IVF Predjudice

[Aphrodite]

I just cannot believe anyone would have such opinions on IVF. Someone at CHURCH of all places. In my church the men and women have separate lessons as well as together and during the men's one my DH told me one of the men (who is a bit strange by all accounts) went on this massive rant about IVF saying 'who do these women think they are playing God, if they can't have children they should adopt, its disgusting' etc etc. Its hard to know how old this guy is but I would guess 50 ish and he's disabled. He does things like burp really loudly during church and snores during lessons so I don't know how he is cognitively but when DH told me this I was absolutely LIVID. No one at my church knows we have had IVF but I feel like telling him and giving him a piece of my mind. My best friend had IVF too so its obv close to my heart. This guy is unmarried and has no kids. I just feel so angry that people can be so narrow minded and judgemental. Luckily, all the men there kind of jumped on him and basically told him his opinions were not tolerable, and he should keep his views to himself.

Has anyone else come across this sort of attitude?

 

[sarahincanada]

Try to ignore him, he is ignorant and I wouldnt give him the time of day! the world is full of people with differing opinions, all that matters is what you and your partner believe in

 

[SabrinaKat]

Yes and no. Here in Ireland, the Catholic Church was quite strong until recent scandals, etc., and we probably won't have mentioned beyond our close family that we were considering it; we went through all the preliminary interviews, blood work, scans, etc., and were a month away from starting my first cycle. I got pregnant naturally, but I think my problem was hormonal and once fixed (underactive thyroid), finally got pregnant (had an m/c 2 years ago). Most people in their 20s and 30s and 40s are usually more understanding and I think the guy is just an arrogant, ignorant PIG; and I think whatever helps you conceive, then good! Most people were very kind, sympathetic and most, were glad that science could help us!

best wishes

p.s. We were considering egg donation and we couldn't have told anyone here in Ireland as I would not be considered the mother on the birth certificate!

 

[yellowbell]

Hi there!
I haven't really experienced somebody with that attitude (thankfully!) I'm Catholic and although I know the Catholic church's stand on IVF, I do not agree with it. I do not think it is playing God at all because if it were it would have a guaranteed 100% success. I rather think that it is actually a gift from God to give couples who are infertile to conceive and experience the gift of life.
yeah, just ignore judgemental people like that man. It was nice that some of the other men made him shut up.

Wish I could be IVF first time lucky like you!

 

[Aphrodite]

Yellowbell I am praying for you x x x

 

[readyformore]

p.s. We were considering egg donation and we couldn't have told anyone here in Ireland as I would not be considered the mother on the birth certificate!

GET THE F@CK OUT OF HERE!!

Are you serious?

You could carry a baby, deliver it from your body, and not be considered it's mother?

Tell that to my friend that had a baby from an egg donor. She carried him for 9 months, had a c-section, and breastfed him for 16 months! Try telling her she is not his mother.

OMG, that is insane!

 

[kleinfor3]

wow...all i can say is wow...i think we need to pray for him and people that are that are like him, and the Ireland government! **Dear Lord, please be with all of the closed minded people who simply do not understand the trials of infertility. Please help them understand that it is a sickness that most people will agree is treatable. Please continue to be with all of us on our journey of conception. Comfort us and feel free to remind us of the miracle of your son born of a VIRGIN. AMEN.**

 

[yellowbell]

Yellowbell I am praying for you x x x

Thank you so much!

 

[Betheney]

Hi i've come across this thread by accident. But i hope you all don't mind my intrusion. The comment about not being the mother on the birth certificate reminded me of something here in Australia.

Surrogacy in Australia is very uncommon because it's illegal to get paid and it's just all around not really heard of. But mostly because the laws are kind of messy. Say you and your husband have working eggs and sperms but there is just something wrong with the womans uterus so you get a surrogate. In Australia the surrogate mother is the LEGAL mother she has to give the baby up for adoption for the biological couple to adopt. I think that is really really rough. I can imagine how hard it would be to give up a baby as a surrogate but that is someone elses flesh and blood. Could you imagine having your baby grow inside someone else and then have that someone else run away with it? horrible.

Anyway i heard they were looking at altering a few of the laws, in fact they may have last year. But i mean 2010 or 2011 is pretty damn late to change a law like that. Get with the times Aus.

 

[readyformore]

Surrogacy is also illegal in France. Or at least getting paid for it is illegal.

Wow, I thought the US was messed up. The more I hear, the more I want to stay here, lol.