Mama Bears TTC a rainbow - join us :)-- (69 ladies so far)-(29 BFP's!)

[kategirl]

Can I join in? I'm TTC #2, and just had an early MC during cycle #5 of trying. I'm trying to relax and know it will happen at some point, but the waiting and now the MC have me down and I don't want to get all depressed like I did with my last MC.

Is it okay if I join? I'm on CD #2, really hoping we can get our sticky BFP before my 30th birthday in December which would give us 5 more cycles of trying.

 

[Button#]

Hi Kate, just replied to your post on the SMEP thread as well!

 

[kategirl]

Right now I really just have this deep down feeling like I won't get a BFP until some time next year, or they won't stick. I just have a feeling like it's not going to work. Sigh. It's so hard to relax, especially when you had that hope and then it was lost.

I'm crossing my fingers and hoping that they're right about being more fertile after a MC! I did get a BFP two months after my last MC; I'm really hoping that we have better luck than we have the four cycles before this MC.

 

[GingerPanda]

Sorry for your loss, Kate. You're welcome here.

 

[hmmohrma]

Hey Ladies, I told you that when I went back for teacher training week I'd disappear. I have been keeping up with the posts through my email subscription though. DH and I are now on two week wait, but only the first cycle after mc. I'm not feeling too hopeful, but I am feeling a lot better emotionally AND we've had some real fun bding the last few times (thank goodness bc even the thought of it just hurt my abdomen for weeks.). Fingers crossed for a BFP in the next couple cycles so we can have a summer baby and I don't take maternity leave at the end of the school year!

And welcome Kate and sorry for your loss.

Dust and stickies to us all!

 

[o0oCharlieo0o]

Welcome Kate im so very sorry for your loss xx

And good luck hmmohrma xx

 

[Bug222]

welcome kate- so sorry for your loss

pos opk for me today!

 

[GingerPanda]

Catch that egg, Bug!

 

[kategirl]

Fx, Bug!

My emotions keep fluctuating insanely today. At some points I'm fine and cautiously optimistic that I'll get a BFP by the end of the year, at other points I feel like it's a sure thing within the next two cycles and I just can't wait to start, at other points I feel like I'll never get a BFP again and we're better off giving up and just adjusting to just having our DD. Ugh, I hate feeling like this!

 

[GingerPanda]

Fx, Bug!

My emotions keep fluctuating insanely today. At some points I'm fine and cautiously optimistic that I'll get a BFP by the end of the year, at other points I feel like it's a sure thing within the next two cycles and I just can't wait to start, at other points I feel like I'll never get a BFP again and we're better off giving up and just adjusting to just having our DD. Ugh, I hate feeling like this!

Just take a deep breath. You've got hormones and trauma from the loss. It just happened, after all!

From where I sit, you're in a good place. You do have your DD, so you do know you can have children. Of course, I know that losses are still absolutely traumatic, and all the emotions are hardly logical. Losses are still incredibly terrible, even if you do have children. Just remember that you don't have to make any decisions today. Let yourself heal a little first.

Take all the time you need to sort through your feelings. Don't push yourself if you're not ready. We're here if you need to vent.




AFM...

I finally stated red spotting after a few days of high doses of Vitex! I had stopped taking it for a while, since friend's wedding was coming up and all. I was fine not having AF lol

 

[kategirl]

Thanks, GingerPanda. I know you're right. And I know that I do want us to try again right away, I just know the waiting and wondering will drive me nuts. I think it's also a bit of hormones still too - it seemed like I had really bad mood swings and symptoms even before I got the BFP, and I'm not sure they're evened out yet.

My cousin (who's 42) also just announced their surprise 3rd child. I already had found out this weekend, and it had sounded so fun for us to be pregnant and have babies around the same time (she's due in February). Well, in the greater scheme of things I'm sure our kids will probably be close in age still, even if it takes me a while longer again.

I need to relax and think on the bright side!

 

[kategirl]

One hard thing is my mom keeps saying how the test was just wrong and I wasn't really pregnant since AF came only a couple days late . But I took a digital test and it said Pregnant and I felt really pregnant - even though I only knew a couple days, I was pregnant again. Sigh.

Anyway, it's time for me to put on my big girl pants and move forward! No sense letting myself stay in this funk, I know it will only drive me nuts. Time to try again and catch a sticky bean!

 

[GingerPanda]

I know it's hard. I've been trying for #1 for more than 2 years and had two losses. Turns out I don't ovulate without heavy doses of Clomid, and I probably have a blood clotting disorder that kills my babies when I finally do fall pregnant. It just seems like it's always hard for people who really don't deserve such terrible things. How many crack addicts out there are having their third or fourth drug-addicted babies, when I've never even smoked a cigarette?

 

[Button#]

Good luck Bug!

Kate - ignore your mum. Make sure you take time to heal.

 

[Pixiedust22]

Welcome and sorry Kate. I have those same fluctuations of optimism and negative thoughts... I guess all we can do is wait and see.

 

[o0oCharlieo0o]

Good luck bug!!

Well i was feeling really positive about this month but today all of a sudden i dont feel positive at all, looking at my chart i dont think i BD enough around time of ov, what do you guys think? I just feel like i wasted the good month, next month is my messed up month where i have about a 40 day cycle with loads of spotting and bleeding inbetween my period :/ hopefully i feel so doubtful for nothing, i guess I'll know i about a week lol x

 

[Button#]

Charlie - you're still way too early to tell if you're out or not so try not to worry. With DS we only DTD once a week and I got pregnant, you only need one spermy! Have you been to the dr about your irregular cycles and mid cycle bleeding?

 

[kategirl]

Charlie - Last cycle we only BD'd four days prior and two days prior to when I should have O'd (we were on vacation and didn't get a chance closer to O) and we got a BFP so you never know! I actually read somewhere recently that two days prior is the most likely to give a BFP.

 

[kategirl]

I was just reading the SMEP e-book and saw this line:

"It has always been my perspective that a positive pregnancy test is the beginning of your new life journey, whether it lasts only a few days after the test or for the long lifetime of your child. The confirmation of a pregnancy is what transitions you into a mother, and that status cannot be taken away, no matter what happens after this life-changing moment."

Sigh. That's making me feel a little better this morning.

 

[GingerPanda]

Awww, that is very sweet!


Hubs and I are the opposite of religious, but we choose to believe that the little soul that was meant to be our first child will keep coming back. We haven't lost them, it's just been delayed. That helps us get through it.