• Xenforo Cloud upgraded our forum to XenForo version 2.3.4. This update has created styling issues to our current templates. We will continue to work on clearing up these issues for the next few days, but please report any other issues you may experience so we can look into. Thanks for your patience and understanding.

I know you ladies will let me vent a little...

Miss_Awesome

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 17, 2012
Messages
119
Reaction score
0
My signature says that we've been TTC since August of 2011, which is true. However, we went without protection of any kind since we got married in April of 2011. Prior to that our ONLY source of birth control was condoms. This is probably why we figured getting pregnant would be as simple as ditching those and going unprotected. Obviously, that didn't happen and we're at 20 months TTC, give or take.

So, DH must have been in some kind of denial or just wanted to make me miserable by not going to get a semen analysis. Finally, after pleading with him every time AF got me and telling him that I will stop talking about it if he goes and gets one, he made an appointment. It was today with his doctor on base (he's military).

The guy ordered the semen analysis for some time next week and spent the rest of the appointment talking about non-TTC stuff like high blood pressure and medicines to treat a problem he doesn't have. :wacko: I figured that was the end of the story until my DH says he actually spent a majority of the time talking to the nurse before being seen by the doctor. I've been there for other things and had the same experience. Only, this lady told him we're "trying too hard!" and then went on to talk about when SHE became pregnant she was "relaxed" and that's what we need to do. She told him her sisters had trouble conceiving, but lo' and behold, when they "stopped thinking about it, it happened! Just relax!!"

This is the second most annoying thing we've encountered while TTC since my Nurse Practitioner I was seeing for infertility told me "Just relax!" and in the same breath told me, "Just adopt!" Just relax! Just relax! Just--no, I never freaking THOUGHT of that?!:dohh: It's one thing to hear from fertile friends who just want me to shut up, but a two supposed medical "professionals." WHY are people so insensitive--no, make that stupid?!!?

Thanks, just needed to vent to people who would understand!:growlmad:
 
I get that ALOT and I just want to slap them! Ive been actively TTC since June 2011, but NTNP our entire almost 11 year relationship. I think I was on birthcontrol for MAYBE 3 months. It is frustrating when fertile people say stuff like that, especially medical professionals. Im lucky that my OBGYN went through fertility issues when him and his wife were trying for their first so I dont get any of that from him. Good luck! Hope we both get our BFPs!
 
I get that ALOT and I just want to slap them! Ive been actively TTC since June 2011, but NTNP our entire almost 11 year relationship. I think I was on birthcontrol for MAYBE 3 months. It is frustrating when fertile people say stuff like that, especially medical professionals. Im lucky that my OBGYN went through fertility issues when him and his wife were trying for their first so I dont get any of that from him. Good luck! Hope we both get our BFPs!

Thanks! :) I hope those BFPs are on their way for us too! I hate this never-ending waiting game of TTC.

I can't believe people who are meant to help give such AWFUL advice. I just imagine there being a handful of women and men out there who take this bad advice to heart. As in maybe they believe that if a medical professional says to just relax that maybe that's helpful. Ugh! So frustrating.
 
Oh god, that is the worst thing that people can say. If I had a pound for every time someone said "relax it will happen" or being told that I'm obsessed and that's why it hasn't happened, focus on something else, blah blah bleeding blah! I know how frustrating it is. How can you relax when it takes up pretty much every inch of your brain 24/7! I tried to relax but it was never going to happen. And against what everyone said, the month I fell with my son, we tried harder than ever. We were coming up for IVF a few months after I fell pregnant and people said "that's why you fell pregnant, because you relaxed". Wrong! I fell pregnant because the thought of going through IVF scared the life out of me so we tried extra hard to try to get that BFP and that is how it happened.

For some people, they can relax and "it will happen", but for most, it's something that consumes pretty much your whole life. I want at least one more baby and even now I have my son, I'm still constantly thinking about when I'm fertile, when we should have sex, etc.

If you can relax then great, but if you can't, you can't. It is so easy for fertile people to say that. They haven't experienced the pain and stress that TTC causes x
 
Oh god, that is the worst thing that people can say. If I had a pound for every time someone said "relax it will happen" or being told that I'm obsessed and that's why it hasn't happened, focus on something else, blah blah bleeding blah! I know how frustrating it is. How can you relax when it takes up pretty much every inch of your brain 24/7! I tried to relax but it was never going to happen. And against what everyone said, the month I fell with my son, we tried harder than ever. We were coming up for IVF a few months after I fell pregnant and people said "that's why you fell pregnant, because you relaxed". Wrong! I fell pregnant because the thought of going through IVF scared the life out of me so we tried extra hard to try to get that BFP and that is how it happened.

For some people, they can relax and "it will happen", but for most, it's something that consumes pretty much your whole life. I want at least one more baby and even now I have my son, I'm still constantly thinking about when I'm fertile, when we should have sex, etc.

If you can relax then great, but if you can't, you can't. It is so easy for fertile people to say that. They haven't experienced the pain and stress that TTC causes x

It really is the worst! She hinted that her sisters had tried for a "long time" of six whole months or so. I'd be insanely rich if we were paid every time a well-meaning (or rude!) person told us to relax. I get the feeling that because we open up about it with some people they just assume that since it seems like something hard to go through (because it IS!), we must be so stressed out. In actually, I only really get stressed when I hear terrible advice like that. A bunch of know-it-alls who actually know nothing is what they are!

That's great that you're able to prove them wrong by having gotten pregnant during the month you tried hardest! I've never had a confirmed BFP and pretty much hate FRERs due to evaps, but I was able to get one test where the line showed up right away and no squinting was required. My period was three weeks late and immediately after that test, AF came on. The odd part was that really was the month we tried our hardest. We'd BD on schedule, used Preseed, Softcups, Robitussin, etc. That's the closest we've come to pregnancy, but it was also the month we tried harder than ever.

Those people who say just relax know nothing.
 
I remember someone once wrote "when I first started ttc I was relaxed because I didn't think it would be hard or that I would run into problems. I tried the relax thing FIRST and it didn't work." Lol. I think this is true for many of us.

I hate stupid people who say things like this. When someone once told me this I replied "no amount of relaxing is going to fix my damaged tubes". Uuh silence, yes, that's right stupid people just saying without thinking.

Also I just want to add. Reseach on ivf and stress shows that it has ne impact on the eoutcome.
 
I agree with you guys..I was telling a co worker who is coming up on her first year of ttc that at a year there must be something to fix so that her gyn should not have a problem looking into things unless she is an asshat.
 
I remember someone once wrote "when I first started ttc I was relaxed because I didn't think it would be hard or that I would run into problems. I tried the relax thing FIRST and it didn't work." Lol. I think this is true for many of us.

I hate stupid people who say things like this. When someone once told me this I replied "no amount of relaxing is going to fix my damaged tubes". Uuh silence, yes, that's right stupid people just saying without thinking.

Also I just want to add. Reseach on ivf and stress shows that it has ne impact on the eoutcome.

lol I hear you my in laws had the nerve to say to us to watch out for the two buck chuck wine at trader joes because that got them pregnant with son number 2..There is not 2 buck chuck in the world
 
I remember someone once wrote "when I first started ttc I was relaxed because I didn't think it would be hard or that I would run into problems. I tried the relax thing FIRST and it didn't work." Lol. I think this is true for many of us.

I hate stupid people who say things like this. When someone once told me this I replied "no amount of relaxing is going to fix my damaged tubes". Uuh silence, yes, that's right stupid people just saying without thinking.

Also I just want to add. Reseach on ivf and stress shows that it has ne impact on the eoutcome.

lol I hear you my in laws had the nerve to say to us to watch out for the two buck chuck wine at trader joes because that got them pregnant with son number 2..There is not 2 buck chuck in the world

You ladies crack me up. :haha: Not sure what I'd do if I didn't know there were women out there who've heard it all before too. I swear, when there's actually a problem and people keep handing out the crappy advice, I cringe. It's like they really are too stupid or don't hear what they said. Lol
 
I know that is so annoying...there's something like a 20% chance that you can get pregnant if you do everything right. It's kind of hard not to think about it when you're taking temps every morning and remember to pee on an ovulation stick at the same time every day (hold the pee for 4 hours and no drinking water) to make sure you have sex at the right time but not too much or it might have a negative effect on the spermies.... and if you don't do all this odds are you'll probably miss your window and not get preganant anyways...all this after months and months of trying and stupid AF showing up every month....and every month that goes by you feel older and the clock continuously ticks...yeah...it's really easy to relax... insensitive people that just don't understand...I feel you ladies xoxo
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Members online

No members online now.

Latest posts

Forum statistics

Threads
1,650,356
Messages
27,147,433
Members
255,798
Latest member
mamaof2_2020
Back
Top
monitoring_string = "c48fb0faa520c8dfff8c4deab485d3d2"
<-- Admiral -->