Juggling baby and housework

[ickle pand]

My son is nearly 11 weeks old and I really thought that by now I'd have a bit of a routine with the housework so that I maybe did a room a day. So not everything was done at once but it was still getting done. Well things haven't turned out like that at all. Most of the housework, the little that does get done, is done by my DH. I want to do more, because he has a stressful job and he really doesn't have enough time/energy to get everything done. The kitchen and bathroom floors haven't been washed or ever hoovered properly since our son was born and it's getting me down living with things in such a state. DH also does most of the food shopping and cooking

We manage washing clothes and dishes, but we're only hoovering about once every 2 weeks and the same with cleaning the bathroom. I know we're never going to have an immaculate house now that we have a child but it's getting beyond that. My friend from antenatal class has 2 under 2 and has a cleaner house than me.

I was lent a baby sling and I had great ideas that I could put him in it and get stuff done, but he screams every time I try him in it and the other type of carrier that another friend lent me. He doesn't like being put down at the moment either. He's fussy and cluster feeds in the evenings, so I can't just give him to DH so I can get stuff done. I went for a shower tonight (my first in 2 days) and when I came out 10 mins later DS was already crying.

When I was pregnant everyone told me to accept any help that was offered and I fully intended to, but no one has so much as offered to make a cup if tea while they've visited. They all just want to hold DS. One friend brought lunch when she visited, with her two children but then I had the mess to clean up when they'd gone.

How does everyone else do it?

 

[sue_88]

My DD goes to bed at 7pm so afterwards I put on a wash load, tidy lounge, do the washing up after my dinner.

I Hoover round her during the day, she's not too fond of the Hoover, but tough. I also clean bunny cage and toilets when she's napping.

I usually do the two small bathroom floors with a wet wipe after a pee, but hardly ever mop kitchen floor, tend to just vacuum it. Takes me about 7mins to quickly whip round whole house with vacuum so I'm happy to leave Millie to get the job done if she's a bit whingy as it's not long.

 

[Equreuil]

Everyone wants to hold the baby? Ask if they mind you doing some cleaning up while they do. Ten to one, they'll understand. And visiting while you clean makes the task go by faster.

For me it got a bit easier when my son started sleeping through the night. It's sometimes hard to motivate myself, but once he's down for the count, I have time to play catch up on housework.

 

[Nevaie]

I lower my expectations and set cleaning priorities. There is a certain level of cleanliness that I feel I must maintain (and this level will be dif for everyone) but anything beyond that is a bonus. Higher priority things (garbage out of the house, diapers washed, clothes washed ect.) are what I work on first. Then when that's done I work on my 2nd priorities like vacuuming, clearing the counters, putting away clutter and on down the list. I usually get to about 3rd priority and rarely 4th. I also just focus on trying to avoid messes as much as I'm able. No shoes in the house, clean up while cooking, take care of dishes right after eating, quick wipe down of the shower walls after a shower ect. Floor scrubbing doesn't get done very often. The walls haven't been wiped down for a while. The ceiling fan blades are probably caked in dust. The bathroom is acceptable but not squeaky clean. I have no idea what's under my couch. But the laundry is mostly done, clutter is cleared, surfaces are clean and baby is happy. Life goes on.

Edit: Oh and I've given up on expecting to set her down to clean. Sometimes I can, but I never expect it. I set my cleaning schedule around how long I can keep her entertained doing X. For instance I can put her in the bouncer while I do something I don't have to move around much for like dishes, folding laundry or sorting things. She'll sometimes play on her activity gym for 10-15 minutes so I know that gives me enough time to vacuum or do laundry. She's recently gotten into her jumperoo so I might get 20 minutes out of that to declutter and clean the counters and appliances. Her swing might buy me enough time to clean part of the bathroom and wash up after. I work in short spurts and sometimes she doesn't want to play so either the cleaning waits and I try again in 15 minutes, or if it's important (like diapers or clothes that HAVE to be done asap) she waits for 10 minutes while I do it.

 

[ttc126]

I know just how you feel! It gets better soon i promise. Now my son is finally having predictable naps and I'm able to do so much more! You're almost to the easier stage!

I do one room per day and it works out ok. I try to do one load of laundry per day too. Some days I'm lucky to get the bed made but it's getting better!

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

I lucky that DD has a longer nap from about 15:30 to 17:00, so I rush round and do it all then. DH takes over DD whilst I serve dinner then do the kitchen after. If I got visitors during the day they'd think we were slobs! It's spotless after 3pm

 

[Sarahdisco]

I try to get the house looking reasonable for when DH gets in (bottles in the sink but dishes done, general mess tidied). Hoovering gets done once a week when LO goes to nannas for the day. Laundry etc I do during the day. LO is starting to roll so I put a duvet on the floor and set her down and that takes her attention for a good hour so I can get a few bits done. I know she's safe there añd I can keep a listen out.

Ironing hasn't been done in weeks though! Today I'm off to buy a sweeper so I can whizz round the floors without getting the big Hoover out.

I've given up on trying to fit cleaning in when LO naps, I just try to keep her entertained long enough to do each little job. Aim for one room per day cleaned and the rest of the house squared away.

 

[Athena]

It wasn't until Rose was about 5 months and napping at predictable times that I got back in the swing of things with HW. When she naps in the am I do the kitchen, I vacuum while she's playing in the floor. And like sue do a quick evening tidy round when she's in bed and put some washing on. Except my machine is broken at the mo at my washing mountain is getting bigger by the day aaaagggghhhh

 

[BellaBoo0512]

It was really difficult for me to get things done at first. OH doesn't have a clue when it comes to housework so everything is left to me. All I can suggest is that you do a bit at a time when your baby is sleeping. With regards to the food shop.. I do mine online and get it delivered and it's so much easier than going to the supermarket.

Hang in there, it does get easier

 

[JessyG]

its only now at 4 months that i can get much done i tend to sweep downstairs, clean bathrooms and tidy bedrooms while she naps. i always do the kitchen when i am washing bottles/steralising and tend to put a load of washing on while Bella is kicking about on her mat. i try to do most stuff first thing as i usually go for a walk over lunch so nothing gets done after noon. when Bella has her last nap at 3:30-4ish i relax and watch tv or eat. she goes to bed at 7 but i dont do anything after that as i am usually exhausted and go to bed with her!

 

[Louppey]

I'll break it down by room as that may be easier, I do this when my toddler is watching TV/playing AND when my baby is napping or happy on her playmat. This is normally maybe 2 windows of 30-40 mins a day.

Kitchen: Tidy dirty dishes into one area so DH can load the dishwasher. Wash bottles, sterilise, make them up. Tidy away any crap on the work surfaces. Wipe down all work surfaces.

Washing: Chuck a load in the washer, if I get time put this out to the tumble & get another load in the washer. Now this is rare, I have been known to wash the same load twice or even three times if me/DH keep forgetting to take it out. Soon as it's out the dryer I fold it all and as I'm folding put it in piles relevant to where it's going to be put. Ie DD1 long sleeve tops, pjs, skirts etc. Then it's put in a large clear box in these piles so I can filter in to their draws quickly & easily.

Living Room: Tidy away crap, chuck out rubbish. After DD1 goes to bed I hand DD2 over to DH and quickly chuck all the toys away. Clear all surfaces of clutter, fold up baby blankets etc.

Dining Room: Bugger all, it's a hole atm

Downstairs WC: Once every 3-4 days I grab a wet cloth and some window cleaner and clean all the surfaces, the toilet itself and the sink, taps, tiles. It takes 2 mins tops. I chuck bleach down the loo when I remember & normally I'll try & time it for when we're out for the day so it can be left.

Bathroom: As downstairs WC, every 3-4 days I wipe everything down with a damp cloth & window cleaner spray. Bleach is exactly the same. I try to wipe down the shower when I'm in there, maybe every other time? Possibly less. When DD1 is in the bath I tidy all the bits on the floor away neatly (baby bath, toys etc).

Girls Bedrooms: I put away their washing etc whenever I get time & chuck anything away that needs to be done. This probably happens every 7-10 days.

Everything else is as and when really. I don't dust unless I'm having a "proper" clean. That probably happens every other month :blushes: where I get someone to babysit the girls for a few hours and I just go crazy cleaning

DH is in charge of hoovering, mopping, changing the bed linen etc and he does this as and when he remembers/can fit it in.

 

[missusgee]

My son is nearly 11 weeks old and I really thought that by now I'd have a bit of a routine with the housework so that I maybe did a room a day. So not everything was done at once but it was still getting done. Well things haven't turned out like that at all. Most of the housework, the little that does get done, is done by my DH. I want to do more, because he has a stressful job and he really doesn't have enough time/energy to get everything done. The kitchen and bathroom floors haven't been washed or ever hoovered properly since our son was born and it's getting me down living with things in such a state. DH also does most of the food shopping and cooking

We manage washing clothes and dishes, but we're only hoovering about once every 2 weeks and the same with cleaning the bathroom. I know we're never going to have an immaculate house now that we have a child but it's getting beyond that. My friend from antenatal class has 2 under 2 and has a cleaner house than me.

I was lent a baby sling and I had great ideas that I could put him in it and get stuff done, but he screams every time I try him in it and the other type of carrier that another friend lent me. He doesn't like being put down at the moment either. He's fussy and cluster feeds in the evenings, so I can't just give him to DH so I can get stuff done. I went for a shower tonight (my first in 2 days) and when I came out 10 mins later DS was already crying.

When I was pregnant everyone told me to accept any help that was offered and I fully intended to, but no one has so much as offered to make a cup if tea while they've visited. They all just want to hold DS. One friend brought lunch when she visited, with her two children but then I had the mess to clean up when they'd gone.

How does everyone else do it?

Oh my God I could've written this! I can tell DH thinks I've been doing nothing all day when he gets home from work. I ended up hoovering about 10.30 lastnight and that's only because my health visitor was coming around first thing this morning.

As soon as I make any attempt to do something...or dare eat, he wakes up and cries.

Ditto, everyone offered help and where are they now!? I asked my MIL to babysit tonight as its my works Xmas party but she had some excuse and my DH has to finish work early.

I have no family local and all I want is someone to take him for an hour so I can shower.

Oh and whoever said 'sleep when baby sleeps' blatantly hasn't had kids or has just forgotten!

 

[ickle pand]

Thank you for all the replies.

I'm realising that I'm not letting him amuse himself enough and not taking his bouncy chair/play mat so today instead of trying to butter toast while holding him, I took his chair through to the kitchen and I put away dishes from the drainer etc while I waited for it to pop. I also stripped our bed while he lay on the mattress kicking his little legs. I just need to get creative

He's just fallen asleep so I'm going to try and clean the bathroom since that's one room DH neglects. If I at least have all my cleaning stuff in there, then I can do a wee bit everytime nature calls lol!

 

[MumToEva]

Hey Hun. I'm one of those 2 under 2 mummies who manages to get the housework done around my 2, but that's because I have had 2 years to get a routine going and get in the swing of things. When my daughter was your LOs age I struggled with housework too. What I tend to do is try to get little bits done as I go along where possible rather than letting itall build up, like taking 5 minutes to empty the dishwasher while my daughter has her breakfast so that the dishes can then be bunged in out of sight during the day rather than piling up. When I get a few minutes free, I make myself a cup of tea, have a break for 10 minutes and if i have the time before i'm needed again, i rush around like a maniac cleaning - that way I feel like i got a little break as otherwise it feels like a very long day. I've also become a pro at speed cleaning - I can give the bathroom a proper clean in a lot less time than it used to take because I keep all the products that I need in a caddy so they are all handy when I get a minute, plus I do things in the same order each times others is no faffing around. I'd also suggest persevering with the wrap/carrier, as some kids take a little while toget used to them - maybe go for a walk either inside or outside the house with LO in it so the movement helps soothe them, or sing to them in it. And I found my swing really useful too - DS wouldn't have stood to be left alone in it, but i could get away with sitting beside him and soothing him, but have my hands free to play with my daughter. Also DH and I have a good routine in the evening going in which one minds the kids and the other scoots around tidying up the days mess, doing the dishes, etc - like your OH he wasn't like that at the start, and he too used to wonder how I got so little done during the day, but leaving him alone with the kids a few times has cured that. And some days I just have to accept that the house is a tip because we have had a hard day - I'd be shamed if anybody arrived unannounced some days, but a t the end of the day it's not the end of the world. Some days just having the kids dressed, fed and clean is enough for one day!

 

[ickle pand]

My DH is a bit of a pain, in that he'll wait until DS is crying to soothe/distract him and then he'll only want boob to calm down. I wouldn't mind if DH then took over from whatever I was doing! I'll have to get stricter with him though and nudge him into reacting sooner.

 

[tubs]

I struggle with this too. Before DS came along, my home was immaculate. Now....it's not!