I'm new and would love to join here!

[BlueHadeda]

I've been in the WTT groups for a month or so since joining BnB, but I've stalked this forum, because I'm 37 years old. We were only supposed to start TTC'ing around September, but out of the blue my dh told me yesterday that if I'm ready and sure about this, we can start!!! I'm so excited. Mostly because my dh is on board now. He wasn't, because he's happy with the 3 children we have, and has no burning desire to add to our family like I do. I feel like there's just one child still missing. I just want the whole experience one last time. I absolutely adore having babies. But pregnancy is very very hard on me, so I know this will be our absolute last baby.

I'm excited to get to know all of you and share our journeys. I'm not sure how long it'll take me, since I'm now on the wrong side of 35. I got pregnant with my last baby when I was 33. My age now brings with it lots of worries, especially as we already have a special needs child. Well, actually 2. My eldest son has epilepsy, and my daughter has a mild neural tube defect (a tethered cord). It's like the baby brother of Spina Bifida. So my husband is quite scared that we'll have another special needs child.

 

[NorthStar]

Welcome to the 35+ forum, be warned we go off topic a LOT here though LOL

 

[dachsundmom]

Welcome and I hope your stay is a short one!

 

[LillyLove]

Welcome! You are not on the wrong side of 35, you are right where you need to be!

 

[Sus09]

Welcome to the forum

 

[cebethel]

Welcome blue!

 

[37Hopeful]

Hello & Welcome! I joined about a week ago & it has been a great experience thus far. There are some very educated and supportive women on this forum. You will learn a lot, you'll laugh...you'll cry. Most importantly, as LilyLove stated above, YOU ARE RIGHT WHERE YOU NEED TO BE!
Welcome!

 

[Indigo77]

:wave: hello, welcome and GL!

 

[Macwooly]

Hello and welcome

I hope your stay in TTC isn't too long and your BFP comes along soon

 

[Desperado167]

Hi and welcome ,the ladies here are amazing ,Gl,xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[readyformore]

Welcome and good luck.

I'm also ttc #4.

 

[BlueHadeda]

Thank you everyone, I appreciate all the warm welcome wishes!

Readyformore, how old is your other three? I'm getting so much comments from family and friends when I just mention a 4th, that I decided not to tell most of them that we're TTC.

 

[cebethel]

I'm getting so much comments from family and friends when I just mention a 4th, that I decided not to tell most of them that we're TTC.

This is what I say to those people

But if it were my family, then it would be

 

[crystal443]

Welcome

 

[readyformore]

Thank you everyone, I appreciate all the warm welcome wishes!

Readyformore, how old is your other three? I'm getting so much comments from family and friends when I just mention a 4th, that I decided not to tell most of them that we're TTC.

My kids are 8, 6, and 2.
I have had mixed reactions from the few people I've told. Most that don't know me, think I'm crazy for wanting 4 kids (and honestly, ttc with a 2 year old toddler? I surely am crazy! As sad as it is that I've been ttc so long, I cannot imagine if I had a 4 month old right now. I don't know how I would manage-even though I've done a 23 month gap before. She's just a different breed, lol).

I didn't really start talking about it much until I got into double digits of failed cycles (now cycle #13 and counting). I need the support now more than ever, so sometimes I mention it. Although, that has backfired as well. All of the people I know that want a large family, didn't have trouble conceiving. And most people don't want such a large family to begin with.

Are you hoping to go for more, or see how parenting a 4th is before you make a decision? Or are you DONE? Everyone talks about being DONE. . . I wonder what that feels like, lol!

 

[Mellybelle]

Everyone talks about being DONE. . . I wonder what that feels like, lol!

I often wonder this as well.

 

[BlueHadeda]

Cebethel... That was funny! Can only imagine my family's faces if I give them that reaction.

MellyBelle, Readyformore...me too! I'd love to know how it feels to say I'm DONE. I always wanted 5 kids at least. But yes, I think sadly, this time we will be done. I agreed to a sterilisation with my next c-section (had c-sects with all 3 kids, unfortunately). My hubby only ever wanted 2 kids, so he agreed to a 3rd because he knew I wanted more. But he never ever thought he'd agree to a 4th! He's terrified, LOL. Poor man. His mom is one of the most outspoken against us having more kids. She just cannot understand it. She only had her 3rd because she wanted a girl and had 2 boys already. When the 3rd was a boy as well, that was it for her. She never wanted more kids. And cannot understand why I would want another, when I already have one of each gender. As if that's the reason why people have more children!!! So you can see how he (my hubby), being raised by her, do not think a large family is a wonderful thing. He loves all his 3 kids to bits, but the 4th will really be it, for him. No more. Financially it's the best decision as well for us and those kids we already have.

Readyformore, I hope you'll get that bfp SOON! It must be so heartbreaking to wait 13 cycles. Even though I agree with you, having 2 babies 2 years from each other is HECTIC! My first two differed 31 months and it wasn't easy. My 3rd came when my 2nd was past 4 years, and that was soooo easy, compared to the first 2.

 

[Mrs_Nesbit]

Not telling anyone else we are TTC. My youngest is 2 and a half - people will probably think we are bonkers.
Desperate to give the little sweetheart a sibling near his age though - his older brother and sister are 17 & 14, his step brother and sister are 21 & 16..meh..

 

[readyformore]

Cebethel... That was funny! Can only imagine my family's faces if I give them that reaction.

MellyBelle, Readyformore...me too! I'd love to know how it feels to say I'm DONE. I always wanted 5 kids at least. But yes, I think sadly, this time we will be done. I agreed to a sterilisation with my next c-section (had c-sects with all 3 kids, unfortunately). My hubby only ever wanted 2 kids, so he agreed to a 3rd because he knew I wanted more. But he never ever thought he'd agree to a 4th! He's terrified, LOL. Poor man. His mom is one of the most outspoken against us having more kids. She just cannot understand it. She only had her 3rd because she wanted a girl and had 2 boys already. When the 3rd was a boy as well, that was it for her. She never wanted more kids. And cannot understand why I would want another, when I already have one of each gender. As if that's the reason why people have more children!!! So you can see how he (my hubby), being raised by her, do not think a large family is a wonderful thing. He loves all his 3 kids to bits, but the 4th will really be it, for him. No more. Financially it's the best decision as well for us and those kids we already have.

Readyformore, I hope you'll get that bfp SOON! It must be so heartbreaking to wait 13 cycles. Even though I agree with you, having 2 babies 2 years from each other is HECTIC! My first two differed 31 months and it wasn't easy. My 3rd came when my 2nd was past 4 years, and that was soooo easy, compared to the first 2.

That sounds JUST like my DH as well.
He was on board for the first 2. I pushed him into the 3rd. Really, he's only going for the 4th to make me happy. He'd be fine if I told him to get a vasectomy. I had to literally beg and bully him for about a year and a half before he reluctantly agreed to ttc again, lol.
I'd also like 5. I have no idea why that number, but it's very appealing to me. It'll never happen though. After this experience of ttc, he won't ever allow it again.
At least I have 3, right?

 

[BlueHadeda]

Mrs_Nesbit, I totally get it that you want to give your youngest a sibling close to his age. I too would've loved that. Unfortunately my daughter had a very bad year, so there was no way my husband would've agreed to TTC until her issues was sorted out (which it now mostly is). And now my youngest would be past age 4 when we have another. Pity.

Readyformore, I'm so relieved to hear your story! Sounds so much like mine. I felt so bad about having to "bully" my husband into this. I really tried to hide my feelings, because I knew he really didn't want another. But then one day I couldn't stop the tears and he got the full impact of my longing. Poor man. He stood no chance after that, LOL. I love him to bits for what he's doing for me.

Don't despair yet, one day we will all get our #4's. But yes, in the meantime at least we do have 3 (Mrs_Nesbit, 5 for you with the step children!). I really am grateful for the kids I have. I realise there's so many women that would be over the moon to have even just that one baby. And my heart goes out to them all. Because I know how it feels to long for children.