My mom made me sad and hurt!

[Come_Bebe]

So when I had my first child my mom was around the entire time. After my daughter was about 3 weeks old my mothers mom had a stroke. I stopped seeing my mother but I understood the circumstances. Today I sit here writing this in need of support my daughter is 9 months today I'm pregnant with my second and my mom doesn't give a shit.

Isn't a Mother suppose to be loving and supportive of her child and most importantly of her grandchild? So I confronted my mom awhile ago telling her how I was hurt and that she doesn't spend anytime with my daughter so she started coming around religiously. After 2 weeks of that. It stopped again. Her excuse is that she has a lot to do. Mind you my mom doesn't work she's a homemaker with no children under 22. She always wants to be with her mother and will make all the time in the world for her siblings but how come she never wants to hang out with her daughters or grand daughter. Am I mistaken? Do I have a right to be hurt? I was trying to tell my mom this morning a coughis her priorities are in the wrong place and she didn't care. I said if you don't want to be a good grandmother or mother there shouldn't be a reason for you to be in our lives. She said I don't care. I said so if I take away your granddaughter and you can't see her anymore you don't care? She said it's up to you. I don't care what you do. So I responded with you don't have a daughter anymore or a granddaughter forget I exist. Don't call me I don't want to ever hear from you again. Then I hung up.

 

[THart]

This is unfortunate I'm very sorry hun.

 

[Come_Bebe]

I'm so sad I can't stop crying. I can't believe a mother would say this'

 

[mod19]

I'm so sorry! This is the worst time this could happen for you too with your hormones all over the place. Maybe your mom has something else going on. Maybe give her some time? I don't really know what to tell you but I wish I could give you a big hug. I couldn't imagine being without my mom. She's my best friend.

 

[Come_Bebe]

I have given my mom 30 years to come around. I wish she was my best friend. I know I will be my daughters best friend!

 

[Blizzy]

I am sorry you are going through this. My thoughts are that your mom is having something going on that she is not telling you. Maybe she feels that she only has limited time left with her mom and she wants to spend all of the time with her, and knowing that you and your daughter are younger she feels like you will always be around so no need to make an effort to see you often. It is very sad when a parent does this, my very close friend has issues with her mother being the same way. My parents are complete opposite and don't miss an opportunity to see the grandkids and are constantly trying to see them more often, take them for overnights, etc. My dad's dad was so busy while me and my siblings were growing up that he missed out on a lot of us older grandkids lives, he changed for my younger cousins and had a lot of special outings with them. It's hard to make up for not being there, and it hurts in a way that can't be repaired. Stay strong and maybe she will realize her mistake in the future.

 

[Come_Bebe]

My mom has always been distant so when I had my first I thought she had officially changed. Thanks for your support ladies. I hope I can move forward with this pain.

 

[minties]

How sad I am really sorry. I'm not all that close to my mum either and I don't think she likes my daughter.

 

[Come_Bebe]

How sad I am really sorry. I'm not all that close to my mum either and I don't think she likes my daughter.

I just can't imagine being like this with my daughter. Could you? It's awful and so painful. I have always tried to have my mom as best friend but she doesn't want that all she wants is her intermediate family mom and siblings it's so sad I guess we don't need them I want to be the best mom and favorite grandma so I need to just move on but it's been such a tough day!

 

[Oswin]

I'm ever so sorry hunni. I think you've done the right thing though. As sad as it is, you can't force someone to behave how they should. Your mum obviously just has some issues, and you should distance yourself from them. You have your own family now, and you'll be able to take your suffering and use it to become the mum you wish yours had been xxx

 

[LuckyMama13]

Sometimes our parents make mistakes...and they will regret it later on in life. Despite it all, it teaches you how NOT to be with your own children. As much as we want our families to be in our children's lives, we can't force them to be there. And in my opinion, if they don't make an effort, then we move on. You have more than enough love for your children and they will feel that from you. That's where it counts.

 

[minties]

How sad I am really sorry. I'm not all that close to my mum either and I don't think she likes my daughter.

I just can't imagine being like this with my daughter. Could you? It's awful and so painful. I have always tried to have my mom as best friend but she doesn't want that all she wants is her intermediate family mom and siblings it's so sad I guess we don't need them I want to be the best mom and favorite grandma so I need to just move on but it's been such a tough day!

No I can't imagine it at all! My daughter is like an extension of my heart walking outside of my body. I could never be so cold to her or not care about seeing grandchildren

 

[Come_Bebe]

She hasn't called to say I'm sorry or say she wants to see the baby. I guess it is what it is. I just can't believe this is happening to me. How sad!

 

[sbl]

This makes me so sad.
My mum and I have a great relationship. I wish and hope everyone has a good bond with their mum.
I can't imagine not having a supportive mum so I can only imagine how awful this is for you.
I really hope some day might work out and you guys could be closer.