more, I am longing to do it all over agian LOL!! It is just so amazing, you will be bowled over when your time comes babe!

 

[Louise]

Awwwww Thank you babe!! It is so lovely having a baby around again it really is, I am loving every minute of it! He is everything and more, I am longing to do it all over agian LOL!! It is just so amazing, you will be bowled over when your time comes babe!

So how did it all go? They induced you etc:, you obviously went into labour- did everything go ok?

I spoke to my DR and told him I wanted an elective CSection, he said it was possible but then my midwife said no, which really sucked majorly because Im such a wimp and know I will panic excessively when the time comes, PLUS, im scared of poo-ing myself lol.

Is Alfie a good baby or does he wake up every 2 hours demanding to be fed? Apparently, though I dont know how true this is, if you cut down on caffeine, you have more chance of having a quieter baby because caffeine can cause babies to have problems sleeping etc: I dont know how true that is though.

So tell me all that went on in the hospital as I am dying to know.

 

[Imi]

Good luck with the scan all wil be fine!
xxx

 

[Tam]

So how did it all go? They induced you etc:, you obviously went into labour- did everything go ok?

I spoke to my DR and told him I wanted an elective CSection, he said it was possible but then my midwife said no, which really sucked majorly because Im such a wimp and know I will panic excessively when the time comes, PLUS, im scared of poo-ing myself lol.

Is Alfie a good baby or does he wake up every 2 hours demanding to be fed? Apparently, though I dont know how true this is, if you cut down on caffeine, you have more chance of having a quieter baby because caffeine can cause babies to have problems sleeping etc: I dont know how true that is though.

So tell me all that went on in the hospital as I am dying to know.

Well the short basic story of it is:

I did go in to be induced, but that day they didn't know their head from their elbow, I was told stay home at first as there was no beds, then when we did get there there was no bed made, we eventually got showed to my bed then told "we will be with you shortly, we are waiting for the monitoring machine" and told again, and again and again, they then decided that as it had gone 5.30pm by this time that they needed to contact a registrar to see that it was OK to go ahead with the induction at that time (I have never heard anything like it, as I know that 10pm is one of the slots for induction). Anyway I was eventually told I would have it done the next day.......

At 5.30am the next morning when they came to examine me, the machine which monitors the babies heartbeat was showing I was having contractions and on examination I was 3 cms dilated.....well this was ace, as I couldn't feel a thing BUT during the examination they couldn't tell if Alfie was breech or not, so I was examined a few times by different people, then they decided I had to have a scan.....YAY he was not breech!


I was admitted to the labour ward from the ward I was on at 9.00am, but eventually got there at 10.00am after waiting on the scan.....I stayed comfortable and unaware of the contractions until til 7.30pm that night when I had to have an assisted ARM, and when I say assisted, Alfie was not engaged so a Doctor had to put his hand inside me and grab hold of Alfie's head to assist him down into the pelvis, as there was a danger that as the water came out, the cord would come out before Alfie engaged and Alfie could land on it and cut off his air supply. That was so uncomfy I can't tell you It made me swear, and I am so aware of what I am doing, so I try not to swear but I had no choice Anyway once that happened, I started feeling the contractions and they came on thick and fast and before long I was needing more than gas and air.....

Cut a long story short, Alfie never did engage and after 10hrs of active labour, a change of midwives, a midwife with a terrible bedside manor who spoke to Paul and my sister like they were shit and no letting me know what the plans were norr any care and reseting the flow metre for my epidural or no concern for my SPD, I had to be taken into Theatre where they had to put me into stirrups, tip the bed on its side and help me push, I was very lucky as they were considering a possible C-Section, but I managed to push him out and they had to use a suction cap, but he came out with a tiny cry, was plonked on my belly and grabbed hold of my little finger, which made me cry and it was all over!

The best bit about the experience, was although I had an epidural, I could feel Alfie being born, there was no pain at all, but I could feel him coming out, it was brilliant........and then when he grabbed hold of my finger, that was just sooooo lovely, I got all choked up!

He is a very good baby, we don't even know we have him.....he is feeding an average of every 2-3 hours but he has a rotten cold so he takes what he can manage with his bunged up nose, then tops up again, but then he will sleep for 5-7 hours.

As for the caffeine, I knew nothing about it when PG with Jade and she was as mellow as anything, she was another one we never knew we had......and she went thru the night from 3 weeks old.....sadly Alfie has had his cold from 3 weeks, but he is getting over it slowly, but is happy and content non the less!

 

[Louise]

Well the short basic story of it is:

I did go in to be induced, but that day they didn't know their head from their elbow, I was told stay home at first as there was no beds, then when we did get there there was no bed made, we eventually got showed to my bed then told "we will be with you shortly, we are waiting for the monitoring machine" and told again, and again and again, they then decided that as it had gone 5.30pm by this time that they needed to contact a registrar to see that it was OK to go ahead with the induction at that time (I have never heard anything like it, as I know that 10pm is one of the slots for induction). Anyway I was eventually told I would have it done the next day.......

At 5.30am the next morning when they came to examine me, the machine which monitors the babies heartbeat was showing I was having contractions and on examination I was 3 cms dilated.....well this was ace, as I couldn't feel a thing BUT during the examination they couldn't tell if Alfie was breech or not, so I was examined a few times by different people, then they decided I had to have a scan.....YAY he was not breech!


I was admitted to the labour ward from the ward I was on at 9.00am, but eventually got there at 10.00am after waiting on the scan.....I stayed comfortable and unaware of the contractions until til 7.30pm that night when I had to have an assisted ARM, and when I say assisted, Alfie was not engaged so a Doctor had to put his hand inside me and grab hold of Alfie's head to assist him down into the pelvis, as there was a danger that as the water came out, the cord would come out before Alfie engaged and Alfie could land on it and cut off his air supply. That was so uncomfy I can't tell you It made me swear, and I am so aware of what I am doing, so I try not to swear but I had no choice Anyway once that happened, I started feeling the contractions and they came on thick and fast and before long I was needing more than gas and air.....

Cut a long story short, Alfie never did engage and after 10hrs of active labour, a change of midwives, a midwife with a terrible bedside manor who spoke to Paul and my sister like they were shit and no letting me know what the plans were norr any care and reseting the flow metre for my epidural or no concern for my SPD, I had to be taken into Theatre where they had to put me into stirrups, tip the bed on its side and help me push, I was very lucky as they were considering a possible C-Section, but I managed to push him out and they had to use a suction cap, but he came out with a tiny cry, was plonked on my belly and grabbed hold of my little finger, which made me cry and it was all over!

The best bit about the experience, was although I had an epidural, I could feel Alfie being born, there was no pain at all, but I could feel him coming out, it was brilliant........and then when he grabbed hold of my finger, that was just sooooo lovely, I got all choked up!

He is a very good baby, we don't even know we have him.....he is feeding an average of every 2-3 hours but he has a rotten cold so he takes what he can manage with his bunged up nose, then tops up again, but then he will sleep for 5-7 hours.

As for the caffeine, I knew nothing about it when PG with Jade and she was as mellow as anything, she was another one we never knew we had......and she went thru the night from 3 weeks old.....sadly Alfie has had his cold from 3 weeks, but he is getting over it slowly, but is happy and content non the less!

Hey there, sorry I didnt reply sooner.
Wow, 10 hours of active labour and nothing? That would drive me absolutely insane, I mean they say that for first time mothers the average labour tiime is 13 hours, so I cant imagine how frustrating it was for you being through it once already and having to endure 10 hours of labour with nothing really happening.
It must have been an odd sensation feeling Alfie being born even though you had drugs, some women cant feel a damn thing and apparently this can cause a distressed labour? though I dont know how true that is as I have never had a baby (as of yet)

Its so funny you should mention your second midwife being rude because mine is EXACTLY the same and I am contemplating asking for someone else. When I met mine for the first time she was more than aware that I was absolutely terrified of ANYTHING and everything relating to health/medical, so it was pretty obvious that I was going to panic- well all she could say to me was "Well, I want a quiet life"; I mean SERIOUSLY, this woman works with pregnant women, how on earth is she going to have a quiet life?

I'm telling ya, some people are so bloody rude.

In regards to Alfie and the little scare of having his oxygen supply cut off, that muts have been terrifying for you. It must be terrifying for anyone having to hear something like that, but thankfully he's here today and going strong.

Babies these days really can outlive ANYTHING; I mean when I was born I was 2 months prem weighing only 1lb, maybe 1 and a half, and I was very very unwell- My mother was drinking when pregnant, taking drugs, sniffing glue, you name it, she did it which is probably why I ended up so ill by having water and blood on the brain, but babies these days, wow, having water/blood on the brain is something minor this day and age, where-as when I was born it was most certainly something very major.
And did you hear about that baby born at 26 weeks? (or maybe it was 24?)
Children are such fighters and that's normally progressing before they're even born.

I'm so glad that everything worked out fine for you despite your long labour and worries that baby was breech (I breech baby has got to hurt, SURELY?)
Alfie is a gorgeous little boy and you should be very proud of him and yourself for producing something so special.
Again, about that midwife, if you decide to have more children and end up seeing her again, smack her in the mouth from me will ya

Oh and lastly, I hope Alfie gets rid of his cold soon. It must be awful for the little man having a bunged up nose, it's bad enough for us and we're meant to be adults lol.

 

[Tam]

Awwwwww Thank you so much babe!!

Well done you for coming thru so much......WOW!! As you say, babies are fighters, you just wouldn't believe it to look at them would you, they are so tiny and helpless, but boy do they fight!

That baby born at 24 weeks, that was just amazing!!! That really choked me up!

I really wish you all the best with your pregnancy hun, but don't worry about your MW being there for ther delivery, as it is very rare that this happens timing wise.....although I was lucky enough first time round to get mine, and she was absolutely lovely!

Look after yourself babe and I really wish you a lovely birthing experience! x