Need advice - how to tell family member about pregnancy?

[tommyg]

I would send a text. "Hi how are you getting on? Hope you are doing well. Just wanted to let you know that I am expecting baby3".

Clearly she is hurting inside. She possibly finds being around your children a painful reminder of what she can't have, is unlikely too have and what she is missing out on. Pregnancy announcements can be hard, you are meant to be happy for the other person but at the same time you question "why is it happening for them and not me?".
Telling her the last time at a kids birthday party in front of a million relations was a tad insensitive. However damage is done and all you can do is be a but more sensitive this time round. Give her a few days to digest info before the family all start talking about it.

Infertility is a painful lonely road. People are more sensitive to mums who have lost and buried children than to the hidden grief of the mum who's child is never conceived. The minute a mum decides to start TTC a child is created in her mind, what will we call it, dreams of a future with family days out etc. When it doesn't happen she needs to grief for her child and the future planned with them. But at the same time she is on a ever fading monthly roller coaster thinking "maybe this month".

Give her the prior warning. And hopefully you can try and rekindle your relationship with her.

 

[iluvcocopops]

I was in a similar situation with a friend from work. I worried for ages about how to tell her, but then I started spotting in work & was in tears, so just told her. She said she is happy for me, but I know she isn't at all interested in hearing about baby/pregnancy talk, so I do try my best to keep it to minimum. I didn't do a Facebook announcement with this baby or my last daughter. I've just told people in person or messaged them my news. I don't mind down the line mentioning my pregnancy in a random fb post, but just never felt comfortable doing a big announcement, but maybe that's just me. I would send your friend a private message, but ask her how she is. After a few messages back & forth then maybe drop in that you're pregnant. Good luck x

 

[visionofmine]

UPDATE: I was able to tell my relative and everything went well. I think either my mother-in-law or my husband's friend may have let it slip out, but either way things are good. The day before I left for vacation another family member texted us about having lunch. I told them I couldn't because I would be out of town. The relative I was concerned about texted me and said "btw since you are on vacation don't have too much fun that you come back with a third friend." To which I replied Too late. She went on to ask me questions regarding the pregnancy and everything ended on a positive note.

 

[SleepyBaby]

Glad to see everything went well x