Is a c-section giving "birth"?

[Ozzieshunni]

I think I'm a bit baffled that people feel this way about how they have given birth after so long. Sure, at the time, I maybe felt cheated, but I don't now because I have a healthy, happy child. I suppose I'm just not that emotionally attached to my birth experience.

I have to agree, Rhys is 2 now it really doesn't bother me how he came into the world all I know is that I made him

Also, just to add, I don't really want to dwell on things that were out of my control.

This is a great attitude, think I'm gonna try it out!

Thanks! It's hard, I'll admit, but to be honest? If I had pushed my birth choice, Alex might not be here. I had no choice really. That's what I think.

 

[Lettuce]

I think tho some of feel that its been our fault tho. I certainly do! If I hadn't done this, if I hadn't done that...
People always said I was born to be a mother but the pnd that followed and the despair that everyone in the world could see how fantastic and beautiful my daughter was, except me was hard. yes, I KNOW having a c section is giving birth, and I voted yes, but I don't FEEL I gave birth. I don't blame the hospital, they saved my life, but I blame myself.
I aim to have the mentality that it doesn't matter how she got her, but actually, it does to me, 14months on. My overhang was stitched wrong and there's a huge lopsided difference, I still have pain and I still feel the need to relive it.
I hope I can come to acceptance one day.

 

[Ozzieshunni]

I wouldn't blame myself for something I really had no control over. It's like the antibodies that attacked Alex's heart. I blamed myself for a long time about them because it was my body, but then I realized, how can I blame myself for something I didn't know about?

 

[Lettuce]

I know Ozzie, and you are right, but I still have to reach a level where I can say I had no control over it, if you get me?

 

[lily24]

I think there is every need to be insulted! People are saying that I didn't give birth to one of my sons!!!

Pretty sure I gave birth to both of them! They came from my body! I carried them for over 40 weeks! I was in labour with both of them! I pushed with both of them!

My son just didn't magically appear one night! He has a BIRTHday!

People tell me I failed, I cheated, I don't have the right to say I gave birth!

Thank goodness someone us speaking my language! I was also told at the start of this threat i did not have the right to feel insulted by people voting ''No''

You know, you think women would stop being so critical of others when it comes to being a parent, and just stick thogether.
You get stick for bottle feeding, your less of a woman (basically what most people say or want to say/think) if you HAD or CHOSE to have a c-section, when will it end?!

This thread really isnt doing anything for some peoples feelings

 

[patch2006uk]

I'm not upset about the c-section anymore, but being pregnant again and making the vbac vs repeat cs decisions, and the risks involved, the recovery, everything - I have been thinking more about the birth I had last time and what's going to be next time. It's hard not to think about the c-section when you can feel the scar pulling from the inside sometimes.

 

[Raggydoll]

I think it's harder to hear "you've not given birth" from someone who has never experienced a c-section. I refer again to the noun definition of birth;

The emergence of a baby or other young from the body of its mother; the start of life as a physically separate being.

I can understand people who have had a section saying no, after my section I felt shocked at not being pregnant anymore. You do not experience the surge of hormones a woman has with a vaginal birth.

Ideally, I wanted a natural birth and if I have another I am very much aiming for a VBAC. However I am at a point where I feel my section was a birth. This does not mean this is how other mothers may feel about their sections.

 

[Eternal]

I had a natural for my first and my twins were a section (due to both being breach), I dont feel the same about my birthng experience with the twins as I did with my eldest. When they said "well done" after the twins were born, i thought, " for what?"

I didnt labour with my twins, although i had been contracting for weeks, so it was not the same, i dont know what i would call it, i wouldnt define it or not define it.

As a mum, i feel as much a mum to the twins as i do to my eldest.

when people ask me about teh difference, i say, with my eldest i felt empowered and amazed that i had pushed my baby out. it was amazing. With the twins i didnt feel that, but with all of them i looked at them and thought, wow, i made them.

 

[JASMAK]

I just think whether you 'feel' like you have given birth or not, isn't really up for debate...it is whether you did or not, physically...and unless the stork dropped one off, you adopted, had a surrogate...YOU GAVE BIRTH. You may not 'feel' that way, but you still DID. I was unconcious for one of my sections....you can't get anymore disconnected from the event...but, yes, I bloody well gave birth....I have the scar, I had her and felt her in my tummy, and she suckeled from my breast for 19mths afterwards. No one on this planet...whether they sectioned or not is going to tell me I didn't birth her! She is not a WalMart special...I nourished her from Day ONE....from my placenta, and she came from my body with love.

 

[pinklightbulb]

I will vote no.

And I've had two c-sections and never had a vaginal birth.

I don't feel I gave birth. They were taken out of me. I did nothing to make that happen. So in my own opinion, no, I haven't physically given birth to a child.

 

[KittyVentura]

Absolutely.

 

[minties]

Hell yes, it's giving birth.

I was born by c-section, I have a birthday. Do I not deserve one as I wasn't birthed vaginally? How could you have a birthday if no-one gave birth to you?

Same with my son (EMCS). Shall I instead have a cut-outta-me day for him?

He was born from my body, he was birthed. It wasn't the birth I wanted and it took me a long time to come to grips with it.

 

[Tasha]

I am sort of unsure, I didnt feel like it when I had my emergency section but I would never say it isnt because like others have said what is it then? And also who am I to project my feelings on someone else? It did feel different to my four vaginal births, but then all of my deliveries felt different. Dont get me wrong, I am not hung up on her birth, I am incredibly grateful that she is here given that her sisters have died either side of her and the fact that her placenta was very much like theirs, plus different doesnt mean it didnt hurt, it doesnt make me any less proud of the section than my vaginal births.

Oh and as a side, to those that said giving life is giving birth; I disagree for the fact that I laboured my little girls, I gave birth to Honey and felt all 5lb 11 of her, I have a breech birth with Riley Rae, she was my second longest labour but her twelve ounces just slipped out. I never gave them life outside my womb but I certainly gave birth to them.

 

[vaniilla]

I think it's easy for it to be confusing, the words itself don't really lend much help! I prefer to call it laboring because it makes more sense - your body experiences labour regardless of how the baby gets out.

As humans we adapt to do what's best for us given circumstances, it's being responsible and realistic, having to undergo major surgery should never be considered 'easy' or not a 'real' birth because when you look at it physically and emotionally it can be a lot more draining then a vaginal birth. Lo was a ventouse birth as his head got stuck and I couldn't push him out by myself, if it had failed a second time it would have turned into a EMCS because the cord was around his neck, I don't see how it would have been any different.

 

[patch2006uk]

I think it's easy for it to be confusing, the words itself don't really lend much help! I prefer to call it laboring because it makes more sense - your body experiences labour regardless of how the baby gets out.

As humans we adapt to do what's best for us given circumstances, it's being responsible and realistic, having to undergo major surgery should never be considered 'easy' or not a 'real' birth because when you look at it physically and emotionally it can be a lot more draining then a vaginal birth. Lo was a ventouse birth as his head got stuck and I couldn't push him out by myself, if it had failed a second time it would have turned into a EMCS because the cord was around his neck, I don't see how it would have been any different.

I never experienced labour Not even 1 proper contraction.

It's not the 'birth' bit I struggle with - clearly Isaac was born, given he's here and he has a birthday! It's the 'give'. I didn't give birth to him IMO. I just lay there while he was born.

 

[meli1981]

your body was laboring for weeks before your baby was born

 

[Andypanda6570]

Of course it is giving birth/I have had 4 vaginal and see no difference. When you bring a life into this world it is called Giving Birth

 

[Baby France]

Geez...this question goes on my list of "is this a serious question?" list! Right up there with someone who once asked me if I ever forgot which twin I was. I think whoever wrote that FB status is either a half-brain, or is passive-agressively trying to hurt someone's feelings.

Agreed ....I'm a twin and was once asked how old I was....then asked how old my twin sister was

My birth story was nowhere near as straight forward or easy as that, and she called him 'extracted not born' ... I wanted to cry. That's why I find it so offensive.. it makes it sound like I didn't go through anything to get him here.

What an absolute idiot.

I watched a program on extreme patenting and one woman said she didn't believe a section mum can possibly have the same bond with her baby. I cried for the whole night after that!

That is disgusting.

I believe that it is giving birth. I know that I personally would have been devastated if I had a c-section and completely empathised with those who feel like that

I also think that some people are taking others feelings and getting offended by the way that they feel after having a c-section.

I also think that the fact a man has written the statement - the orb of all knowledge eh and talking from his own personal experience of when HE gave birth...yeah, remember that day?