Miscarriage in March, now 3 months of TTC no BFP yet, how to relax??

[motp]

Hello ladies!

My husband and I have an awesome 2.5 year old son and are trying for #2. I got pregnant very quickly with him (month 2) and was 35 at the time. We started trying for #2 when he was 22 months old and I was still BFing him. I thought it might be messing with my temps and Luteal phase, so after 2 months of no BFP, I stopped BFing him (he was only BFing before bed anyway) and we got pregnant on month 3. Unfortunately I had a miscarriage at 11w5d. The ultrasound showed the fetus was only about 8 weeks though so it must have stopped developing right after my 8 week ultrasound when everything looked fine.

We started trying again a few weeks after I stopped bleeding cause of what "they" say about being really fertile after a MC, but nothing that month. It's now been an additional 3 months of perfectly timing our BD'ing. I'm temping, using OPKs and we have been BD'ing for the 2 days before and day of ovulation. No BFP yet. I KNOW they say it can take a while - particularly since I just turned 38. But I got pregnant so fast before I just feel impatient. I'm taking my prenatal and folic acid, and we use preseed. I started researching other types of tips - like taking robitussin - which we tried last month. My CM is pretty EW, but there's not nearly as much of it as there used to be. Sigh.... I might just be paranoid though. I know people who conceived easily for #1 and then had a terrible time with #2 and I'm scared.

Sigh.... I'm sure there are others in this situation? Tips on relaxing?

 

[Kitty1979]

No tips for relaxing I'm in same boat we conceived LO first month really trying. Decided to ttc no 2 in jan, was very relaxed about it thinking it would happen straight away again then MC in April and nothing since. We are same perfectly timed sex but no luck so far. Af was 4 days late this month and I was so hopeful but witch turned up and onto a new cycle. I know it's not been that long trying but I'm getting stressed also, I'm 35 in sept. Sorry no help but just wanted to let you know your not alone!

 

[sheyan]

hi
i just jumped forums after suffering a miscarriage in April. i am 38 and this was my first pregnancy. i got pregnant on my very first round of clomid and was soooo happy. but as of today, this is my third round of clomid since the MC and I can only pray that this is my lucky month.

having said all of that, i fully understand how you feel and the level of impatience you are experiencing and the inability to relax. i myself can't get it out of my mind, and the fact that it happened so easily the first time makes it even more frustrating.

i have tried everything, reading, praying, burying myself in work.. but nothing seems to help, i guess there is no easy way to relax and play the waiting game.
but thank god for this forum that we can support each other through it all.

with all my heart i wish you the best of luck and don't ever loose faith

 

[motp]

Thanks Kitty and Sheyan for your responses. It definitely is tough, hoping we all get our BFPs soon. I've been trying to stay off FB cause it seems all of my friends are getting pregnant right now, and in particular one friend is pregnant with the exact same due date I had before my MC, so it's tough seeing her baby bump pics cause it just reminds me of where I would be if I hadn't MC'd. I'm of course happy for her and expressed that to her when she first announced she was pregnant, but I don't think I need to see every photo and update about her pregnancy. It's just not healthy for me. So I'm just trying to focus on my family and work and our new life (we just moved to CA a few months ago).

Sigh....

 

[sheyan]

ladies lemme ask you something

have any of you ever noticed a very very light spotting immediately after ovulating. this is something i usually experience, i don't see it on the Tp or anything just on the panty shield ... it is usually pinkish brown... and this goes on from when i believe my egg dies till AF. this month however, i ovulated early (since the MC my cycle has gone from 28 to 29 days and ovulation between days 14 and 15) but this month i ovulated on CD11.... well that was the first day i tested and it was positive..i hope i didnt ovulate the day before because DH and I were waiting to start BDing. anyhoot, on CD 10 i noticed this same stain on the shield and i found it very strange cause i know this shouldnt have happened until after ovulation. again on CD11 it was pinkish brown.

to tell u guys the truth i already feel disappointed as im afraid we missed this month..... i'm trying so hard ot to be anxious or stressed but i simply cant...

this is sooo difficult

 

[motp]

Hmmmm I've always looked for spotting or something similar after o but have never seen it. Are you temping and did you see a temp rise?

 

[sheyan]

motp
hi, no i have never temped, only relied on opks ... maybe i should consider that if this month really is a failure.
how are you tho?.. any progress in relaxing? if u have a hobby maybe you should focusing on that.

as for me i'm starting university in September, part-time of course, gotta work... but i wanna keep myself very busy

 

[o0oCharlieo0o]

Hi hunni, i got pregnant on my first month of NTNP and then miscarried my baby in November, i started straight after the bleeding again with the NTNP and didnt fall pregnant, since then i have been doing opks and still havent fallen pregnant, its been 8 months now with no luck so this month iv started charting see if that helps, my af is still messed up from my miscarriage so no idea whats going on i with my body. I dont know what advice to offer in the way of relaxing but i do feel if i wasnt so tense trying for my rainbow baby id stand a better chance of actually getting it. Good luck hun i hope you get your rainbow really soon xx

 

[motp]

motp
hi, no i have never temped, only relied on opks ... maybe i should consider that if this month really is a failure.
how are you tho?.. any progress in relaxing? if u have a hobby maybe you should focusing on that.

as for me i'm starting university in September, part-time of course, gotta work... but i wanna keep myself very busy

Temping will tell you if you've ovulated so might be with giving it a shot. I'm doing pretty well. I've been on a business trip for the past few days and am at the airport waiting to go home. I actually forgot my thermometer at home so have not temped for the past couple days. I should be o'ing some time next week so will start back up w the temping and opks when I get home.

Keeping busy is a good idea. I work part time and we have a 2 year old son that keeps me/us busy most of the time. We are moving next week so need to prepare for that. All in all I'm feeling pretty good. Its always the day that I get AF and the couple days after that I get really upset and impatient.... Usually by CD 4 or 5 I let go of tbat dissapointment and try to focus on the next cycle...

Keep in touch!