If you 35+, don't give up hope...

[okmomma]

Just wanted to give all of us over 35 some positive information. I am 36 years old, and just got a this morning. It was our first month ttc, we didn't temp or chart. We just around the fertile time. Also, I always spot 2-5 days before AF. Apparently that had nothing to do with fertility. I think the age 35 is just a number they like to say. Good luck to all of you!

 

[Macwooly]

Congratulations okmamma

Wishing you a happy & healthy pregnancy

 

[Claireyb1]

What great news!! congrats.
Good to hear the over 35 success stories!

 

[Desperado167]

Brilliant news you.well doneXxx

 

[Ruth2307]

Really great news and I'm so glad you shared it with us.

Just as an aside - Am I mistaken but I thought we were 'banned' from announcing BFPs in this section of the forum??

This is a classic example of why I don't think they should be. It's heartwarming and encouraging to hear this type of happy news from a fellow 35+ TTCer and I love to share in other women's joy.

Apologies for hijacking the post but thought that this was a case in point.

Once again huge congratulations and I hope you have a happy and healty pregnancy.
xxxx

 

[Cui]

Congratulations!

 

[okmomma]

Thanks for all the congrats!

Ruth - it wasn't meant to be an announcement. I just wanted to give everyone some positive information. I know that most things that I read made me feel like it would take a long time to get pregnant, or it might not happen at all. It was very disheartning thinking I might not be able to have another child. Wanted to give everyone some hope.

 

[Ruth2307]

Thanks for all the congrats!

Ruth - it wasn't meant to be an announcement. I just wanted to give everyone some positive information. I know that most things that I read made me feel like it would take a long time to get pregnant, or it might not happen at all. It was very disheartning thinking I might not be able to have another child. Wanted to give everyone some hope.

I have been deliberating on whether or not to reply to this and I've decided to go for it. I am little confused: If your post wasn't an announcement then what exactly was it? Yes I realise you say you were trying to give us hope and I am genuinely happy for you and it's good to hear some good news however many of us have been trying for our first for a very, very long time. How did you think you would be giving us hope if you managed to get pregnant with your second first time around?

I hope I won't get shot down in flames for writing this and I hope you can see what I'm trying to say.

 

[sarahincanada]

Thanks for all the congrats!

Ruth - it wasn't meant to be an announcement. I just wanted to give everyone some positive information. I know that most things that I read made me feel like it would take a long time to get pregnant, or it might not happen at all. It was very disheartning thinking I might not be able to have another child. Wanted to give everyone some hope.

I have been deliberating on whether or not to reply to this and I've decided to go for it. I am little confused: If your post wasn't an announcement then what exactly was it? Yes I realise you say you were trying to give us hope and I am genuinely happy for you and it's good to hear some good news however many of us have been trying for our first for a very, very long time. How did you think you would be giving us hope if you managed to get pregnant with your second first time around?

I hope I won't get shot down in flames for writing this and I hope you can see what I'm trying to say.

I have to say I agree, although okmomma Im sure your post was meant in a positive way and Im not trying to be nasty here at all. Its just hearing someone got their BFP first time trying is not really helpful! and at 35, you are only just into 35-40 age group, so Im not really surprised it happened quickly for you. And to say 'We just around the fertile time' seems so flippant...we all around the fertile time and most of us did not get pregnant first time around so I think you are somewhat an exception. I know you were trying to give hope so I hate even replying with this, congrats and a H&H 9 months!

 

[Glowstar]

Not wanting to rain on anyone's parade but there is nothing worse than sour grapes in my honest opinion. I am 40 and TTC my 3rd with a big age gap. I had my DD's in my twenties and yes I conceived first time with both, doesn't make me a bad person I am now on my 7th cycle of trying, I agree it is different because I already have kids. Does that mean I don't deserve a BFP if and when I get it....and that I can only announce it to people who already have kids for fear of upsetting everyone else

 

[babywilliams1]

Not wanting to rain on anyone's parade but there is nothing worse than sour grapes in my honest opinion. I am 40 and TTC my 3rd with a big age gap. I had my DD's in my twenties and yes I conceived first time with both, doesn't make me a bad person I am now on my 7th cycle of trying, I agree it is different because I already have kids. Does that mean I don't deserve a BFP if and when I get it....and that I can only announce it to people who already have kids for fear of upsetting everyone else

i am new to this board, and i have been on a few, and i have to say that i get just a little tired of the "neg nancy's"... not to be rude, or negative myself


i think IMHO, that ANYONE who gets a ANYTIME/ANYWHERE/ANYHOW, should be given respect. I believe that you treat others as you want to be treated, turn the shoe on the other foot for a minute, if you got your would you not want to share it with just about anybody who will listen ( or not)?.. would you not want to scream at the top of your lungs? would it really matter if you got your BFP the first time or the 100th time, i hope and pray everyone does get their BFP, and i hope and pray that those of us TTC will support those who did get them, and then, in turn, they would be happy for you..\

i guess what i am saying is that the TTC journey is a long hard road, filled with alot of emotions/feelings/ and what not, everyone is entitled to their own feelings, however, this is suppose to be a place to come and talk/yell/cry/mourn/ ect.. without judgement.

my story is a long and emotional one.. DH and I have been TTC (AND NP) for over 10 yrs, we have been on and off again.. my Cousin, whom does not have any kids, whom also adopted 3 of her sisters kids ( long storY), went thru HELL and back (tests, IVF's you name it) and just this past month she announced her pregnancy to her family.. i for one am beaming with joy, because she deserves to have a child ( just like all of us), and i will be happy for her and be there for her when she needs someone.


OK getting off my soap box now...

 

[Mellybelle]

I wasnt going to post here, but now I feel I have to.

Yes, getting a BFP is wonderful and we are always happy for the person who got one. And there is nothing worse than sour grapes, especially for the person who is stuck with a whole bunch of them.

Personally, I dont find it very encouraging that someone else got their BFP after only one cycle of trying. I find it yet another reminder that my body wont do what its supposed to do and everyone elses does.

There is a section of the forum for BFP announcements. When I want encouragement I'll go and read the announcements there.

 

[TaeBoMama]

I've been trying for a couple of years to conceive, and to be honest, it pisses me off to see other TTC'ers unhappy to hear of someone else getting pregnant. I LOVE to hear the news of a pregnancy! I guess we're all here to support those who are trying--but once you get what you're trying for, we don't want to hear about it??? How dumb is that?

 

[TaeBoMama]

Personally, I don't want to keep coming to a board where all I read about is women TRYING to conceive. I want to see that many have achieved their goal. That should give you HOPE that it can happen to YOU. Instead, many let JEALOUSY take over. So it happened the FIRST month for this women...guess if it was a couple of years of trying it would make you feel better? If I get pregnant would you not be happy for me? Probably not. I would be happy for you.

 

[Mellybelle]

I do like to hear BFP announcements. In the correct section of the forum. There are days when I dont want to be reminded of what I no longer have.

 

[Indigo77]

Am I missing something? Who was not happy for the OP? Where are the sour grapes?

The only thing I wish to point out is that there is a certain etiquette here that is usually sensed by most over time.