Just don't know how to get through the lack of sleep!

[heather1212]

Hi everyone, so my 16 day old is being exclusively breastfed and it is going well.
He sometimes gets some trapped wind making him very uncomfortable and he brings up a bit of milk after most feeds.
The thing that's making things so hard for me is the fact that my LO just feeds constantly all nite, I'm normally able to get to sleep at about 7 in the morning but just for a couple of hours. I can't seem to pull my sleep back in the day as LO only goes an hour or normally an hour and a half between feeds. The most he's ever been is 3 hours, but that is very rare!
He's putting on weight like a real champ and everyones telling me I'm doing so well, but how do I get through this sleep deprivation?

My husband wants us to give a dummy/pacifier which I'm really against!
Or he wants me to start pumping so that he can feed LO with a bottle while I try and sleep. I'm just worried it's too soon to introduce a bottle.

Please if anyone can offer me some advice I'd really appreciate it!

Heather x

 

[SazzleR]

I got through the early weeks by taking LO to bed for a nap on an afternoon! This was suggested to me by the BF support worker who saw me weekly. He would sleep for a lot longer in bed with me so I got a couple of hours. Just look up safe co-sleeping before you do it.

You also just have to forget about trying to get back to normal. I forgot about the house, lived off meals from the freezer or take aways & hardly got out of my PJs! I saw to LO, ate & BF. That was about it! Watched a lot of tele too!

 

[DarlingMe]

On a rough night when LO is up more often I will stay in bed for 12 hours or more just nursing, napping, and maybe reading a bit. Not sure if this is an option if this is your first child or not? It still isn't the same as a full sleep but it helps alot. I usually cannot nap later in the day either but if we "sleep in" I can sleep. Even with 12 hours in bed it isn't strange to only get 7 hours of sleep by the time LO eats, changes, and settles, then I settle it has been 90 minutes times 3-4 feedings...

As for the dummy/pacifier we use one. Some babies just have a stronger urge to suck. I heard to wait until after 6'weeks but we started at just a few days and have no supply problems. LO will nurse in the evenings for 4 hours off and on but at night he gets the paci!

We use a bottle too a handful of times. We had to supplement dues to jaundice and 15% weight loss at birth so LO had a bottle the first couple days. He also has gotten EBM a few times, again no issues. Use a low flow nipple and babies will almost always chose the breast! You have to keep yourself healthy and sane to care for your LO!

 

[patch2006uk]

You're right, your LO really is too young to be introducing bottles and dummies. You really don't want to introduce anything to your LO until 6 weeks, for risk of nipple confusion and supply issues longterm. He needs to get your supply established, as well as strengthening his jaw for BFing. Bottles and dummies require a different sucking action, so his jaw may get used to working in a different way if you supplement too early before he's learned what he's doing.

Your LO has his days and night's backwards, so he's getting most of his nutrition during the night. This is normal for newborns the sleep deprivation is so difficult! Can you sleep during the day when LO sleeps? I'm not a napper, but the naps during the day when LO was small saved my sanity.

I didn't get on with cosleeping, but that is another option if you need more rest, as you can just lie down and feed LO and shut your eyes at the same time.

You will get through this. You need your husband's support, so explain to him that advising you to introduce dummies or expressed bottles is undermining and detrimental to BFing in the early days. Your LO needs to nurse often to build up your supply and gain some weight.

Could someone take LO out for a 30/40 minute walk? That should be long enough for you to rest a little, and your LO won't be forced to go too long between feeds.

It really will get better! The early days are so difficult, but in a few weeks you'll be over the worst and BFing will be established and hopefully you'll be getting more sleep as LO learns the difference between day and night! Good luck

 

[Elmo5]

I used to spend all day on the sofa with the moses basket next for me. Then go to bed same time everynight (which I still do) with the LO to get the most sleep.

In a couple of months time those initial few weeks of tiredness will just be a haze.

 

[Bex84]

My LO was like this, she fed every hour if not more to start with. I co sleep which I find takes less effort and disrupts less sleep to feed her. She also sleeps better on me and is now starting to go for longer periods of time sleeping. We dont use a dummy since I do not like them. My husband was talking about how to increase time between, he wanted me to let her cry (I did not want to do this, I let LO lead on when she wants to sleep and eat), he worried about my lack of sleep however he was supportive once I explained why I would not let her cry. She has naturally fallen into a pattern. I make sure in the day that the room is bright and interact alot with her and at night it is quiet and dark. LO witin a few weeks has worked out difference between night and day. Hope you get more sleep soon and just remember to rest, even if you arnt asleep it helps

 

[qt_nurse]

Congrats on sticking with it! The early days are so so hard, and trying to function with such little sleep is really difficult. I am not sure how I did it, I just did what I had to do. My OH was the same, wanting to do bottles and the soother so that I could get a break. We ended up having to top up with formula and expressed milk due to weight loss, and we introduced the soother just for our own sanity. We did this when she was 2 weeks old. We still do the odd bottle of ebm or formula, however she hates the soother. But I will tell you, she did not get nipple confusion. She very much prefers my breasts to the bottle...some evenings OH tries to let me nap when he gets home and tries to give her a bottle while I nap and she just won't take it but as soon as I offer breast she just guzzles away.

Every LO is different, so while it is probably best to listen to all the info about not introducing bottles etc, it does work for some people, and if it can give you a chance to get some much needed rest, even for a day, then I think you should take advantage of it.

I find it hard to nap when she naps during the day as well, especially when the feeds are so close together. That too will get better with time. It may not feel like it now, but it really will get better. My LO had the days and nights confused too, and up until last week was going to bed at 2-3am. Just like others have mentioned, try to keep the room light, get outside for fresh air, be noisy during the day and do the complete opposite at nighttime, eventually her days and nights will be figured out.

I know its hard, the sleep is the hardest part I think, but somehow you just manage and before you know it she will sleep much longer and nurse less often. My LO started sleeping 5 -7 hours at night when she was 7 weeks old, during the day she still nurses every 1-3 hours. I feed her as much as I can during the day.

Good luck to ya, hope you get some much needed sleep!
Heather

 

[fieldmouse]

I don't have any advice but am in the same situation. I manage 2-3 hours sleep in the morning and maybe an hour or so in the day, but i'm not a good napper even if I am exhausted - actually think that makes it harder for me to grab a nap as it takes me too long to wind down. It's so hard. Am propping my eyes open right now with bnb and reading posts about how it does get better to keep myself going!