Let's get pregnant in 2012!!!! TTC #1 after loss

[Tanzibar83]

Hey girls,

Well since posting on this part of the forum I've had lots of support and well wishes from you all but I'm wanting to do right now is to buddy up with someone who has no other children as I don't have any and would just love to talk.

anyone out there?



https://www.babyandbump.com/data:image/png;base64,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

 

[Smiler82]

Hi Tanzibar,

I'm in the same boat - would be great to chat anytime. I haven't spent much time in this forum I'm afraid so I don't know your story. Mine is ttc for over 2 years with PCOS and 2 mc's, no children yet. How about you? How are you doing?

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey Smiler82 - I'd love to buddy up with you. it comes in waves just thinking about it you know? this time last week nothing was wrong, I'd been for a scan on the monday and saw the heartbeat and now nothing.

heres my story, started august 2010, had irregular cycles so went to the docs and to cut a long story short they found an endometriuoma on my left ovary which was probably the cause for my irregular cycles, so I was put on clomid and the 2nd round was successful but lost the baby 8 weeks 2 days (Tuesday just gone).

My whole world just fell apart you know? one minute we had plans for the next 12 months, we'd been on holiday and bought baby some clothes and was planning to tell people xmas day....but the next it's all gone to crap.

Sorry to hear about your losses, what happened with you honey? don't worry if you'd rather not go into detail, I understand

 

[Smiler82]

Oh hun, I'm so so sorry for your loss. I didn't realise it was so recent. It is such a shock isn't it when you think you're going to be starting your family and you lose your baby. I totally know what you mean about it coming in waves - my losses happened a while ago now but it still hits me some days when I least expect it.

I don't mind sharing at all I've always had irregular cycles and knew for years I had PCOS before we started ttc. It took about a year, and I fell pg in June 2010. I had some problems with bleeding and at first everything was shown to be fine on a scan, but at another scan there was no heartbeat. The day I turned 10 weeks I went in for an op as I was terrified of a natural mc. Then I got pg 3 months later, a real surprise and we felt so lucky and so grateful we didn't have to wait another year to get pg. This time I had a natural mc at 12 weeks. That was back in Jan, so it's nearly been a year and we're still ttc with no luck. Looking to start clomid soon.

I've found it hard to talk to friends and family as no one else really understands. You can't if you've not been through it so I don't blame them really, but it hurts. I was on a different forum that really helped, then I found this website and really like. I had some counselling as well - even though DH has been an absolute star this whole time, sometimes you just need to talk to someone else don't you, and since none of my friends etc were really able to deal with it I thought it'd be a good idea. It has been really helpful and I'm glad I went.

How about you hun, have you been getting much support from the people around you? Sounds like Christmas is going to be hard for both of us - my sister is pregnant and am getting nervous about the baby talk that's inevitably going to happen round the dinner table. Find it hard to believe this time last year I was the one expecting a baby and everyone was asking me how I was feeling etc.

 

[Tanzibar83]

It must be so hard to go through more than 1 loss, it makes me sad that you've been through that. How long did it take for the healing process? I'm off work on compassionate leave and I can't even think imagine going back to work, I don't even want to think that far ahead, I dont even want to think about tomorrow, it's a day by day thing.

I'm getting annoyed by my dad, he keeps on ringing and asking me things like what I'll be doing next week, when or if I'll need any xmas shopping doing - all I want to do right now is just do nothing you know? It hurts to think of the future with no baby.

How long did it take for your cycles to go back to normal? did they or did they become more regular? I've heard so many stories where women get pregnant shortly a m/c, they say you're more fertil afterwards

I've been getting lots of attention and support but sometimes it's too much, I know I have to be around people but at the minute I'm fine on my own, I'm not depressed, I'm just upset and annoyed.

like I said about my dad, he's rang everyday now and I know it's because he cares but I don't know what he wants me to do, does he want me to start saying "yes I'm perfectly fine now, nothings wrong, I'm making progress?" - I want to go at my own pace!!!!! hubby I think just wants to get back to normal quickly, but he's been so great and just as upset and open about it.

Yes xmas will be a bad one and in some ways I just want 2012 to get here but in other ways I don't want to say goodbye to this year. It's my bday next week to - what a nice way to look forward to it right?

I hope you get through xmas dinner table talk, how many people knew? it's going to be hard for me because everyone around our table bar my grandma knew so I'm going to have to sit there all smiley and happy and pray she doesn't ask me when the kids will come along!

 

[AngelBaby1115]

Good morning ladies, I just want to say you are not alone. I recently mc'd too (nov 2011) and I have no kids either. I have had so many women tell me they're sorry that already have children. I know a loss is painful no matter the situation but I think its easier to cope when you have others to look after. Unforunately I don't have another to help me focus on other things and with the holidays right around the corner its gonna be so depressing but hey what can I do. And to make matters worse no matter what family gathering I go to there are pg women. So there will be lots of baby talk going around. :sad: and its going to kill me knowing I should've been able to share in the convo. But I have gotta be strong, maybe it won't be so bad since evertone is trying to be so supportive and my DH has been my strength. This would've been our first child after ttc for 8 yrs but all I can do is pray we're next. So stay positive & I am always lurking around if you need someone to talk to. Lots of love, support &

 

[Tweak0605]

I'd love to buddy up with you ladies

So sorry to hear of your losses I've had 2, one in Feb/March of this year and one in June.

1st baby, we went for our 10 week appointment and couldn't find the heartbeat. Doctor said it was normal to not hear it that early and sent me for an ultrasound the next day. Less than 24 hours later, we found out our baby had died at 7w5d. Went for a D&C when I was supposed to be 12 weeks.

2nd baby, it was an early miscarriage at 5w2d. I don't think my levels were doubling appropriately, as I tested a week after my 1st BFP and the line was very very light and start bleeding the next day.

I too am finding it very hard to communicate to family and friends. It's been almost 6 months since the last m/c and no luck in TTC. I just don't think my family gets how hard it is. We didn't go to a Christmas party, because DH's cousin is 17 weeks pregnant, and I couldn't stand the thought of being around her. MIL told us to just ignore her and go. Not gonna happen.

This holiday season is already difficult and its worse when people don't understand.

 

[Tweak0605]

I'm getting annoyed by my dad, he keeps on ringing and asking me things like what I'll be doing next week, when or if I'll need any xmas shopping doing - all I want to do right now is just do nothing you know? It hurts to think of the future with no baby.

I've been getting lots of attention and support but sometimes it's too much, I know I have to be around people but at the minute I'm fine on my own, I'm not depressed, I'm just upset and annoyed.

I totally understand how you feel. After we found out about our first angel, my mom told me that they were coming up to NH to visit that weekend. 2 days after we found out. There was no way I could be around other people besides my husband, and I politely told her no. It's like people want to be there for you and support you, but at the same time it sufficates you. The weeks following, when people would find out and say "I'm sorry" it would make me more upset.

 

[AngelBaby1115]

I'd love to buddy up with you ladies

So sorry to hear of your losses I've had 2, one in Feb/March of this year and one in June.

1st baby, we went for our 10 week appointment and couldn't find the heartbeat. Doctor said it was normal to not hear it that early and sent me for an ultrasound the next day. Less than 24 hours later, we found out our baby had died at 7w5d. Went for a D&C when I was supposed to be 12 weeks.

2nd baby, it was an early miscarriage at 5w2d. I don't think my levels were doubling appropriately, as I tested a week after my 1st BFP and the line was very very light and start bleeding the next day.

I too am finding it very hard to communicate to family and friends. It's been almost 6 months since the last m/c and no luck in TTC. I just don't think my family gets how hard it is. We didn't go to a Christmas party, because DH's cousin is 17 weeks pregnant, and I couldn't stand the thought of being around her. MIL told us to just ignore her and go. Not gonna happen.

This holiday season is already difficult and its worse when people don't understand.

Tweak Im sorry for your losses, I can say I know how you feel but everyone handles things differently. I know its a difficult journey & I don't think the holidays will ever been the same. But we've gotta stay strong & trust & believe our time will come. Here if ya need to talk.

Tanzi I sent you a buddy request. Lots of love & baby dust ladies!

 

[Tanzibar83]

Hey Angelbaby1115 - no words can help with the healing, fact. Literally only time will make things a little bit better. I got your request thanks

I really can't be doing with xmas, I'm tempted to take the tree down but hubby says it's best not to be like that. I'm so sad it took you 8 years and all your efforts just feel like a waste. so do you know why it's taken you so long?

Hey Tweak0605 - I feel like you, I just want to avoid all situations where I may burst into tears, even before falling pregnant I said I didn't want to attend christenings and I'd just make some ballsy excuse, it was too hard. well it turned out there was a christening coming and I told my family I couldn't come and they just wouldn't listen - they kept on saying "it's important that you come, they don't happen that often, it's a one time event" - and now that I've been pregnant and lossed it I feel like some people may just ignore what I'm saying because they know best and I'm not thinking straight!

I think people say the things they say because they just want us to go back to normal, and I do want to get there, I have to get there but I'll go at my own pace.

It's a bit awkward for everyone around us don't you think? they don't know what to say or do or think so they reach out as best as possible but like you said it's suffocating.

 

[Smiler82]

Hi Angelbaby and Tweak - so sorry for your losses Tweak it must be so hard to be ttc for 8 years. Have you been having any treatment?

It is such an emotional time it's so hard for us and for everyone around us, I still get so cross and I think that's partly why it's taken me so long to deal with it. I get so angry that people won't talk to me about it but will happily sit there and yak about someone else's pregnancy or new baby. I feel like I would be able to deal with those conversations better if I knew that that person was also able to talk to me about my losses. One friend admitted she was just too scared of saying something to upset me, and I appreciated that. Had trouble with my family though as all they want to know is "what does the doctor think" when all I need to do is talk about my emotions.

I'm a lot better now but some days are still very hard - is that what you mean about the healing Tanzibar? I am much more positive on the whole than I was but it has been a real uphill struggle. I would say if you're not feeling up to work yet then don't. I had a week off after my 1st loss and instantly regretted being back as soon as I walked in the door. No one knew apart from my boss and a couple of friends so it was difficult pretending everything was ok and I made a lot of mistakes in my work because my mind could just not focus and to be honest I didn't care. It all seemed so pointless after what had happened. I started working freelance a while after, and with my 2nd loss I went right into a new job 4 days after, which I knew was a mistake but as freelance you don't turn down money!! I went into some kind of weird denial thing then, everyone thought I was ok but a few months later I just fell apart and that's when I started the counselling.


Physically after my 1st loss it took 12 weeks for things to settle down - I had the d+c so had spotting on/off for 3 months. When I got pg again I do think it was because of what they say about you being more fertile, and I'd been having reflexology. After my 2nd loss I had a 55 day anovulatory cycle, then after that things settled down (though with PCOS I'm never 'normal')

Does that help? Sorry to ramble x

 

[Tanzibar83]

smiler - it's good your friend admitted what a lot of people won't say. my mum asked if they knew what caused it but I explained they'll basically never know. Yeah thats what I mean about the healing process. I couldn't care less at this point if I become so rubbish at my job that they sack me, if it wasn't for house hunting and that silly little thing called money I wouldn't go back.

can't believe it took 3 months for things to settle down for you, that must have been a horrible daily constant reminder, I'm glad things are a little better now.

I'm not sure what to expect with my cycles because technically I have a period every other month, but i had been on the clomid for 2 months which drove my period down to 30 ish days. Here's hoping the old clomid will still take effect well

well it's nearly 3pm and Im still in my jammys, watching coronation street which is just so upsetting with the story lines (leanne who recently m/c, becky who couldn't conceive, tracy who's pregnant again, etc) - I swear the only reason I watch it is because I think the becky character is great, once she's gone it's bye bye stupid soap.

sorry if you've read the tv comment and don't have a clue what I'm talking about!

 

[AngelBaby1115]

Ttc after 8 yrs I basically gave up and fell pregnant, haha go figure right. I think I'm experiencing implantation bleeding now cause its not even enough to put on a liner. So I have decided Im going to attempt to enjoy my holidays & test after christmas. Refer to my post "implantation bleeding 3 weeks after d&c. And good luck ladies!!!!! & for us all!!

 

[AngelBaby1115]

Hey Angelbaby1115 - no words can help with the healing, fact. Literally only time will make things a little bit better. I got your request thanks

I really can't be doing with xmas, I'm tempted to take the tree down but hubby says it's best not to be like that. I'm so sad it took you 8 years and all your efforts just feel like a waste. so do you know why it's taken you so long?

Hey Tweak0605 - I feel like you, I just want to avoid all situations where I may burst into tears, even before falling pregnant I said I didn't want to attend christenings and I'd just make some ballsy excuse, it was too hard. well it turned out there was a christening coming and I told my family I couldn't come and they just wouldn't listen - they kept on saying "it's important that you come, they don't happen that often, it's a one time event" - and now that I've been pregnant and lossed it I feel like some people may just ignore what I'm saying because they know best and I'm not thinking straight!

I think people say the things they say because they just want us to go back to normal, and I do want to get there, I have to get there but I'll go at my own pace.

It's a bit awkward for everyone around us don't you think? they don't know what to say or do or think so they reach out as best as possible but like you said it's suffocating.

Just irregular cycles, no particular reason. So idk they have done every test & can still tell me nothing. I just figure when its my time then it'll happen again. We've literally have dtd over 2000x and only one pg to end in mc. But Im coping slowly, I have been told I have become bitter. Haha but of course it came from certain women that already have their prefect little families. But we're next ladies!! I just know it.

 

[Tweak0605]

Angelbaby - Thanks hun. I have good and bad days, more good then bad which is definitely a good thing. I was a mess in September which was the due date month of the 1st angel. You've been TTC for 8 years? That's so sad. Have you had any testing done? Just saw your post about the IB - good luck!!!!

Tanzi - I really don't want anything to do with Christmas this year either. It took all I had to put up the tree, and even then, I did it alone so if I needed to break down I could. Don't let people talk you into doing things you don't want to do - stand your ground if you don't want to go. Don't put yourself into a situation that's going to hurt. We told DH's aunt, the one hosting the Christmas party, why we weren't coming. She didn't know about either m/c and we told her we werent coming because of the pregnant cousin. She completely understood. If people were to come at me like they were to you, I would probably lash out and tell them why were weren't coming. What I've learned through all this, is people don't think. They like to badger and question you on everything. But stand your ground.

And I definitely agree with people being awkward around us. No one likes to talk about it, that's why pregnancy loss is such a taboo subject. My mom doesnt' want to talk about the miscarriage or me being pregnant or whatever. And even DH doesn't want to bring it up. I think they're afraid of hurting us, but when they just ignore it, it hurts as well. It's like our angels are a distant memory and everyone has forgotten about them.

Smiler - I've only been TTC for a little over a year, I think you got names mixed up

I still get cross with people too. I've come to the point that I don't care what comes out of my mouth anymore. I don't have a filter, especially when it comes to pregnancy. We didn't go to the Christmas party, cause I knew they'd be all over the pregnant cousin and talking about her pregnancy. But then there are me and DH with 2 miscarriages and no one wants to talk about them. It really does hurt.

I've definitely gotten better as the year has gone on. It definitely is an uphill battle, with some days better than others. Miscarriage changes you, and I will never ever be the same person I was before March. I didn't really take time off after both miscarriages. I did work from home, but went back to the office 3 days after finding out. Then worked from home the 2 days after my D&C. 2nd miscarriage I worked right through it in the office. I wish I did things different and actually did take time off to heal.

Damn, now I'm rambling

 

[Tanzibar83]

Oh Angel, you have such a positive outlook even though it must hurt very deeply, I can't wait to be at the stage you're at.

Tweak - I don't know about you but I feel like I could write a book with the way I'm feeling about the whole TTC and pregnancy business. I HATE HATE HATE the way hollywood portrays the happy ending and pregnancies, not everything is plain sailing.

I don't think I'll ever be the same again, I'll be the same wife but character wise there's just a part of me thats now missing

 

[Tanzibar83]

TMI you don't have to read!

I'm so sorry to say this but I've just gone and passed the placenta. It's so upsetting knowing it once fed baby and now it's just lying there in my towel, looks so fresh still and I'm very happy that hubby and I once created that along with the baby.

 

[Tweak0605]

Oh yeah, I feel like I could go on and on about TTC and pregnancy. That's how my journal is already over 100 pages. I've contemplated starting a journal on my computer with just my feelings and everything I'm feeling.

I think I'm going to buy a book on my Kindle about miscarriage. There's one on Amazon about women's stories when they miscarry and how they feel about it days, months, or years later. It might be good for me to read something like that.

I'm sorry about the placenta I remember seeing the sac when I passed it with my 2nd miscarriage. It was a horrible thing to see, knowing that it was once in my womb and now it's not.

Big hugs

 

[AngelBaby1115]

TMI you don't have to read!

I'm so sorry to say this but I've just gone and passed the placenta. It's so upsetting knowing it once fed baby and now it's just lying there in my towel, looks so fresh still and I'm very happy that hubby and I once created that along with the baby.

Im so sorry love. Just know you can grieve the loss of your baby, the hell with the people that don't understand. You all are strong beautiful women and our time will come. And you'll never forget that baby or the love you have for it. Just think its in heaven watching over mommy & daddy every day.

I'm just like any of you, I have cried until Im unable to cry anymore and I still have weak moments. You just have to think about your beautiful baby being taken care of by angels. Just stay positive, live your life & love those close to you. And always remember your lil bean & remember to never give up, miracles happen everyday. And we'll all be awesome mommies when its our turn. Lots of love and hugs.

 

[Tanzibar83]

I've rung the hospital to see if they want to placenta, they said they'll take it if we want them to. So once hubby is home I'm taking it down, I figure if baby can put a smile on our faces I'd love for cupcake to go and help as many others as possible. If they can't tell me their results or the cause thats fine, as long as it helps in the long run