is breastfeeding odd in your social circle?

Discussion in 'Breastfeeding' started by jovi_girl, Aug 25, 2009.

  1. jovi_girl

    jovi_girl Well-Known Member

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    Im just wondering if breastfeeding is very common within your family/circle of friends (and therefore how much support you get?)

    My mum breastfed all my siblings and i, and my best friend breastfed her baby for 6 months, so when i was pregnant, i never thought about formula feeding. Breastfeeding was just something ive always known i would do.

    But since ive had the baby, i get quite alot of comments about my breastfeeding from extended family and friends. They are not necessarily all negative, but ive realised that alot of people are surprised and they arent exactly supportive....like ive had "oh, nice to see hes not attached to your boob for once" or "geese Lani, have you got it out again?" and true, they were said in a somewhat joking manner, but i was kind of annoyed and it did make me feel kind of uncomfortable...These comments have never come from my immediate family or close friends (who have all been great about my breastfeeding), but it makes me think, that it must be so hard for those of you who are constantly surrounded by people like that.

    So anyway, i was just wondering, is breastfeeding the norm for you and your friends/family or are u the odd one out?
     
  2. Bec L

    Bec L Proud mum to 2 girls/1boy

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    I'm very lucky as my mum breastfeed us 3 and my sister b/fed all 4 of her children so like you, it just seemed like the norm to me. I also have a big group of antenatal friends and the majority of them breastfeed which has been brilliant for sharing advice/problems etc.

    A couple of my closest schoolfriends have had babies recently and tried b/feeding very briefly before deciding it wasn't for them. We all respect each others choices though and have always been supportive of each other so it hasn't been an issue

    I can understand it must be really hard dealing with negative comments and there are plenty of people on here who have sadly had to deal with less than positive situations. :hugs:
     
  3. mama2b

    mama2b Mummy & TTC

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    Only had one negative comment from a friend who I have seen once since Lucas was born so I don't really class her as a friend.

    All my friends and family are supportive most of my friends that have babies at the moment all bottlefed and they are 100% supportive.

    My OH is great to, he was bf for 9 months and he said he wouldn't want me to stop for a while yet.
     
  4. Mervs Mum

    Mervs Mum Doula & Mum of 3!

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    My Mum and sister didnt BF. My MIL did briefly. I have quite a few friends who BF and a few who FF. Family wise I'm in the minority but friend wise it's a mix.

    I've not had any negative comments from anyone. My mum is the first to tell people I'm still BFing in a good way. She's really proud of me and that means a lot to me. My sister is too and has had negative comments about BF from her work friends and fiercely defends women's rights to choose how they feed their babies. A pregnant work colleague described BFing to her as 'disgusting' and my sister went to town on her, even though she never BF herself. She should have ignored her really....after saying it was disgusting the same idiot went outside for a smoke....brain dead.
     
  5. Kitten

    Kitten Mummy to Theakston & Nyah

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    My mum and aunts etc all breastfed as did MIL so it's the norm in our family. I'm the first of my friends to have a baby but all the friends I've made through mummy groups FF so I'm the odd one out.
     
  6. Rah

    Rah Mummy to 2 princesses

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    My mum BF me and my sister, Hubbys mum FF all her 5 and all our 8 neices have been FF so on hubbys side it was totally new.
    I had the questions how do you know shes getting enough etc but once explained they are really supportive as is hubby, his sister said something really nice at the start "I could never do it but well done you for doing it and if you need anything i will try to help" which meant a lot
    Everytime i go into work they ask if im still BF'ing and when i say yes they smile and say well done keep going your doing fab etc etc which is nice
     
  7. Hayley83

    Hayley83 Well-Known Member

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    My mum, mum in law, sister in law sister all formula fed i dont know anyone who has breast fed in our family. When michael was born my mum kept trying to get him on formula saying he was hungry all the time, and for some reason its looked upon badly in our family:growlmad: . But i love it and know its best for him so i will keep on going till im ready to stop.
     
  8. asacia

    asacia Guest

    My family are very pro-breastfeeding. My Mum was a breastfeeding councillor who fed us all past 1 year. My Aunt BF her twins.

    My friends are all single blokes who find it a bit odd, but don't make any negative comments, just rude jokes!

    I think everyone knows how pro breastfeeding I am, and don't mention it!

    To be honest, the biggest lack of support I've had is from the medical profession.

    Out of Mummy friends, most FF but tried breastfeeding, so are supportive.
     
  9. CountingDown

    CountingDown Well-Known Member

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    I am the only one in my family to have continued breastfeeding past 1 week. My mother never breastfed any of us and neither did my mil. I have 1 friend who breastfed until her lo was 6 weeks so I am not completely alone!!

    I have faced some negativity but that tended to be when Olivia was younger and most people accept that I am going to continue breastfeeding as long as I can. xxx
     
  10. csmummu

    csmummu Home to Charlie.

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    my mum was forced to BF my brother (40 next year) because he was premature and she also had to express when he was still in hospital so she had a very bad experiance with the whole thing and then didnt bother with the 3 kids after that!

    The weirdest support ive found is from my little brother (23) but when im at my mums Bfing i'll only use a muslin cloth every so oftern as i know my dad is uncomfortable which i understand! but if hes out the room i will open feed (lol) and if my brother comes in he will have a full blown conversation with me LOL i love the fact hes not bothered! hubby has beeeeen super espically in that first week! but my mum has accepted im Bfing and we go to town every saturday and shes cool about me feeding anywhere.

    With my DD 4 years ago family came to visit and one of my brothers said "argh god max do you have to?" errr well either that or she doesnt get fed :doh:

    So yeah im half out there on my own but have some support :) the best thing is living in blackpool we get a lot of stag and hen do's so the locals see a lot worse than me Bfing lol
     
  11. asacia

    asacia Guest

    I still find it odd when people don't mind. The oddest one is my Dad, he will sit and chat to me while I feed. He also used to sit in the same room while I was pumping! He did once say, while helping me clean my pump, that he thought he was through with this whole thing, but he said it in a jokey way.

    When people are round, or I'm visiting, I always make a point of saying 'Oh, I best feed him!' so that people have a chance to either make their excuses and leave, or offer me somewhere private if they aren't comfortable.

    I always feed in private at In-Laws though. I know MIL and SIL both tried to breastfeed and couldn't, so I don't want to 'rub it in their face' that I can. When I couldn't breastfeed, the site of another woman doing it made me really sad.
     
  12. charlieann

    charlieann Well-Known Member

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    none of my family or the inlaws bf. most have tried to put me off and tell me to switch to formula. their reasons for this is 1. i wasnt producing enough milk (all in their heads im producing plenty) 2. i dont know how much he's getting and 3. they couldnt babysit him. i always phone the critics after he's been weighed to let them know how good he's doing on boobies, after couple of weeks of this the comments soon stopped (except from mil who still wants to take him for the day).
    the only support ive had is from siblings (except 17yr old one who is even embarrased to be called uncle- so we call him aunty!) my big bro even told me when drunk that he thinks its great what im doing.
    all my friends have been positive and very curious (most dont have kids yet)
     
  13. Lu28

    Lu28 Aisling's mammy

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    I'm definitely in the minority in my family and it's a mixture with friends. Even with my friends, I'm very much in the minority for having carried on as long as we have, I think they finished at about 2 months.

    I've had a few comments from friends and family along the lines of "god do you have your norks out again?" and I honestly think it's them trying to act as though it's totally natural and that they're not fazed by it but not doing a very good job! :lol: I certainly don't think they mean anything bad by it although it can be a bit annoying. My BIL made the mistake of mooing at me in the early days when I was pumping in the next room - he never did it again!
     
  14. DizzyMoo

    DizzyMoo Guest

    I'm the only one out of family & friends who breastfed, So it was a shock when i said i was going to breastfeed my son ( nearly 4 now ) . I didn't exactly get bad comments, more shock than anything. I got a few who were like " oh god you wouldn't catch me doing that " but nobody directly said anything nasty from what i remember, When i was at families houses if i needed to feed i left the room & went into one of their bedrooms, where it was quiet & easier to feed & i didn't feel embarrassed. I haven't decided how to feed with bump yet but more than likely breastfeed again .
     
  15. Lara+sam+bump

    Lara+sam+bump Well-Known Member

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    Well my Mum combine fed until I was 6 months and then I was FF, My Nan BF 2 of hers and FF the other 2. My Auntie BF all 3 of hers, her 1st until he was 3 yrs old, 2nd till he was 18 months and 3rd till he was 6 months, then had to go back to work sadly :(. None of my old friends hav babies yet and they find BF werid and all say they wont do it. My OH wouldn't latch on so was FF, but MIL BF her other 2 children. Out of my new Mummy friends, only one is BFing and is now moving over to combine feeding. All the others FF. So I guess im in a minority, but I still get lots of surport from my family and they all encourage me to continue, even OH who orginally didnt like that I was BFing is starting to come round to the idea, I think cos Noah feeds less now, before I think he felt a little redundant and left out of it all as Noah just wanted boob all the time. xxx
     
  16. ellismum

    ellismum Ellis' mum!!

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    Mum BF me and my 2 sisters and my sister BF her 2 LO for a few weeks after they were born but switched to formula. My OH mum FF her 2. All my family have been supportive and my OH asked me to BF Ellis for as long as possible! Friend wise, I have one close friend who has a kid and she was born premature and tube fed pumped milk whilst she was ill but wouldn't latch so she had to FF. She has said that when she has another she is defo going to try again after seeing me do it!! Of other mums I have see I would say it's a 50/50 split.
     
  17. Hevz

    Hevz 4 beautiful children

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    No experience before and never witnessed it (to my knowledge) yet I always, always knew that's how I wanted to feed my babies. Tis strange, especially as I "hate" my breasts being touched etc and I wondered if I'd manage to feed but I have....4 times now:thumbup:


    None of my Aunts did it, my Mum never, MIL never and nobody on hubby's side did either and to be honest....my family (and his) are pretty anti-breastfeeding and I've had quite a few snidey remarks over the years. The always hint at me stopping too

    "awww....I think you should put baby on a bottle now and give yourself a rest":saywhat: WTF has it got to do with you? I'm fine ta:growlmad:


    My MIL once said she found the whole idea perverse:grr:....her sister is a midwife and lactation specialist actually but she lives in Hobart, Oz:dohh:
     
  18. Samantha675

    Samantha675 Maybe baby #3?!?

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    My mother tried, but only made it to 6 weeks, my MIL made it to 9 months. I have on friend who just weaned her 15 month old a few weeks ago, aside from that all my girlfriends are still nursing.
     
  19. beancounter

    beancounter Well-Known Member

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    my family are not strong on BF, but they are very supportive, all bar my brother, who thinks its obscene, but hes a nobber. plus he's never been there when I have BF because otherwise he would know there were no nips on view and it isnt obscene :rofl: that's just young lads for you. I have some friends who have no kids and I know they are not pro BF because before I was PG they had this rant about someone BFing in a restaurant. I think I told my views then so they have never dared joke about me feeding Finn. OH's family are all breastfed/pro BFing. most my mum type pals are BFing or tried hard to, so all good there :D
     
  20. jms895

    jms895 Well-Known Member

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    2 of my close friends did and the others didnt, my best friend is a MW and will BF when she has a baby too :D
     

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