Amos2009
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Hope you ladies don't mind me popping in. Sorry to come in on such a sour note, but I am about to go through my 4th loss. Here is the short story- I am 37, hubby is 43 and we have been trying for our first baby together. He has a daughter from his first marriage.
May 2009 I got pregnant, went along to nearly 12 weeks then went for an ultrasound only for them to tell me there was no heartbeat. Had a D&C in July.
Got pregnant again in September only to mc in October at 7 weeks. Needed another D&C in the end.
Amazingly got pregnant again in January only to find out the baby was in my left tube. Had emergency surgery February 9th where instead of taking out my tube it was cut in half and sutured up. I was then referred to a fertility specialist where they ran a million tests and told me everything was "normal". How in the world can everything be normal when I have lost 3 babies???
March 23 I was supposed to go in for my CD2 bloodwork and since AF had not shown up I thought, well, I will take a pregnancy test even though I know I'm not pregnant. Boy was I wrong- a positive popped up right away. I actually felt so positive this time because I thought I had been through it all and maybe this would be my miracle baby. Well- I went to have my levels tested Wednesday this week and they were at 108, but today they have fallen to 101. Doctor said I am either going to mc again, or it's another pregnancy in my tube. And of course it's the tube that was sutured up because I seem to always ovulate from that side.
I am so numb right now I cannot even cry. I don't know what our next steps will be, and I am not even sure I can keep trying. My body is so tired- it has been a terrible 10 months for me. I normally do not ask why me or whine about things that happen, but I just don't understand what I have done in my life that makes me deserve all this.
Anyway- there is really no point in this post, I guess I just needed to let it all out. Thanks for listening.
May 2009 I got pregnant, went along to nearly 12 weeks then went for an ultrasound only for them to tell me there was no heartbeat. Had a D&C in July.
Got pregnant again in September only to mc in October at 7 weeks. Needed another D&C in the end.
Amazingly got pregnant again in January only to find out the baby was in my left tube. Had emergency surgery February 9th where instead of taking out my tube it was cut in half and sutured up. I was then referred to a fertility specialist where they ran a million tests and told me everything was "normal". How in the world can everything be normal when I have lost 3 babies???
March 23 I was supposed to go in for my CD2 bloodwork and since AF had not shown up I thought, well, I will take a pregnancy test even though I know I'm not pregnant. Boy was I wrong- a positive popped up right away. I actually felt so positive this time because I thought I had been through it all and maybe this would be my miracle baby. Well- I went to have my levels tested Wednesday this week and they were at 108, but today they have fallen to 101. Doctor said I am either going to mc again, or it's another pregnancy in my tube. And of course it's the tube that was sutured up because I seem to always ovulate from that side.
I am so numb right now I cannot even cry. I don't know what our next steps will be, and I am not even sure I can keep trying. My body is so tired- it has been a terrible 10 months for me. I normally do not ask why me or whine about things that happen, but I just don't understand what I have done in my life that makes me deserve all this.
Anyway- there is really no point in this post, I guess I just needed to let it all out. Thanks for listening.
.. dont worry, we r all here for each other..
xxx
