just need to complain i think.....

[jillypoop]

hi guys

first of all HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!

Okay, so me and OH for those of you that havent seen me moaning on here, have been together for just over 2 years. Since last summer really, we were seriously talking about our future. Although I wanted to get married asap at a quick registry office type wedding, OH decided he wanted to wait until he could give me the dream wedding.
We have always talked about kids. We have the names picked out and we know what kind of parents we would like to be. All that I am waiting for now is to be a mummy.

OH is more than happy to talk about it happening and he gets all excited but as soon as it comes to "doing anything" about it, he says we aren't ready. I know the money situation is really tight but everything is all a bit up-in-the-air at the moment. I feel like I need a timescale. I thought that this would be the year we get married but now I am doubting it. OH has the opinion that we have been together a while and will be forever so why rush, whereas I want to make it official and start a family as soon as I can!!!

For some reason, today it is bothering me more than usual. Every time I try to talk seriously about it ie when we will start ttc, we end up talking about what kind of parents we will be and so on.

I don't know what to do. Feel like my dreams for the future don't really mean anything to him at the moment. Surely he knows how I feel. I get so down about things and have been suffering from depression on and off in the past year and this has made my "downturns" more common. Feel like I am being denied what I was brought on this planet to do!

I know it sounds dramatic but thats how I feel.

Basically I'm hoping that you guys have the same down days, or if not, at least understand so I don't feel so alone.

thanks xxxxx

 

[Mrs Doddy]

I totally understand. When we got married H said we could start trying 2 years after we were married but I wanted something a little more set in stone than 2 years, so we set a "date" as it were which gave me a focus.

H is the same he will talk about it but when I say that we are hopefully going to have a baby this year - he laughed really nervously. I guess for us we have more of a feeling of wanting to be pregnant - this is something that they are never going to understand as they don't go through that bit.

Haven't really got any advice on getting your partner on your level im afraid

 

[Pinkgirl]

Aww hun dont feel down.

I am sure lots of people have down days i do i know and me and my partner are in same situation about the marriage/children situation.

What about a nice glass of wine hehe only joking, to me talking is the best method to get things of my chest

xx

 

[jillypoop]

as horrible as it sounds its kind of nice knowing that I'm not the only one in this situation!

I'm almost starting to feel like I'm pressuring him into marrying me and having a family with me. He says he wants to marry me but at the end of the day we could easily get married tomorrow! We only live 20 minutes away from Gretna for crying out loud!! I'd love a wedding like that with just the two of us, maybe my little sis as a witness, mainly just because she would never speak to me again if she wasnt there!

Ive started to think about proposing to him instead! Thats so not me, I was going to get him an engagement ring too, as I think its a really nice gesture but the fact that I've changed my opinion on that shows how desperate I am. Don't even know why I am so desperate. It's strange and makes me feel pathetic!

xxx

 

[Alexas Mommy]

as horrible as it sounds its kind of nice knowing that I'm not the only one in this situation!

I'm almost starting to feel like I'm pressuring him into marrying me and having a family with me. He says he wants to marry me but at the end of the day we could easily get married tomorrow! We only live 20 minutes away from Gretna for crying out loud!! I'd love a wedding like that with just the two of us, maybe my little sis as a witness, mainly just because she would never speak to me again if she wasnt there!

Ive started to think about proposing to him instead! Thats so not me, I was going to get him an engagement ring too, as I think its a really nice gesture but the fact that I've changed my opinion on that shows how desperate I am. Don't even know why I am so desperate. It's strange and makes me feel pathetic!

xxx

aw, I know waiting can really get depressing, especially when you don't know "when" you will be trying. I was going to have a quick wedding, no invites just me and OH and two witnesses, back in July, and I postponed it-because I decided I wanted something more memorable-something we can look back on and say, wow, that was fun!! I am so glad I postponed it because my wedding is something I feel should be important, and not just "slapped together" I am not saying an expensive wedding is something I want, I don't, but I want something where I will have fun, and have great memories of. I feel like back then I was wanting to get married "just to be married" if that makes any sence. I think a wedding is worth waiting for, because you only get one (in most cases!!) Anyway, hang in there... PS my best friend just got engaged yesterday, and she has been with him for longer than me and my OH, and I know that his proposal was long awaited for, but, at the same time, for her, it was well worth the wait!!