June Bundles of Joy - 2016

[Becyboo__x]

Had a chat with Xander's teacher yesterday and they are referring him to the SENCO team (special educational needs coordinator - I think!)*We've got a meeting with the school next Wednesday

I know it's awful but I'm so gutted :'( she said he's working at and above his age range in all 17 assessment areas, but there is some behaviours like being still or shouting out/impulse control etc that she feels he has no control over. This week he's had three instances of poo smearing too (once at school!) Which just isn't normal behaviour for a 4 year old.*

She said he's one of, if not the most articulate child she's ever had in a nursery class and his language skills are outstanding, but she feels there's something there although she didn't say what (maybe add/adhd or similar?) He doesn't respond to praise or criticism at all. He isn't bothered about being told off or losing toys or being on the sad book. Nor is he pleased by rewards or stickers etc. He's either well or badly behaved based entirely on what he feels like and there is no way to sway him from that.*

I just don't know what to do or what we're doing wrong. I feel like we were stupid thinking we should have a second child when we didn't even see all the issues our son was having.

Sorry to hear what your going through

I can't relate entirely my son is 6 now but from a young age has been a bit of a tough child to understand he's always been above where he should be learning wise and at school been given harder work due to him getting bored. But every teacher has noticed something strange/different about his behaviour he can either be lovely or a devil.. which I thought he'd grow out of more but he hasn't.. he doesn't respond like he should to praise I recently have been told and other things like you've mentioned too. I suspected adhd from when he was young but no one has mentioned that to me as of yet.. I still to this day suffer with taking him out though he is like a baby when I nip to a shop or we go somewhere throwing himself on floor/running off etc nothing I do changes it either. He has recently been assessed by a behaviour member in the school to watch him and see if they can pick up on anything but I've not heard back from that yet.

I hope things get better

 

[vaniilla]

Had a chat with Xander's teacher yesterday and they are referring him to the SENCO team (special educational needs coordinator - I think!)*We've got a meeting with the school next Wednesday

I know it's awful but I'm so gutted :'( she said he's working at and above his age range in all 17 assessment areas, but there is some behaviours like being still or shouting out/impulse control etc that she feels he has no control over. This week he's had three instances of poo smearing too (once at school!) Which just isn't normal behaviour for a 4 year old.*

She said he's one of, if not the most articulate child she's ever had in a nursery class and his language skills are outstanding, but she feels there's something there although she didn't say what (maybe add/adhd or similar?) He doesn't respond to praise or criticism at all. He isn't bothered about being told off or losing toys or being on the sad book. Nor is he pleased by rewards or stickers etc. He's either well or badly behaved based entirely on what he feels like and there is no way to sway him from that.*

I just don't know what to do or what we're doing wrong. I feel like we were stupid thinking we should have a second child when we didn't even see all the issues our son was having.

I'm sorry you're going through a tough time things like this are always a big shock to parents and instinct calls on us to blame ourselves but this in no way down to you, you have done nothing wrong, nobody has, all children are different and have different areas where they need support. Hopefully through working with the SENCO team you can find out what is behind some of the behavior and can put something in place which will help him.

 

[Tinky_82]

Sorry to hear about your son Lil Pixie but as others have said you shouldn't think it is in anyway your fault. It's good that he's being assessed and if anything is found there are ways to help him with his behaviour. Sending lots of

 

[ehjmorris]

Im thinking of you and your family xx

Pil pixie, i agree its nothing you have done and kids are different, maybe they might find something that can help

 

[Starlight32]

I'm so upset because they are painting the conference room on our floor at work. I'm so worried about toxins hanging around for weeks.

 

[Lavochain]

Thinking of you Lil_Pixie.

Try not to worry Starlight, people have jobs where they ingest chemicals whilst pregnant, like hairdressers, and they are fine. I understand your worry though as I am the same.

 

[GeralynB]

I'm so upset because they are painting the conference room on our floor at work. I'm so worried about toxins hanging around for weeks.

I just had my basement painted. Don't worry you'll be fine.

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

I wouldn't worry about a bit of paint, i imagine walking around the streets is doing people more damage these days Just a bit of perspective, by which i mean; you'll be fine

 

[Tinky_82]

I'm so upset because they are painting the conference room on our floor at work. I'm so worried about toxins hanging around for weeks.

I called my midwife as they were varnishing areas of the building I work in and the smell was strong - I was told not to worry.

 

[mommyxofxone]

so sorry lil pixie. but you're taking care of him, that's awesome. don't feel guilty please!!!

 

[Squig34]

How could you know Pixie without other kids to compare with? & Xander is clearly very capable & intelligent. I understand why you're upset, but it's not because of anything you have or haven't done or a reflection on you as a parent or reason not to have another baby. Don't blame yourself. Hopefully something positive will come out of this assessment so that if Xander needs help, he gets it.

 

[GeralynB]

I was a special education teacher for 15 years before I had my son. You have done nothing wrong. I have a wonderful poem for anyone who is beginning a journey with a special needs child.

 

[Lil_Pixie]

Thank you so much ladies. A big chunk of me just wants to tell the teachers to leave him alone and yell that there's nothing "wrong" with my child. But I know that's totally silly and honestly I'm grateful he hasn't been labelled as a naughty child and written off. He's not naughty, in a 1-1 setting he's so amazing and kind and beautifully behaved, but when he's around other people it's like he can't calm himself down.

It was just a lot to process I think. Xander's behaviour is so good when he isn't in a group - we didn't even have terrible twos! Part of me hopes something does come up so he can get extra support, his development isn't affected right now but as he gets older he's going to need to concentrate and right now I'm not sure he's able to do that.

Had to pick him up early from school today, think he might have tonsillitis. Poor little munchkin :'( his voice is all warped but it sounds so cute

Baby is beating holy hell out of my bladder 4 more sleeps till scan day!

 

[vaniilla]

I hope he's feeling better soon pixie

I can't wait till tomorrow, time goes quickly for me during fri/weekend, it'll be scan time before I know it! The six nations is starting this weekend, I'm so excited that I've ordered myself some non alcoholic beer

 

[gaiagirl]

Hi ladies. Sorry I haven't been around much, I just don't find I have time to keep up!

Had our scan, I cracked like an egg and found out we are having a GIRL! Yay!

All looked well except one little random unexplained "bright spot" in baby's right chest that they have no clue about. Bright is usually calcification they say but we have to go back for a follow up to check in 6 weeks. Anyone heard of this? Seems relatively common but Google says usually it's associated with heart or bowels and this was just in chest...a bit freaky!

Pixie big hugs, try and think of it as a tool to get extra support to help xander succeed...I can imagine how hard that was to hear though.

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

Pixie- It's great that he is getting the support he needs etc rather than just being dumped in the corner etc. Maybe with the right procedures in place now he will come through it, he is only very young still Not my area of expertise sorry!


gaia- No idea :/ how odd that they couldn't tell you more, it has to be good that they weren't super concerned though CONGRATS on a girl

 

[Rhi_Rhi1]

I hope he's feeling better soon pixie

I can't wait till tomorrow, time goes quickly for me during fri/weekend, it'll be scan time before I know it! The six nations is starting this weekend, I'm so excited that I've ordered myself some non alcoholic beer

Is that rugby ?

 

[vaniilla]

Hi ladies. Sorry I haven't been around much, I just don't find I have time to keep up!

Had our scan, I cracked like an egg and found out we are having a GIRL! Yay!

All looked well except one little random unexplained "bright spot" in baby's right chest that they have no clue about. Bright is usually calcification they say but we have to go back for a follow up to check in 6 weeks. Anyone heard of this? Seems relatively common but Google says usually it's associated with heart or bowels and this was just in chest...a bit freaky!

Pixie big hugs, try and think of it as a tool to get extra support to help xander succeed...I can imagine how hard that was to hear though.

Congratulations on team pink!

It sounds good that they're not worried about it, hopefully they'll be able to confirm it's nothing to worry about at the follow up scan.

I hope he's feeling better soon pixie

I can't wait till tomorrow, time goes quickly for me during fri/weekend, it'll be scan time before I know it! The six nations is starting this weekend, I'm so excited that I've ordered myself some non alcoholic beer

Is that rugby ?

yes it is it's about the only sport we both like! I hate football and hate being made to watch it.

 

[GeralynB]

Hi ladies. Sorry I haven't been around much, I just don't find I have time to keep up!

Had our scan, I cracked like an egg and found out we are having a GIRL! Yay!

All looked well except one little random unexplained "bright spot" in baby's right chest that they have no clue about. Bright is usually calcification they say but we have to go back for a follow up to check in 6 weeks. Anyone heard of this? Seems relatively common but Google says usually it's associated with heart or bowels and this was just in chest...a bit freaky!

Pixie big hugs, try and think of it as a tool to get extra support to help xander succeed...I can imagine how hard that was to hear though.

I don't know about the bright spot but congrats on a girl!

 

[GeralynB]

I'm going to meet with another potential doula today. I met with one already but didn't love her.