My little rant...

[AEM1803]

well hello again ladies..

ive been feel very low and down on myself lately.. its gotten to the point where i just want to hide from the world until i get the news that im pregnant again and can put what happened to me all in the past..
Today it hit me really hard as I got out of the shower and looked down to see my hideous scar left behind from my ectopic
i have never been the type of person to be depressed and let it get in the way of my daily life.. i started to feel angry towards people with children or people who were pregnant.. instead of being happy for them..
i know that i need to change.. and i need to learn how to greive and cope with loosing my baby.. but i just dont know how
i miss my little baby every day.. i cant seem to fill that void and that empty feeling...

I decided that my OH and myself need to name our little bean.. maybe it will bring us some closure and a little hope for the future...

well ladies.. thnx for reading my rant.. i will keep u posted on the name we choose to name our little angel

Good luck to everybody in the journey we are all on TTC

 

[greeneyes0279]

I still have days where I'm down. I still struggle with not being jealous of others who are expecting. A miscarriage is difficult. You are not alone. I wish you the best!

 

[LittleBird]

I'm so sorry for your loss!

I just wanted to write back to you because I can totally understand where you're coming from. I keep thinking this might be the cycle and I just want to hang out at home until I get some good news. It's been 8 months since my first miscarriage and I just feel like my life is on hold until I can get pregnant again.

 

[clare22]

so sorry for your loss i no what you mean aswell..i no people around that are trying or could get pregnant by being reckless and i still dread the day when somebody else close to me tells me they are pregnant

 

[tinkerbell79]

So sorry for your loss. This is exactally how I feel, which is strange as I'm normally such a happy person, so everyone just expects me to be strong and get on with it - which just makes me even more angry! X

 

[AEM1803]

So sorry for your loss. This is exactally how I feel, which is strange as I'm normally such a happy person, so everyone just expects me to be strong and get on with it - which just makes me even more angry! X

I totally understand that.. I am normally a very strong person.. but for some reason I just cant get past this.. and that is making me more depressed that i cant seem to move forward.. my entire life is on hold until i can hold my precious baby in my arms

 

[tinkerbell79]

Are you trying at the moment? I'm going to start trying straight away, even before I get my first AF. I know having a baby is the only thing that will make me feel better. I know you cant replace one baby with another but it just gives you something positive to focus on and look forward to - a light at the end of a very dark and gloomy tunnel xx

 

[AEM1803]

Yes we started trying.. so far no luck.. i got my period yesterday
So fingers crossed for next month..
I just want to hold my baby in my arms and know that he or she is safe with me.. but at the same time.. i am so scared to get pregnant again.. i will have the constant fear of something happening again

 

[tinkerbell79]

Yes we started trying.. so far no luck.. i got my period yesterday
So fingers crossed for next month..
I just want to hold my baby in my arms and know that he or she is safe with me.. but at the same time.. i am so scared to get pregnant again.. i will have the constant fear of something happening again

I know, I really don't know if I can handle being pregnant again, I will be am emotional wreck for the whole 9mths x

 

[AEM1803]

I will probably be too.. I am going to be so cautious and nervous.. but the minute i finally get to hold my baby in my arms will be the best day of my life

 

[jojo23]

so sorry for your loss hun!! think its amazing how we go up and down with our emotions, i had mmc at 22 weeks in feb and have been TTC since with no luck really thought this was our month but feeling AF coming so once again its just getting me down! but we are all in this together hun and are always here for each other.. really hope you get your sticky bean soon hun and all the ladies on here also xxxxxxxxxx