i just need to vent sorry

[sailorgirl20]

so to start out me and my hubby have been trying for almost 5 years with 2 miscarriages and low sperm. its been a difficult time for both of us, we only found out a year ago this month he has low sperm count!

here lately its like im realizing things i never realized before. now everyone in the family found out last year we were trying to start our family when we found out about his low sperm count, we tried to keep it a secret till we got pregnant, the only people whom knew we were trying was his parents. i mean we get A LOT of support from my family i wish i told them rather then telling my dh's parents first. we try not to get them very involved in this journey but when my mom does get involved she is amazing help doing research and coming up with ideas (lol bless her heart, even giving bedding ideas lol) but lately im having so much anger towards my hubbys mom, i mean since our miscarriage 2 novembers ago, shes been distant and making sure we get the point that her 23-24 year old friend and her son is more important then her dil and son. she came over a while ago and started talking about them since then i have been keeping distant, well she came over yesterday and i think she now knows how i feel because once hubbys father started talking about them she kinds just looked at the ground, i dont know what changed but i still dont feel like having a relationship with her, the fact that she knows were having complications in concieving and she decides to tell me how her friend son is like a grandchild she doesnt have really hurts and how she cant seem to put family first, she has told me to involve her and when i try to shes to busy. thats is one of my vents thats been hurting me today

the other vent is the last 3 weeks my hubby has recieved great news at work, one was that an old coworker (she quit because she and her hubby were trying to have there first baby and she was having complications concieving) she has been confirmed she is having twins through ivf i believe she said! and the second news was that a guy hes working with (just married in marched, found out they were expecting in june ) could be having twins, dont get me wrong i feel happy deep deep down inside for them, but it hurts i mean here are two people who both either have a hard time concieving or "wasnt" supposed to be able to concieve and they did it, within 2 years and here i am on year five trying my hardest to make it so we can start our family.

the fact my hubby texts me with all this great news and knows i just dont want to hear it lately, hurts! i have been the last few hours sat down crying, but then i came on here and i know how supportive you girls are i just need someone to talk to! i feel like this is never going to happen for us sorry for the vent just a really bad day today!

how are we supposed to stay strong?

 

[arizonagal]

Sorry girl! Did your hubby maybe text you because he was sad about the news? I know some guys don't care, but some are just as sad as us. I say avoid the people who make you sad-who needs em?

 

[sailorgirl20]

he didnt seem hurt when he came home and talked about it again i had to tell him that i wasnt in the mood to really hear about it! i feel selfish but i mean after 5 years of ttc and like all the girls we know on fb or around us getting pregnant with out ttc is just upsetting, i really need a break from all this happy news!

 

[tamithomas]

I'm so sorry to hear. It really does seem unfair at times. My DH did a booboo like that once, I just sat him down and talked it over and hasn't done it since. He was looking at pictures of a friend of ours baby not even 2 weeks after my MC like as if it was nothing. He was hurt don't get me wrong but my levels of empathy are so much higher than his