Just started trying - what to expect?

[floridasian]

Hi all,

D&H and I just started TTC#1 this month (mid cycle). CD1 was July 4th and I just started charting three days ago but I have been recording my AF arrival dates for the last 7 months and they were all around 26-27 days (with one exception of 25 days). Since I don't have much data to go by I assumed I would O around CD13 and we BD'ed on CD11,12,14 (today is CD15). I haven't been checking my CM either until three days ago but I haven't noticed any changes in CM.

DH and I aren't normally that active so I guess my question is how much longer should we continue to BD this cycle? I have no idea whether I ovulated this cycle yet (or will be at all). It's quite exhausting and I feel like I'm treating him like a dud with all that frequent BD and quite embarrassed too to initiate it myself all the time now. Should I just treat this cycle as a test and focus on the next one? Is it even worth it at this point to start using OPK's this cycle? Since I hit my 35th birthday last month I really feel the clock ticking (especially with my mother and my grandmother hitting menopause at the age of 45 & 40 respectively!)

Lots of newbie questions! Sorry!

Thanks in advance.

 

[Cookie1979]

Hello, you could try using opks but if you have missed the surge then its abit of a waste...as you have shortish cycles you've probably already ovulated, that's obviously not guaranteed because it depends on the length of your luteal phase...I assumed mine was 14 days because I thought thats how long everyones is, but mine is 16 days. If yours is shorter (they tend to be 12 +) then could mean you haven't ovulated or are about to. I would maybe bd again if you can, but sounds like you've done plenty so you might have been lucky.

I use opks and check my cm, if you google it there are instructions on how to check your cm...I never realised you were supposed to put a finger right up there lol!!! :s

I'd say though as you are late in ttc this month I would say wait and see what happens and if af arrives you can start afresh next cycle and try and work out when you are ovulating.

This is my second cycle and I've decided to try temping...just need to remember to actually start, keep forgetting.

Good luck. xx

 

[floridasian]

Thanks for the quick response! The whole TTC thing is exciting but nerve-racking at the same time!

 

[Mommyloves]

oooh I can so relate.. it is sooo tiring to DTD every day.. or even every other day!! I would strongly suggest using Fertility Friend if you haven't already.. it is a great app and you can track everything and it tries to help you decode your cycle. You don't have to temp to use it either, but it does help

My cycle ranges so much that FF puts my O at CD15-20, so I would say to DTD until the 16th just to be safe.. that way, even if your LP is 10 days, you will be good

As for OPK's, I would NOT recommend you use them mid cycle because they are expensive and only drive you crazy. I made the mistake of starting them mid cycle in april and I got a positive right before AF, so I think it caught the wrong surge very frustrating because I made sure to DTD every day only to have AF come 3 days later

just remember, you are not out until AF comes, so keep positive! I wish you the best of luck!

 

[floridasian]

Yes I am using the free charts on FF - started three days ago. I've been reading a lot about O signs and I just can't tell whether or not I O'ed. I guess it takes a few cycles to know. Hopefully I am not too old to O. I've been so stressed out that I might be too old since we decided to start trying that I am starting to think that I might not O at all this cycle. And I'm out of town all week next week without DH so I'd better O before Sunday!

 

[Cookie1979]

You are definitely not too old to ovulate, and I think people think after 35 their chances of conceiving diminish by quite alot, but actually they don't. I was reading an articule on here and I think after 35 (think its 35 -38 or something I can't remember exactly) the percentage of women that conceive in the first year drops by about 2% so its not much at all, and certainly not the massive drop we are led to believe. I'm 34 and ttc my second baby, I do worry about ovulation esp as I have PCOS but its best to relax and try not to worry too much.

You aren't too old though not by a long shot so please try not to let it worry you, stress will not help the whole conceiving process.

I never thought that I had ovulation signs at all, but it was only when I properly started checking my cm that I realised actually I have quite clear cm changes. Not everyone does though, and I did read that some women despite having ewcm don't find it visible as it sits round the cervix. There's a cough medicine that apparently increases cm...random but true!

Good luck!!! xxx

 

[floridasian]

Thanks for the encouraging words Cookie! I figured you were 34 by your username.

I know the whole stress thing doesn't help but it's so hard not to think about it! And it's not just about conceiving - I also worry about miscarriages at my age. My first cousin who is three years older than me already had three miscarriages in the past year so that scares me a bit too.

Any way, just waiting for this week to be over and I'll be working out of town next week so hopefully I'll be able to get my mind of the whole TTC thing for a bit!

Best luck to all!!

 

[Cookie1979]

Ha ha I'd forgotten my username was Cookie1979 lol...ok I hadn't but I didn't really think about the fact that I had put 1979 in it...I did create it back in 2010 when I was pregnant with my son.

There is no reason to think that you would have an mc, I realise its easy to fear something that someone close to you has gone through but it is quite unusual to have multiple mc's and its usually due to there being a problem. Odds are in your favour.

Yeh try and chill out and relax...I tell you to relax though but I'm totally and utterly obsessed with ttc and I dont take my own advice at all. I'm terrible...I've spent far too much time on google, I google everything! Its not good! Its started off because I wanted to be as informed as possible in regards to trying to conceive but now I think I've read too much. I think its possible to know too much!!! lol

Best of luck to you! Think positive and there is absolutely no reason why this wont happen for you. xx

 

[MIZZYD]

Good Luck on your journey =)

 

[floridasian]

Ok, now that I have a few more days of data in (only started charting & temp'ing since CD 13) - can anyone please look at my chart and tell me if it's possible to see if based on the limited data here whether or not I O'ed this month? If so, is it possible to tell about what date I O'ed? Keep in mind my cycles are normally around 26-27 days (with one month being 25 days in the last six months).

Thanks!

 

[susied]

I'm no expert but if you have one more rise in temp, I think u may have O'd on cd15. good luck!

 

[MIZZYD]

As of now I would say CD16, but I am also no expert =)

 

[floridasian]

Argh - that is just great. We did not BD the past two days because I thought I already o'ed and we were pre-occupied by other things and now it's obviously too late

 

[Onions]

Don't give up hope! If conditions are right sperm can live up to a whopping 5 days after ejaculation so you may still get lucky